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    Twice The Cheese, Double The Effort

    , | Canada | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Money

    (I used to work at a small sandwich shop at which the manager and I were the only daytime employees. Our franchise serves shredded cheese on sandwiches, and customers often try to get us to put extra cheese on, since it’s more difficult to gauge the proper amount. The following happens during our regular lunch rush, as my manager and I are running back and forth, ringing people through and making their sandwiches.)

    Me: “And what kind of cheese would you like?”

    Customer #1: “Shredded.”

    (I measure out the proper amount with our scoop and put it on his sandwich.)

    Customer #1: “No, put more than that.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but this is our standardized amount. If you want more, you’ll have to pay for extra cheese.”

    Customer #1: “No, you didn’t put enough on. You need more than that.”

    (My manager has just finished ringing someone through and comes over.)

    Manager: “No, sir, I saw her measure it out. That is the standardized amount for a footlong sandwich.”

    Customer #1: “No. I need more cheese than that!”

    (This goes back and forth for a minute as I get to work on the next customer’s order, and finally my manager puts a full extra serving of cheese on.)

    Manager: “So that will be [amount] extra when you get to the till, then.”

    Customer #1: *mutters* “Well, put more than that on, then.”

    (My manager ignores him, and I finish making his sandwich and start punching it into the till.)

    Customer #1: “And I’m not paying for extra cheese.”

    Manager: “I gave you double cheese. Are you saying you would like me to give you free food?”

    Customer #1: “You didn’t put double cheese! You put a tiny bit extra.”

    Manager: “No. You received the regular, doubled, amount. Are you going to pay for it?”

    Customer #1: “No! You should have put more! I won’t pay for extra cheese.” *smiling smugly* “So, how much is it without extra?”

    (My manager raised her eyebrows at him, canceled the order, threw the sandwich in the garbage, and went back to help the next customer in line. He stood there speechless until the other customers started applauding. Then his face turned red and he stormed out, muttering that we lost “$30.00.” His sandwich was only worth about $8.00, even with the extra cheese.)

    Thinks She’s The Big Cheese

    | Canada | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I used to work for a large franchise, but at a small location at which we stopped serving shredded cheese on sandwiches for a while. During this period, a woman comes in with her two preteen sons, and everything is just fine until we get to the cheese.)

    Me: “And what kind of cheese would you like?”

    Customer: “Shredded, please.”

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, we don’t serve shredded on sandwiches.”

    Customer: “What? But I always have shredded.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but the shredded cheese is more expensive than the regular, and since we’re a small location, we need to save it to season our cheese bread.”

    (The customer is getting visibly angry now.)

    Customer: “This is ridiculous! I’ve walked out of stores without shredded cheese before! I’m a paying customer! You’re supposed to give me what I want!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m not allowed to serve shredded cheese. If you like, I can give you [two kinds of our regular cheese that are in the shredded cheese]. It’s basically the same thing, it just won’t be shredded.”

    Customer: “I CAN’T believe this. How hard is it to shred cheese?! I’ve walked out of stores before!”

    Me: “The cheese comes pre-shredded or pre-cut. I have no possible way of shredding the cheese here.”

    Customer: “I am a paying customer! That other cheese tastes like plastic! I should speak to your manager about this! I’m paying and I should get what I want!”

    (Suddenly, one of the customer’s sons, who has been looking increasingly uncomfortable, speaks up:)

    Customer’s Son: “Mom. It’s just CHEESE.”

    Customer: “I know but as a paying customer I should be getting what I want!”

    (She didn’t walk out, but she kept repeating that she was a “paying customer” through the whole transaction. Her poor sons looked like they wished the ground would swallow them up.)

    Sandwiched Between The Bad Days

    | CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

    (A customer has picked something up to go (that my coworker prepared) all the while complaining. Apparently she had ordered food from another diner by accident and was angry when we didn’t have her food ready for her. My coworker quickly took her order and got her the food. 10 minutes later the phone rings and I am closest to the front.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

    (My voice is very bubbly. In a fake bubbly voice the customer starts yelling.)

    Customer: “Well, hi, [My Name]! This is the customer who wanted a pastrami melt but who got a patty melt!”

    Me: “I am so sorry, ma’am. If you would like to come back I can give you refund?”

    Customer: “Oh, sure! Because I just love driving all over town! My husband and I are coming in and sitting down to eat!”

    (She hangs up. When she comes in, I decide to put her in my section so my coworker doesn’t have to deal with her anger. She immediately starts yelling and answers everything I say sarcastically while her husband watches on. I go to get her drinks and when I come back she looks embarrassed.)

    Customer: “I would like to apologize. My husband asked me if you were the one that had helped me before and when I said no he asked ‘well, what are you yelling at the girl for?’ I’m sorry.”

    (I was shocked. I told her not to worry, got her food out, was very attentive, and they left an excellent tip. I guess it goes to show that we all have bad days.)

    A Pulled-Teeth Burger

    | Milwaukee, WI, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I’m a cook at a diner with an open kitchen, but because we work with a skeleton crew, I often step onto the floor to help take orders. Today I stepped in to take an order for a man who came in alone.)

    Me: “Hello, how are you today?”

    (The customer doesn’t respond, and continues staring at the menu. After a few seconds, I continue.)

    Me: “Can I start you off with anything to drink today?”

    Customer: “Burger with fried onions and French fries!”

    Me: “And would you like anything to drink with that?”

    (The customer looks at me like I’m an idiot.)

    Customer: “Of course! A [Soda]!”

    (I proceed to enter and cook his order. After finishing his meal, the customer calls me over again.)

    Customer: “I’d like you to start that burger for my wife!”

    (No one had mentioned any burger to me, or the server.)

    Me: “Ummm, sure! What would she like on it?”

    (Customer stares at me again like I’m an idiot.)

    Customer: “You figure it out! You’re the d*** cook!”

    (It took me a few moments to comprehend what had just occurred. I was somehow, in my infinite capacity as a diner cook, to know what someone whom I’ve never met before wanted on their burger, and that I was at fault for not being able to do so. Utterly bewildered, I went back to the kitchen and called the server over.)

    Me: “Listen, I have no idea what’s going on, but the guy at B4 just placed a burger order for his wife, but won’t tell me what to put on it. Can you please find out?”

    (The server comes back almost ten minutes later, during which I had to take the remaining customers orders while cooking.)

    Server: “That was like pulling f****** teeth! Apparently she wants fried onions and mushrooms on it, no cheese.”

    Me: “What side?”

    (Server gets a look of horror on her face and looks over at the customer. She had forgotten to ask.)

    Server: “She wants fries. Give her fries.”

    The Brain Freeze Will Make No Difference

    | Calgary, AB, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (So I work at a college as a coffee server. I really wonder how some people made it this far. I am prepping a customers order. She turns to her friend.)

    Customer: “Do you want your double-double?”

    Friend: “No, thanks, I’m going to get an iced cappuccino.”

    Customer: “It’s below 10 out.”

    Friend: “Yeah, but I gave up caffeine for Lent, so I’m going to have an iced cap.”

    Customer: “You know there caffeine in that, right?”

    Friend: “Yes, in a HOT cappuccino. When you freeze it you kill the caffeine, so therefore it’s caffeine free. The sugar will keep me awake.”

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