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    Just Mildly Stupid

    , | Rochester, New York, USA | Food & Drink

    (I’m taking a phone call for the pizzeria I work at. Everything is going fairly normal until the customer places an order for wings.)

    Me: “Okay, would you like you boneless wings or traditional wings?”

    Customer: “What’s the difference?”

    Me: “Well, traditional wings are bone-in and boneless wings don’t have bones in them.”

    Customer: “Whatever, I just want them mild.”

    Me: “Okay, would you like that in our mild BBQ or mild buffalo sauce?”

    Customer: “No, just mild.”

    Me: “We carry a mild BBQ and a mild buffalo. Which could I get for you tonight?”

    Customer: “No! I just want your traditional mild!”

    Me: “Okay, that’s one order of mild buffalo–”

    Customer: “NO! Just MILD!”

    You’ve Rubbed Me The Wrong Way

    | Aurora, Colorado, USA | Food & Drink, Money

    (A customer is ordering on drive-thru.)

    Me: “Anything else I can get for you today?”

    Customer: “Five thousand dollars?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I’m just a cashier, not a genie. Will that be all?”

    Customer: *defeated sigh* “Yes…”

    The Ire Of The Irish

    | Maryland, USA | Food & Drink, Geography

    (I’m Irish and am working in the States one summer, waiting tables at an Irish pub/restaurant. I’m serving a couple in their 30s.)

    Customer: “Where are you from?”

    Me: “I’m from Ireland.”

    Customer: “Where’s that?”

    Me: “It’s in Europe.”

    Customer: “Oh, you’re from another country! Your English is really good!”

    Burnt To Order

    | San Jose, CA, USA | Food & Drink

    Me: “And would you like white toast with that?”

    Customer: “No, I want black toast.”

    Me: “I don’t…I don’t think that exists, sir.”

    Customer: “BLACK TOAST.”

    Me: “Wheat it is, then, sir.”

    Bananas Explodé

    | Brussels, Belgium | Food & Drink

    (I’m preparing bananas flambé in front of several customers. Suddenly, one of them speaks up excitedly.)

    Customer: “Wow, that looks so cool! Are you using gasoline?”

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