(I’m hosting and whenever I seat a table, I put an ‘X’ next to the server who got the table so that all the servers get the same amount of tables. Two women walk in.)
Me: “Hello, how many for you today?”
Woman 1: “Just the two.”
Me: *marking the next server* “Well, if you just want to follow me.”
Woman 2: “That wasn’t our name!”
Me: “What?”
Woman 2: “We didn’t have a reservation. That wasn’t us!”
Me: “Oh, I was just marking the server you’ll be having today.”
Woman 1: “Sorry, we just saw Date Night and they took someone’s reservation and almost died!”
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1,582 Thumbs Up!)
Customer: *walks up to the counter* “Hey, you guys forgot my fork and croutons!”
Me: “I’m sorry about that, ma’am. Here you are.”
Customer: “Well, don’t I get free food because you guys messed up?!”
Me: “You get a free fork and croutons.”
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2,082 Thumbs Up!)
(I overhear a tourist couple at breakfast one table over.)
Customer: “Every day! This coffee is never hot enough.”
Customer’s husband: “You’re just gonna have to get used to that. In these countries that use the Celsius scale, they boil their water at only 100 degrees.”
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3,070 Thumbs Up!)
(I am working as a bartender at a restaurant. The waitress has added a 15% gratuity because the party has been large and difficult to deal with.)
Customer: “Miss? What’s this ‘gravity’ crap?! I ain’t paying for no ‘gravity!’”
Waitress: *without missing a beat* “Ma’am, that’s what holds the food to your plate.”
Customer: “Oh, alright then.” *pays the check*
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4,621 Thumbs Up!)
Me: “Good afternoon.”
Caller: “I was there at lunch today and got take out. When I got home I realized I had a salad and not the wrap. Your staff obviously can’t get an order right. You better rectify this. I am not impressed at all.”
Me: “What did you order?”
Caller: “A caesar salad.”
Me: “But isn’t that what you got?”
Caller: “But I wanted the caesar salad wrap. You guys screwed up.”
Me: “We don’t have a caesar salad wrap. Did you tell the cashier that you wanted a wrap?”
Caller: “You have caesar salad wraps, so she was pretty stupid if she didn’t know what I wanted.”
Me: “We have a roma chicken wrap with caesar dressing and feta. Is that what you wanted?”
Caller: “Well, your business is pretty stupid if you call a salad a caesar salad but don’t call a wrap that when you have one. I expect to be compensated for your stupidity.”
Me: “So you want to be compensated because you ordered the wrong item and our staff didn’t tell you that you really wanted something else?”
Caller: “Well…yes!”
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2,687 Thumbs Up!)
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