Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Your Connection Is Totally Forked
    (2,151 thumbs up)
  • November Theme Of The Month: I Don't Work Here!
    Submit your story today!

    Singleminded

    , | Watertown, NY, USA |

    Me: “How can I help you today, sir?”

    Customer: “Yeah I’d like a pound of cajun chicken.”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir but we don’t carry cajun chicken, would you like some buffalo chicken in substitute?”

    Customer: “Which cajun chicken do you have?”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir but we don’t serve cajun chicken.”

    (My night manager is standing next to me. This guy goes on three more times, calm as can be, demanding cajun chicken.)

    Manager: “Sir…we don’t…would you like the santa fe chicken?”

    Customer: “I’d like the cajun chicken, where is your cajun chicken?”

    Me: *palmface*

    Manager: *slices santa fe chicken and wishes him a nice day*

    Even Bosses Have A Stupid Quota, Part 2

    | Newport, RI, USA |

    Customer: “Do you serve crab cakes?”

    Boss: “This is a hot dog stand.”

    Customer: “So do you sell crab cakes?”

    Boss: “We sell hot dogs, chips, and soda.”

    Customer: “So do you have crab cakes?”

    Boss: “No, we sell hot dogs, chips, and soda. Not crab cakes. Try a different stand.”

    Customer: “How can you not have crab cakes! This is Tall Ships! Everyone has crab cakes!”

    Boss: “Well, not us. Now there is an awful long line behind you so can you please move along?”

    Me: “Can I help the next person?”

    Customer: “HEY I AM THE CURRENT CUSTOMER! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHY YOU DON’T HAVE CRAB CAKES!”

    Me: “Look around you, sir. There are 7 people behind you, behind me there are people making hot dogs, sausage, and peppers. Behind you there is a crab cake stand. If you aren’t going to buy something other than hot dogs, please take your business somewhere else.”

    Customer: “I’M GOING SOMEWHERE ELSE! YOU PEOPLE HAVE NO MANNERS!” *storms off*

    Boss: “I don’t know what the hell was wrong with him, but if he talks to you like that again, I’m going to kick his a**.”

    Me: *happy I have an awesome boss* “Thanks.”

    Related Links
    Even Bosses Have A Stupid Quota

    Gluttony Or Gluttony

    | Bradford, UK |

    Customer: “Can I have the giant Yorkshire Pudding?”

    Me: “Sure, would you like it served with Beef or Pork?”

    Customer: “Yes, I’ll have beef or pork.”

    Me: “No, would you like Beef OR Pork?”

    Customer: “YES, beef or pork!”

    When In Rome (Or A Kosher Deli) …

    | Iowa, USA | Top

    (Keep in mind, this is a kosher deli.)

    Customer: “Can I get a ham sandwich, please?”

    Me: “Well, sir, we don’t serve ham.”

    Customer: “No ham? What do you have then?”

    Me: “Well, we have turkey, roast beef, corned beef, and pastrami…”

    Customer: “But no ham?”

    Me: “No, sir, no ham.”

    Customer: “What? Do you have a thing against ham or something?”

    Me: “Actually…yes, we do.”

    How Cows Order Coffee

    | Florida, USA | Top

    Me: “Good morning, how can I help you?”

    Woman: “Yeah, a small coffee with 2 splendas and extra milk.”

    Me: “Okay, that will be $1.49.”

    (She pays and I give her the change. I proceed to make the drink. I pressed the “Medium” button for milk and then gave an extra shot. When I gave it to her, she took a sip and made a face as if she had just taken a sip of liquefied dog s**t.)

    Me: “What seems to be the problem?”

    Woman: “I asked for extra milk! This is too strong.”

    Me: “Well, I’ll put some more in for you. No problem.”

    Woman, muttering under her breath: “Idiot kid…”

    (I put another “Medium” shot in. This is two mediums and one extra shot for a total of seven milks.)

    (She takes another sip, with the same face.)

    Woman: “What part of extra milk do you not understand?”

    Me: “I understand what extra milk means. I put in about four times the regular amount of milk.”

    Woman: “Well, put more!”

    (I put in more. I put a “Large” shot of milk (four more). This brings our total to 11 milks, therefore being classified as milk with a little coffee.)

    Me: “Here.”

    (She takes another sip, and yes. Again, she makes that freaking face.)

    Woman: “Look. Extra milk means you put in the regular amount, and then you put in MORE.”

    Me: “I know that! That is a SMALL coffee with 11 MILKS!”

    Woman: “PUT IN MORE!”

    (I put in more another “Medium” shot (three more)).

    Me: “Here. The coffee is almost white now.”

    (She drinks it again and SPITS IT ALL OVER THE COUNTER.)

    Me: “Lady, what’s your problem?”

    Woman: “This coffee is cold! I ordered a hot coffee, not a cold coffee! Can you comprehend that?”

    Me: “F**k this. Who’s next?”

    (My shift leader was laughing in the corner the whole time. She remade this lady’s drink with one large shot of milk and gave it to her. She sipped it…”Ah, now that’s better!”)

    (Everyone in line had a pretty good laugh about it.)

    Page 218/228First...216217218219220...Last