November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Should Be Gifted With Foresight

| Spokane, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

(I am running cash registers, and an elderly woman comes up with a $50 gift card and items. The woman is pretty chatty.)

Woman: “And my son gifted me this for my birthday. It’s really sweet of him. I’m glad he’s turning things around; he used to get into such trouble.

(I run the gift card, see that it isn’t registering, and try a few more times. I get a manager down to see if they can help. The woman was being quite patient about it. The manager can’t get it to work.)

Manager: “Uh. Where did you get this card?”

Woman: “Oh, my son gifted it to me, why?”

Manager: *hesitates* “I hate to tell you… but the card was never activated.”

(Which can mean the cashier forgot to scan it when it was bought, or more likely, that it was taken right off the rack and out of the store.)

Woman: “Son of a b****! I can’t believe it!”

Manager: “I apologi—”

Woman: “No, I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at my son for gifting me a stolen gift card! When I get home, I will give him a piece of my mind!” *to me* “I’m sorry to ask you to cancel the orders; I don’t have the money to spare right now.”

(She left the store right after. I could only speculate how the call went down!)

Needs A Part Of Truth

, | TX, USA | Liars & Scammers, Transportation

(The weather has been so cold and icy that numerous roads have been closed and our store-to-store delivery truck has been cancelled for the day. A mother and daughter walk into the store at around 10 am on a Tuesday and approach my co-worker, who’s still very new.)

Coworker: “Hi, how are y’all doing today?”

Daughter: “Hi, my name is [Daughter] and I ordered some parts yesterday. I was wondering if they came in yet?”

Coworker: “Okay. Give me a second to pull up your information.”

(He gets the necessary info from her and off the computer and goes into the back to look for her order and comes back a couple of minutes later empty handed.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t think your parts have arrived yet. It looks like they were ordered at [Time] yesterday which puts the delivery time at noon today.”

Daughter: “No! I didn’t order them yesterday. I ordered them on Saturday.”

Coworker: “The computer shows they were ordered yesterday, not Saturday.”

(At this point the women are getting more irritated.)

Mom: “Well, they should be here already!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but they won’t be here until at least noon.”

Mom: “Well, I thought they could get here sooner.”

(I step in.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but our store-to-store delivery truck isn’t coming at all today. The route has been shut down due to all the ice on the roads.”

Daughter: “Well, my order should have been here yesterday!”

(I look up her info again the same way my co-worker already had and notice that not only had the order been placed yesterday, but she had ordered all high-end, name brand parts.)

Me: “Well, our system shows that the order was placed yesterday at [time] and therefore would normally arrive today at 12:05. But, because of the road conditions, the truck is not making deliveries today. It won’t get here until tomorrow. I’m sorry.”

(Customer is starting to get really agitated and into a huff.)

Daughter: “Well, my car has already been on blocks for four days now and I need it to get to and from work!”

(I decide to try and see if we can find her parts in the store brand, since we’re more likely to have those on-hand.)

Me: “Well, let me see if I can help you find anything similar to the parts that you need. What’s the year, make and model of your vehicle?”

(She provides the info at which point I realize she’s just precisely described the only car in the customer parking lot, so I decide to call her bluff.)

Me: “Okay, and what color is it?”

Mom: “What does that have to do with anything?”

Me: “Is it purple?”

Daughter: “Yes, why?”

Me: “And it’s on blocks?”

Mom: “Yes! It’s been un-drivable for four days and she really needs it!”

Me: *pointing to the only car sitting in the customer parking lot* “Then how did you drive it here?”

(Both women left in embarrassment. They came back the next day for the parts that were ordered.)

It Would Be Penny-Wise To Accept Them

| Scotland, UK | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Money

Me: “Okay, sir, that’ll be £[Total], please.”

Customer: *begins rifling through his fanny pack for change* “Oh, god.”

Me: “You all right?”

Customer: “I… just… It won’t…”

Me: “Do you not have the right change?”

Customer: *brings out two fistfuls of change and plants them on the counter* “Oh, god.”

Me: *worried* “Umm?”

Customer: *continues to rifle through fanny pack and draws another fist of pennies* “Nooo.”

Me: “Sir, I think this is plenty. I—”

Customer: *moans as if in pain as he brings out two more fistfuls* “THEY’RE BREEDING!”

(I’m still laughing.)

Wrongly Accused

| London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

Customer: “Excuse me, can you help me find something?”

Me: “Of course, what were you looking for?”

Customer: “I need that leather jacket in the window.”

Me: “Yes, we have them just over here. What size were you after?”

Customer: “No! Not that one! This is black! I need the other one!”

Me: “I’m sorry, we only have one leather jacket in the window. What colour was the one you wanted?”

Customer: “I want the tan one! Honestly, how do you not know what is in your own window?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t actually have a tan leather jacket in store right now.”

Customer: “Oh, this is ridiculous. Come, look at your own damn window and pay a little attention for once!”

(The customer physically takes me by the wrist and leads me outside, past a baffled looking colleague working at the front door!)

Customer: “There! That’s the god-d*** jacket I want. Can you get it for me or find someone in the store who knows what they’re doing?!”

Me: “…Sir, this isn’t our window. This is [Store Next Door]’s window. They’ll be able to help you find the right size.”

Customer: “You should have told me I was in the wrong store in the first place!”

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 12

| NM, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

(It’s after we’ve closed, and I get an amusing call.)

Me: “Thanks you for calling [Store]. What can I do for you?”

Lady: “Hello. I was in earlier today, and I opened a [Store] card, and they forgot to give me my discount.”

Me: “I’m so sorry. We open at 12 tomorrow and you can come in and get it fixed then.”

Lady: “I live out of town. Is there any way you can fix it now?”

Me: “Well, um…”

Lady: “Can I speak with a manager?”

Me: “Ma’am, we’re closed.”

Lady: “Oh, I’m so sorry.”

Me: “Let me see if I can save you the trip. Our receipts are a little hard to read, and I just want to make sure they forgot your discount before you drive all the way back here. Can you read [certain line] on your receipt for me?”

Lady: *reads it*

Me: “Yeah, it looks like they forgot your discount. I’m so sorry, but you’re going to have to come in tomorrow to get it fixed.”

Lady: “Oh. It was sometime late this afternoon. Does that help you fix it?”

Me: “Well, ma’am, I can’t fix your receipt over the phone, and even if I could, we’re closed.”

Lady: “Oh I’m sorry.” *pauses* “I have the employee’s ID, does that help?”

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t fix your receipt over the phone, and even if I could, we’re closed.”

Lady: “Oh, I’m sorry.” *pauses* “I have the transaction number, does that help?”

Me: “No, and I can’t fix it anyway. We’re closed.”

Lady: “So I have to come back in tomorrow? Are you sure there’s nothing you can do?”

Me: “Yes, I’m sure. We’re closed. Have a nice night!”

(I told my dad (who also works in retail) this story, and he told me that next time, I should tell them that corporate turns the computers off. Apparently that makes more sense to the average customer than “We’re closed.”)

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 11
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 10
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 9