With No Bacon, Comes No Responsibility

, | WI, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I work at a burger joint. I’m working on making burgers, when a woman marches up and tosses her burger on the counter. I look up from my work as one of my coworkers moves over to her.)

Coworker: “Is there a problem, ma,am?”

Woman: “Yes, I ordered a bacon double cheeseburger. This doesn’t have bacon.”

(I know for a fact it does, as I was the one who made it. I also noticed she un-wrapped it, but didn’t bite into it or take it apart. My coworker signals for me, and I walk over.)

Me: “I’m sorry; I’m the one who made this. I’m sure I included bacon. Could you please check?”

(We do this so customers can’t complain if we handle their food after it’s already been made and given to them.)

Woman: *sigh* “Isn’t that your job?”

Me: “So you’re giving me permission to re-handle your food?”

Woman: “What do you think?!”

Me: “All right.”

(I open the burger up, and sure enough, there’s bacon there.)

Woman: “I want to see your manager.”

Me: “Sure, but may I ask why?”

Woman: “You ruined my burger; you shouldn’t have taken it apart to show me the bacon.”

Me: “…I’ll go get her now.”

(I got an official write-up for this! I’m sorry I was supposed to give customers x-ray vision, and have it myself.)

Noodling Around The Options

| ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Money

(Our restaurant has some pretty popular combo dinners. Some people like to change some of the dishes in them. If the dish they want to substitute is close in price to the original, it’s no problem; however, if they want a more expensive dish, we do charge for the difference.)

Woman: “Yes, I want this dinner here, but what is this?”

Me: “The chow mein? That’s mainly bean sprouts with chicken, little bit of mushrooms.”

Woman: *pulls a face* “No, no, I don’t want those. I’m looking for a dish with noodles. Can I do that?”

Me: “Sure, but there’ll be a small charge for the switch. What did you want in the noodles?”

Woman: “I want to keep the chicken, and maybe some vegetables.”

Me: “Okay, that’ll be a $3 charge.”

Woman: “What? Why?”

Me: “Well, the thing with the bean sprouts is a small plate, and it’s $6, while the one with the noodles is a bigger plate, and costs almost $9. It’s just the price difference in the dishes.”

Woman: *pulls another face* “No, that’s too much.”

(She proceeds to keep the bean sprouts, add a $4 dish to her order, and then wants to pay.)

Woman: “Is a $100 bill okay?”

Has No Steak In How It’s Cooked

| TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I am working in a steakhouse and taking the order for a teenage girl and her mother.)

Girl: “I’d like the six-ounce sirloin.”

Me: “All right, and how would you like your steak cooked?”

Girl: “Yes.”

Me: *pauses* “Um. How did you want it cooked?”

Girl: “Yes, I want it cooked.”

Me: “…but how, ma’am? Rare, medium, well done…?”

Girl: “Yes, cooked.”

Me: “Okay, well done, then. And for your sides…?”

Needs To Take A Pager From The Book Of Patience

| Woodbridge, VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Time

(I’m a hostess at a restaurant. Saturdays are our busiest days, and we are on a wait all day long. On this particular day, several of our tables just don’t want to leave, and our queue starts to run over.)

Guest: *storms in through the door* “How long do I have to wait?”

Me: “For how many, ma’am?”

Guest: “Four.”

Me: “Right now, the wait is about 45 minutes, but you’re welcome to go walk around the mall for about twenty minutes and check back in with your pager.”

Guest: *snatches pager from me* “Okay.”

Guest: *comes back ten minutes later* “How long do I have to wait?”

Me: “You still have about a half hour left.”

(The guest takes two steps back and stands in front of me the rest of the time. Her friends join her; she checks back in every few minutes. She is now seventh on the list. I page a couple people.)

Guest: *comes forward and shoves her pager in my face* “I’m next, yes?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I still have a few names in front of you. A few of our tables are sitting a lot longer than we expected, but as soon as they come available I will page for them.”

Guest: “This is ridiculous! I have been here over an hour!”

Me: *looks at the timer next to her name on my screen* “You’ve been here fifty minutes.”

Guest: *swings pager around* “But I got this over an hour ago!”

Me: “You got it fifty minutes ago.”

Guest: *pauses* “Well, that’s almost an hour.”

Me: *looks at her and gives a forced smile*

Guest: *glares at me the rest of the time until I page her*

(I pretended to be preoccupied with my screen not to notice. Her party ended up being five; she didn’t count her child.)

Getting It All In Español, Part 2

| CA, USA | At The Checkout, Language & Words

(A group of guys come in speaking Spanish, which I understand and speak fairly well. They shove the one white guy in the group forward to talk to me, the white hostess.)

Guy: *in English* “Hi, uh, can we get a table for eight, please?”

Me: *in English* “Sure thing. I think I have one cleared off, but let me go check for you.”

Guy: *in English* “Yeah, no problem.”

(I go to check the table. It is clear. When I get back, the guys are talking to the bartender in Spanish.)

Guy: *in Spanish* “The girl here was pretty cute, huh, man?”

Bartender: *in Spanish* “Yeah, she’s okay.” *looks at me, says in Spanish with an evil grin:* “Hey, white girl, is the table ready yet?”

Me: *in Spanish* “Yeah, it’s ready. Come on, guys.”

(The whole group blushed bright red. They were very polite to the staff the whole time and left us a great tip!)

Related:
Getting It All In Español

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