July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

A Weebly Weird Conversation

, , | ON, Canada | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Musical Mayhem

(I am waiting in line at a fast food restaurant. The couple behind me, who looks to be in their late twenties, are discussing their orders.)

Guy: “Have you tried the bacon, mushroom and Swiss cheese burger?”

Girl: “Yeah, it wasn’t bad, but I’m not a huge fan of mushrooms.”

Guy: *starts singing super quietly* “Mushroom! Mushroom!”

Girl: *also super quietly* “It’s a snake! A snaaaaaake! A snaaaaake!”

Both: “Badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger!”

(They then go back to their conversation about various menu items, completely normal.)

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 2

| Henderson, SC, USA | Awesome Customers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Top

(I am out to breakfast with some friends from work.)

Me: “Excuse me, do you know if the cook uses milk to make the omelets or just eggs?”

Waitress: “Just eggs. Are you allergic to milk?”

Me: “No, but I am lactose intolerant and I forgot to bring my meds.”

(We all order our food. However, after the waitress leaves, I overhear someone from the table next to us asking for a manager.)

Another Customer: *loudly* “I want to complain about that waitress. I heard her interrogating that poor woman about her personal medical issues! I’m a doctor and I know you can’t just ask people about things like that! It’s against the law! She could sue you!”

Me: *to the other customer* “Excuse me, before things get out of hand here, I’m the person she’s talking about. First of all, our waitress asked if I had an allergy to milk. It was a good question considering I made a point of asking if some of your foods have milk in it. If I was really allergic, the kitchen would have to take extra precautions to avoid anaphylaxis. Secondly, there’s no such law that I know of unless you’re talking about the laws in place to protect your private health information from being accessed by other people without your permission. I don’t see how those would apply in this case.”

Another Customer: “What the h*** are you talking about? What are you, some kind of lawyer, smarta**?”

My Friend: “No, ‘doctor,’ she’s some kind of nurse.”

(We all pulled out our hospital IDs. The “doctor” shut up after that. The manager thanked us for clearing things up and left, and our waitress gave us a free round of cheesecake with a free lactose-free muffin for me!)

Related:
Why Nurses Should Rule The World

Demanding Bacon And Acting Like A Pig

, | Adelaide, SA, Australia | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Wild & Unruly

(I am working drive-thru just before close, and my dad and little sisters are waiting in the dining room for me to finish. My brother also works with me. A customer pulls up; I notice him and his friends are all drinking alcohol.)

Customer: “Can I please have a burger with bacon?”

Me: “Sure, that will be [price].”

(Customer pays and drives to the last window, which I let the manager know over the headset he is drinking and may want to inform the police. As this is my last car, I go and get changed and head home. I walk past the drive-thru window and start to head to the dining room.)

Customer: “Oi! You! I said I wanted f***ing bacon!”

(Clearly intoxicated, he gets out of his car and JUMPS through the drive-thru window with his beer and burger, where my manager and brother try and grab him. He smashes the beer over my manager’s head and into the fry station. My dad quickly calls the police and ambulance and grabs the guy. His friends drive off leaving him there, with my dad holding him down. Meanwhile, the manager has recovered and walks over to my dad.)

Manager: “Thanks, mate! You can have a free meal for your whole family next time you’re in here!”

Bright Makes Right

, | WI, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Top

(I am the drive-thru cashier on a slow day. Most of the few customers that have come through have been unpleasant or downright rude. During the early afternoon, a very cheerful customer comes through.)

Me: “Welcome to [store name]. What can we make for you today?”

Customer: “Hi! How are you today?”

Me: “I’m doing alright, thanks. You?”

Customer: “Wonderful! Can I have two waters and a [dessert item]?”

Me: “Alright, that’s [total] and I’ll see you at the window.”

(When the car pulls up, I see two teenage girls, both with big smiles on their faces. I hand them their water and take their money before handing them their treat. Before handing the treat out, the passenger leans forward and speaks up loud enough for the entire kitchen to hear.)

Passenger: “That’s for you guys, on us! Friend told us y’all were having a bad day; we wanted to cheer you up! Have a great day!”

(It worked! It totally made my whole day so much better!)

If They Were Loud Then Pigs Would Fly

| Layton, UT, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Top

(My two friends and I are customers at a popular nationwide diner chain. It is around 1 am, and we are seated near a corner table, where three loud, obnoxious diners are seated with a sleeping infant in an open carrier. I am seated with my back to them and my two friends and are, for the most part, successfully ignoring them and quietly talking amongst ourselves. The only other customers in the restaurant are two twenty-something’s seated at a small table directly across the aisle from us doing nothing but reading and trying to ignore the obnoxious diners who are using some fairly vulgar language as they complain about their days. Not surprisingly, their loud cursing wakes up their infant. A few moments later, I feel something hit the back of my neck.)

Me: *under my breath* “What the…” *reaching up to take the projectile off the back of my neck*

Friend: “What is that?”

Me: “…it’s bacon.”

(Thinking the increasingly-upset child behind me had grabbed something off the diner’s plate and accidentally thrown it my way as its parents tried unsuccessfully to calm it, I set aside the bacon from the table behind me and continued trying to ignore the loud diners behind us, as they did not directly address us after the bacon had hit me. Five or ten minutes pass.)

Loud female diner: *as she walks by our table* “THANKS FOR BEING LOUD!”

(Her two male friends both give us dirty looks as they pass us and walk towards the front register. We sit and stare in stunned silence. As the lady with the baby pays, we watch her rant to our exhausted waitress and pointing to us. When they finally leave, our waitress came over to us.)

Me: “What was that all about?!”

Waitress: “They apparently were blaming you for waking up their baby.”

Reading customer: “For what it’s worth, we didn’t even realize you guys were there until they yelled at you!”

Me: “You may want to watch out for them if they come back. They started throwing their bacon at me.”

Waitress: *stunned* “I hate the night shift.”

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