November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Math Is Your Friend, Part 4

| Ohio, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “What’s the difference between the three fingers and finger fingers?”

Me: “Well, the three fingers comes with three chicken fingers, and the five fingers comes with five.”

Customer: “So, which one has more chicken?”

Me: “The five fingers.”

Customer: “Are the five fingers bigger?”

Me: “No, the chicken fingers are the exact same size. You just get two more with the five fingers.”

Customer: “This is too confusing! I’ll just have a cheeseburger.”

Math Is Your Friend, Part 3
Math Is Your Friend, Part 2
Math Is Your Friend

Clucks Can Be Deceiving

| Ohio, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “Hi, I just ordered sweet and sour chicken from your establishment, and one of my pieces of chicken is shaped like a fish.”

Me: “Well, the chicken is in all different shapes, ma’am.”

Customer: “So it’s not fish? It’s still chicken?”

Me: “Uh, yes.”

Customer: “Oh, OK!”

A Snake Eating Its Own Tail

, | Essex, VT, USA | Uncategorized

(It’s late at night and only one manager, another employee, and I are working. I’m manning the drive-thru when a car pulls up.)

Customer: *over speaker* “I just came through the drive-thru, and I got a fish sandwich.”

Me: “Okay, how can I help you?”

Customer: “There was a bite in my sandwich!”

Me: “I’m sorry? Please drive around and I’ll see what I can do.”

Customer: *at window* “What you can do, young lady, is get me a new sandwich.”

Me: “Um, sir, nobody here would have taken a bite of your sandwich. Are you sure it didn’t just break off?”

Customer: “NO! Give me a new sandwich! I just tasted this sandwich and it tasted terrible.”

Me: “Wait – you bit the sandwich after you found a bite?”

Customer: “No, you idiot! I bit the sandwich, and I need another one!”

Me: “…”

Old MacDonald Had A Meal

| Australia | Uncategorized

(I’m a waitress at a restaurant, and an elderly man just ordered a steak.)

Me: “How would you like your steak, sir?”

Customer: “Alive.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Alive. I want it alive.”

Me: “I’m not sure I get you sir – do you mean rare?”

Customer: “No. Alive! When I poke my fork in, it will have to say ‘MOO!'”

Me: “…I’m not sure we can arrange that for you, sir. It’s impossible.”

Customer: “You’re saying it’s impossible for you to bring a cow in here?”

Me: “That’s right, sir.”

Customer: “OK, I’ll have mine well done then.”

They Always Hunt In Packs

, | Minnesota, USA | Uncategorized

(I’m working at the fast food drive-thru with a particularly large group of cars in line.)

Customer: “It sure got busy all at once.”

Me: “Yeah, it happens like that.”

Customer: “You know why that is, right?”

Me: “No, tell me?”

Customer: “We wait around the corner until we have a group of about ten cars, and then we swarm all at once!”

(And from that day forward, everything made sense.)