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    Self-Serves Him Right

    | Rolling Prairie, IN, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I’m off the clock at the fast food restaurant I work at. I’m waiting for my manager to get off, because I’m his ride home. My manager is the cashier, and there’s only one other employee besides me there. A customer walks up to the counter.)

    Manager: “Hi, what can I get you?”

    Customer: “I’ll have a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea, please.”

    Manager: “Okay, that’ll be [total].”

    (The customer pays, and his receipt is printed off.)

    Manager: “Your order number is 544, and it’ll be up shortly.”

    Customer: “Can I have my drink?”

    (My manager hands him a cup, since our drink station is self serve.)

    Customer: “There’s no tea in this.”

    Manager: “Yes, because our tea is self serve.”

    Customer: “I don’t do self serve. I don’t work here.”

    Manager: “So, let me get this straight, you want me to go out there and fill your cup up at our self-serve drink station?”

    Customer: “Yes, like I said, I don’t work here. I shouldn’t have to get my own drink.”

    (My manager turns to the other employee, who’s been listening to the entire conversation.)

    Manager: “Would you fill up his drink for him?”

    Employee: “No.”

    Manager: “Good answer.”

    (My manager turns back to the customer.)

    Manager: “Sorry, sir, but I can not fill your drink for you.”

    Customer: “Then give me my d*** money back.”

    Manager: “Okay, here is your money, sir. Have a good night.”

    Customer: “F*** you!” *walks away*

    Me: “In nearly four years of being here, I’ve never seen a customer not want to fill up their own drink.”

    Manager: “Same here.”

    Me: “Makes me wonder though; how does he get gas? There aren’t any full service gas stations off the interstate.”

    Manager: “Good point. Want a double cheese?”

    Me: “Sure!”

    This Round He Lost (In Translation), Part 2

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Food & Drink, Holidays, Top

    (There is a sizable line in the drive-thru. A rental car pulls up to order.)

    Me: “Hi, welcome to [restaurant]; how can I serve you today?”

    (The customer and his wife proceed to order. They order a lot of food. The customer has a thick French accent, and I have to ask him to repeat a few things.)

    Customer: “How long is this going to take?”

    Me: “Well, we’re kind of busy; it will take about 15 minutes.”

    (I begin repeating the order back to the customer to verify that it’s right, but he pulls ahead while I’m still speaking. About 15 minutes later, he pulls up to the window. My coworker brings them their food when it is ready.)

    Coworker: “All right, so I have [order] for you.”

    Customer: “No, that’s wrong. We wanted [order].”

    (My coworker is fairly new, so I decide to take over. I send the revised order to the kitchen and ask them to remake it. Five minutes later, the order is done.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Here is your order.”

    Customer: “That’s not all; we want milkshakes, too.”

    (I am very frustrated with this customer, but I keep it under control and ring up the milkshakes. I took five years of French class in high school, so I can understand it fairly well.)

    Customer: *to wife, in French* “This place is terrible.”

    Customer’s Wife: “It’s so slow!”

    Customer: “And that skinny white boy is very rude.

    Customer’s Wife: “Don’t be mean; he’s probably not that smart.”

    (They laugh, and continue making fun of me. I finish making the milkshakes, and walk over to the window with a beaming, ear-to-ear smile.)

    Me: *in French* “Thank you for your business today.”

    (The man makes eye contact with me. His eyes are nearly bulging out of his head, as he realizes I have understood every word he and his wife said. I keep my eyes locked on his, and maintain my ghoulish grin.)

    Me: *in French* “It was a pleasure to serve you today.”

    Customer: *drops milkshakes in wife’s lap and accelerates away*

    Related:
    This Round He Lost (In Translation)

    A Drought Of Nice Customers

    | Palmerston North, New Zealand | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Food & Drink

    (We are having a really bad drought in the North Island at the moment, so we have some serious water restrictions. It’s the top of everyone’s mind, and everyone’s talking about it.)

    Me: *to customer at drive-thru* “That’ll be [total].”

    Customer: “Okay, here you go. Wow, it’s going to be another scorcher today, huh?”

    Me: “I know, I’m just about to go do a rain dance.”

    Customer: “I know how you feel. We’re on tank water, and it’s running a little low for us.”

    Me: “Well, in town we’ve just got all the regular restrictions; we’re not watering and stuff. My mum’s so upset; she’s lost her entire veggie garden because she can’t water during the day.”

    Customer: “That must be pretty hard on her. We’re doing okay, because we’ve been so careful and everything.”

    (My coworker hands me her meal, and I hand it straight out.)

    Me: “Here you go, all done!”

    Customer: “Wow, that was fast! Thanks!”

    (I think she’s about to drive away, so I move to shut the window.)

    Customer: “Hang on! Can I see your manager, please?”

    (Confused, I grab the manager on the floor.)

    Manager: “Is there a problem?”

    Customer: “I just wanted to tell you how lovely it is to get a pleasant employee at the drive-thru window. This young lady has been talking to me the entire time I was here, and it made the time absolutely fly. You so rarely get pleasant people in the service industry. I just wanted to say how nice she was. Thank you, and have a good day!”

    (With that, she drives off. My manager gives me a thumbs-up, and I feel good the rest of my shift. Sometimes you get some good ones!)

    A Hot Slice Of Kindness

    | Boston, MA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink

    (I am working at a pizza shop on a busy Friday night. There are about five customers waiting in line. I hand the first customer her slice, and move on.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, I don’t like the slice I ordered. I want a new one.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; but I can’t just give you another slice.”

    Customer: “But I don’t want this one anymore! I demand to speak to who is in charge. How am I supposed to eat something I don’t like?!”

    (I ask my boss, and he tells me to give her a free slice to avoid an argument. I get the customer a new slice, and am finally able to take care of the other customers. An hour later, my coworker hands me a hot chocolate.)

    Coworker: “Here, this hot chocolate is for you.”

    Me: “Oh, thanks!”

    Coworker: “I didn’t get it; one of the customers who was in here before works at the coffee place. He saw you deal with that difficult customer, so he brought you the hot chocolate for free.”

    (This small act of kindness made my entire night brighter. The next time I see him, he will be getting a free slice of pizza!)

    That Woman Has Some Balls

    | Dickson City, PA, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

    (My friend and I are at a Chinese buffet.)

    Me: “Hey, do you want to get those fried dough ball things before we go back to the table?”

    My Friend: “Yes! Thank you for the reminder!”

    (We walk over to where they’re located, and see a middle-aged woman making her way down the line. She’s at the tray of food next to the dough balls, so we stand back and let her finish what she’s doing.)

    My Friend: “I love the dough balls here!”

    (The woman looks up from what she’s doing, and stares at us. She reaches over and takes EVERY DOUGH BALL from the tray and puts them on her plate. She then runs away from the line. There were at least 13 dough balls on the tray.)

    Me: “I… I don’t know what just happened.”

    (A few people around us start to laugh. Thankfully the dough balls were restocked by the time we were done with our first plate of food, and we never ran into that woman again!)

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