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    Sorry, Mom And Dad

    | Norcross, GA, USA |

    Regular at store: “Hey, I have a question.”

    Me: “Ok, what can I help you with.”

    Regular: “Do y’all have homeless people come in here often?”

    (Indicates couple reading news paper in the corner. I can’t see their faces.)

    Me: “Umm, no. Why?”

    Regular: “Oh, they just came in sat down like they wanted no one to see them and took your newspaper.”

    Me: “Well I can’t ask them to leave unless they are bothering you. Do you want me to ask them for the newspaper? I can since they aren’t paying cust–”

    Regular: “Oh no, I was just wondering if homeless people came in here often.”

    (I look back to the corner again and I can see their faces now.)

    Me: “Um, sir, those are my parents.”

    (He did not come back for about six months.)

    A Rose By Any Other Name, Part 2

    | Mississippi, USA |

    Customer: “Do you serve boneless wings?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, we do.”

    Customer: “Ok, then that’s what I’d like to order.”

    (I bring the customer her meal.)

    Customer: “Here are your boneless wings, ma’am. Enjoy.”

    Customer: “This isn’t what I ordered.”

    Me: “These are the boneless wings your ordered ma’am.”

    Customer: “No, these are chicken tenders. I want boneless wings.”

    Me: “Ma’am, boneless wings are basically chicken tenders.”

    Customer: “No, I want chicken wings with no bones!”

    Me: “Yeah…those don’t exist.”

    Related:
    A Rose By Any Other Name

    If You Have To Ask, You’ll Never Know

    , | Canada |

    (A lady walks into the cafe, i just happen to be standing by the counter with my coworker.)

    Woman: “I’ll have *order* please”

    Coworker: “Okay, that’s $1.47.”

    (I make the coffee.)

    Woman: *leans in and whispers to me* “Excuse me?”

    Me: “Yes?”

    Woman: “What exactly is an ‘Emo’?”

    My, Aren’t We Feeling Entitled Today?

    | Maine, USA |

    Customer on phone: “I’d like a delivery please.”

    Me: “Sorry, we don’t deliver.”

    Customer: “I thought you delivered.”

    Me: “Sorry, we don’t.”

    Customer: “Well, do I get some kind of compensation?”

    Me: “Uhhh, no…”

    Customer: “You mean I was inconvenienced for all this time and I don’t even get a f***ing discount?”

    Me: “No…”

    Customer: *click*

    Singleminded

    , | Watertown, NY, USA |

    Me: “How can I help you today, sir?”

    Customer: “Yeah I’d like a pound of cajun chicken.”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir but we don’t carry cajun chicken, would you like some buffalo chicken in substitute?”

    Customer: “Which cajun chicken do you have?”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir but we don’t serve cajun chicken.”

    (My night manager is standing next to me. This guy goes on three more times, calm as can be, demanding cajun chicken.)

    Manager: “Sir…we don’t…would you like the santa fe chicken?”

    Customer: “I’d like the cajun chicken, where is your cajun chicken?”

    Me: *palmface*

    Manager: *slices santa fe chicken and wishes him a nice day*

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