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    The Customer Is Sometimes Alright

    | Anaheim, CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Money, Top

    (I am at a sit-down restaurant at a theme park. A waitress comes up to me while I’m eating.)

    Waitress: “Are you finding everything alright, sir?”

    Me: “Yes, the food’s very good! Thank you for asking.”

    (As she is walking away, I realize I have only $20 in my wallet and no credit cards. I’m fairly young, so I don’t have a credit card and always pay in cash. Because the meal including tax is $19.05, I find out I only have 95 cents for a tip.)

    Me: “Excuse me, ma’am…I have a question.”

    Waitress: “Yes?”

    Me: “Am I supposed to tip you? Because, I don’t think I have enough money left. You see, I only have $20, and the meal I paid for left me with only 95 cents.”

    Waitress: *smiles warmly* “Oh, don’t worry about it. The tip is already included with the bill!”

    Me: “Really? I don’t have to give you any physical tips or anything like that? Because I really thought I had to give you one.”

    Waitress: “Don’t worry about it! Like I said, tips are already included with the bill. If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me! Please do enjoy your meal!”

    (She walks away with a smile on her face. A couple sitting in the table right next to me paid attention to the whole conversation.)

    Husband: “Hey, uh…excuse me, sir?”

    (I turn in their direction. He is leaning towards me with a few $1 bills in his hand.)

    Husband: “Here, take this. My wife and I overheard your conversation with your waitress. She was really nice and friendly, and we felt a little sorry when we also heard that you wanted to tip her but didn’t have the money. Please, do take this.”

    (I stretch out my arm and take their money. Using my thumb, I leaf through it and find out they are giving me $10 to tip my waitress. I am dumbfounded.)

    Me: “Why, that’s really kind of you sir, but I couldn’t. I wouldn’t!”

    (The husband shakes his head in a friendly sort of way, and pushes the money towards me.)

    Husband: “No, really, I do insist that you tip your waitress.”

    Me: “Thank you…thank you so much! How can I ever repay you?”

    Husband: “You don’t need to pay me back. Honest. You both really needed it.”

    (I finish my meal, and my waitress comes over to my table to get the bill.)

    Me: “Here, take this tip. I really do want you to take it! It came through the kindness of others.”

    (She turns to all three of us; apparently, she overheard our conversation.)

    Waitress: “Thank you! I’ll go get your bill and hope all of you have a wonderful night!”

    (She goes to get the bill and I pay for the meal, getting my last 95 cents as calculated.)

    Me: *to husband* “Please, I know it’s not much, but take this 95 cents.”

    Husband: *waves me off* “No, no, I can’t. Keep the change. You’ll never know when you’ll need those coins.”

    (I try again to give my change to him, but get the same reaction.)

    Me: “Well, I know this isn’t much as well, but please have my thanks, and have a great night!”

    (I wave to them as I leave the restaurant and they wave back. I still have that receipt to this day to remind me of the kindness a couple brought to me in a tight spot.)

    A Day Late And A Month Short

    , | Connellsville, PA, USA | Time

    (Note: our company sent out coupons a few months ago, and they expired June 3rd. A customer walks in and slaps the coupons down on the counter.)

    Customer: “I want to use this for my salad.”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, those expired at the 3rd of the month.”

    Customer: “NO! It says they expire June 32nd!”

    Me: “Sir, there is no June 32nd.”

    Customer: *glances at the coupon and then storms out of the building cursing*

    Asia: It’ll Amaze Ya

    | Texas, USA | Geography

    Customer: “Excuse me, miss, but can I ask you something?”

    Coworker: “Sure thing, sir.”

    Customer: “You’re Asian, yes?”

    Coworker: “Yes, sir.”

    Customer: “Which part of Asia are you from?”

    Coworker: “Oh, I’m from Thailand.”

    Customer: “What? You just told me you were Asian!”

    Coworker: “Yes, I am, sir. Thailand is part of Asia.”

    Customer: “No, it’s not!”

    Coworker: *stays silent*

    Customer: “Oh yeah, I remember now. Vietnam is that little island next to Korea!”

    The Stairway To Heaven Is To The Left

    | Springfield, MO, USA | Musical Mayhem

    (This occurs when I have just gotten off of work. I have my hair down, and I am waiting on my fiancé to come pick me up. I’m an almost 29-year-old female with a passionate love for music. I listen to a bit of everything. Today, I happen to be singing to Kashmir by Led Zeppelin.)

    Older Customer: “STOP SINGING THAT!”

    Me: “Sir?”

    Older Customer: “You are singing Led Zeppelin. You are too young to listen to that. It makes me SICK!”

    Me: “Watch me.”

    (I put in my ear buds, crank the volume up and continue singing along.)

    Older Customer: “Young people trying to live in OUR ERA!” *stomps off*

    To Bacon, Or Not To Bacon, That Is The Digestion

    | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Top

    (I am taking a table’s order.)

    Me: “Okay, sir. What can I get for you to eat?”

    Customer: “I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger, but if they add bacon to it, I don’t want bacon.”

    Me: “So, do you want a regular cheeseburger?”

    Customer: “No. I want my burger to have bacon on it. But if it comes with bacon, then I don’t want bacon.”

    (I have absolutely no idea what he is asking for, and all his friends seem to be as confused as I am.)

    Me: “Okay, just to make sure I am understanding you correctly, I am going to repeat what you are asking for.”

    Customer: “Okay.”

    Me: “You want a bacon cheeseburger, and if there is bacon on it, you don’t want the bacon.”

    Customer: “Right.”

    Me: “But you definitely want the bacon on the burger.”

    Customer: “Right.”

    (Now all his friends are laughing, and I have no idea what to say. Suddenly, the customer realizes what he’s been saying.)

    Customer: “PICKLES! Oh my God, I don’t want PICKLES on the burger!”

    Me: “Oh, thank God! I was starting to think I went crazy!”

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