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    Would You Like That For Her Or To Go

    , | Lindale, TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Love/Romance

    (I am in drive-thru, using a head set to communicate with customers. A male customer pulls up.)

    Me: “Hi, how are you?”

    Customer: “I’m doing well! How are you tonight?”

    Me: “I’m good! What can I get for you?”

    (The customer places his order, but has a question that I am unable to answer. So, my manager speaks into the headset to answer him.)

    Customer: “WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GIRL?!”

    Manager: “Sir, you’ll see her at the window.”

    Customer: “WELL, BUTT OUT OF OUR CONVERSATION!”

    (The customer pulls up to window.)

    Customer: “TELL YOUR BOSS TO LEAVE US ALONE!” *glares at the window*

    Me: “Um, yes sir…”

    Lying Doesn’t Sit Well

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Top

    (I’m clearing off the outdoor patio because we’ve stopped seating and our kitchen is closed. Three customers sit down at a table.)

    Me: “I’m sorry guys, but the outdoor seating is closed. Our kitchen and the dinning room are closed too, but the bar will be open till two.”

    Customers: *inaudible grumbling*

    Me: “Sorry, folks. ”

    (I clean off a few more tables. As I’m walking back inside, one of the men at the table stops me.)

    Customer: “I know you’re closed and all, but I’m just saying we were sat out here by a host. Maybe you guys should get your S*** together!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir? A host sat you without menus or silverware?”

    Customer: “Yes!”

    Me: “Do you know her name or what she looked like, sir? I’d like to talk to her.”

    Customer: *stumbling for words* “I don’t know…she—”

    Me: “…Especially since the last host was cut over an hour ago, and I’m the only server still on the floor. I must say I’m VERY curious who sat you.”

    Customer: “Well…F*** YOU!” *leaves with his friends*

    Me: “Have a nice night, guys!”

    Combo Incognito

    , | Texas, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Top

    (At this restaurant, they take your name when you order, and call it out when your food is ready to be picked up. I’m waiting with other customers for orders.)

    Cashier: “Jessica!”

    (No one comes forward.)

    Cashier: “Jessica? Is there a Jessica?”

    (Again, no one comes forward. Three more orders come out, and in between each, the cashier calls for “Jessica” again. Meanwhile, a customer who ordered before me has been standing right at the counter and is getting impatient.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, but these people who just got their orders got here after me. Do you have my order?

    Cashier: “What’s your name?”

    Customer: “Susan.”

    Cashier: “We don’t have any orders for Susan. What did you order?”

    Customer: “I got the #3 combo with a coke.”

    Cashier: “That’s what the order for Jessica has.”

    Customer: “Oh! I gave the name Jessica, but that’s not my name. I don’t like giving my real name.”

    Cashier: “You gave the name Jessica, but didn’t claim the order for Jessica?”

    Customer: “Well, it’s not my name!” *takes her bag and leaves*

    Related:
    Indecisively Incognito

    Some Sprinkles Come With Sergeants

    | CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Military, Top

    (At the restaurant where I work, my boyfriend is visiting me. He’s just gotten home from the army and is still in uniform. A customer approaches me.)

    Customer: *points at sprinkles* “Excuse me, there is ice in my ice cream!”

    Me: “Sir, those are sprinkles. You asked for rainbow sprinkles.”

    Customer: “They are too cold to be sprinkles, so they must be ice!”

    Me: “The ice cream is what’s making them cold, sir.”

    Customer: “You’re a liar, you b****! Get me your f***ing manager!”

    (Unwilling to take the customer’s abusive behavior, my boyfriend speaks up.)

    My Boyfriend: “Those are f***ing sprinkles, you a**hole! If you don’t like it, then just go home and make your own ice cream!”

    Customer: *quickly exits the restaurant*

    Manager: *to my boyfriend* “You should stop by more often! I’ll even pay you to handle these customers!”

    All You Can Elite

    | New Zealand | Food & Drink

    (I am a server at a buffet-style restaurant. Since the customers get the food themselves, I am there to seat them, clear their plates and assist with any problems.)

    Me: “Hi, welcome to [restaurant's name]. If you will please follow me, I’ll show you to your table.”

    (I take the family of four to their table and point out where to get plates and cutlery from as well as show them the general layout of the buffet.)

    Customer: “So, I’ll have the roast, some potato salad, and a coke.”

    Me: “Uh, sir, this is a buffet restaurant.”

    Customer: “Yeah, so?”

    Me: “There is no menu. You go to the buffet choose the food yourself. That’s the point of a buffet.”

    Customer: “Oh, I know. I just can’t be bothered waiting in that horrendous line!”

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