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    Super Fries Me

    | Hawaii, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m working as a register for a fast food restaurant.)

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

    Customer: “I would like an extra large fries.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, we have discontinued the extra large fries, sir.”

    Customer: “Just dump the fries into an extra large cup and give it to me!”

    Me: “Um, let me go check with my manager if that’s all right.”

    (While he waits, the customer behaves oddly and starts doing a jig in front of the counter. My manager says to give the customer what he wants.)

    Me: “My manager has agreed to serve you the fries in an extra large cup.”

    Customer: “Thank you!”

    (I ring him up for an extra large soda, and then hand him the cup of fries with the lid on. He pays and inspects the cup.)

    Customer: “I also need you to put soda and ice cream in here. These fries are too dry!”

    Manager: *hesitantly* “Okay…”

    (My manager takes the cup, pours soda and dispenses some ice cream onto the fries, and hands him a fork and spoon as well. The customer walks over to a table and begins eating.)

    Customer: “This tastes funny! I want a full refund!”

    Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, I cannot do that—”

    (Suddenly, the customer throws the fork and spoon at us and spills some of his cup onto the counter trying to get it on me. He then goes outside and throws the cup into the window, splattering its contents everywhere, before storming off.)

    Just Mildly Stupid

    , | Rochester, New York, USA | Food & Drink

    (I’m taking a phone call for the pizzeria I work at. Everything is going fairly normal until the customer places an order for wings.)

    Me: “Okay, would you like you boneless wings or traditional wings?”

    Customer: “What’s the difference?”

    Me: “Well, traditional wings are bone-in and boneless wings don’t have bones in them.”

    Customer: “Whatever, I just want them mild.”

    Me: “Okay, would you like that in our mild BBQ or mild buffalo sauce?”

    Customer: “No, just mild.”

    Me: “We carry a mild BBQ and a mild buffalo. Which could I get for you tonight?”

    Customer: “No! I just want your traditional mild!”

    Me: “Okay, that’s one order of mild buffalo–”

    Customer: “NO! Just MILD!”

    You’ve Rubbed Me The Wrong Way

    | Aurora, Colorado, USA | Food & Drink, Money

    (A customer is ordering on drive-thru.)

    Me: “Anything else I can get for you today?”

    Customer: “Five thousand dollars?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I’m just a cashier, not a genie. Will that be all?”

    Customer: *defeated sigh* “Yes…”

    The Ire Of The Irish

    | Maryland, USA | Food & Drink, Geography

    (I’m Irish and am working in the States one summer, waiting tables at an Irish pub/restaurant. I’m serving a couple in their 30s.)

    Customer: “Where are you from?”

    Me: “I’m from Ireland.”

    Customer: “Where’s that?”

    Me: “It’s in Europe.”

    Customer: “Oh, you’re from another country! Your English is really good!”

    Burnt To Order

    | San Jose, CA, USA | Food & Drink

    Me: “And would you like white toast with that?”

    Customer: “No, I want black toast.”

    Me: “I don’t…I don’t think that exists, sir.”

    Customer: “BLACK TOAST.”

    Me: “Wheat it is, then, sir.”


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