The Medium Suddenly Felt Very Small

, | Daytona Beach, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I am a customer waiting in line at a popular fast food restaurant’s drive thru. I am next to place my order, and behind a large black SUV with a middle-aged blonde soccer mom type in the driver’s seat, another person in the passenger’s seat, and what must be her son in the back seat. She places the order for the son and begins to give her order.)

Mother: “I’d like a #4.”

Cashier: “And what size would you like that?”

Mother: “Medium.”

Cashier: “Okay, and what to drink?”

Mother: “Medium.”

Cashier: “I’m sorry, what would you like to drink?”

Mother: “MEDIUM!”

Cashier: “Miss, I’m sorry, I just want to know what you would like your beverage to be today.”

Mother: “MEDI—”

(At this point I have had more than enough, as I detest people who don’t listen when ordering and treat food service employees like they are lesser. I stick my head out the window and shout at the top of my lungs.)

Me: “SHE’S ASKING WHAT YOU WANT TO DRINK, YOU IDIOT!”

(The mother sticks her head out her window as well to glare at me, when she notices my gleaming, freshly shaven bald head, large beard, and scowl barely covered by my sunglasses. She turns back to the speaker and meekly replies…)

Mother: “A Diet Coke, please.”

(After I give my order, actually giving the size and beverage without needed to be prompted, I pull up to pay.)

Cashier: “Oh, my God, thank you. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that!”

Me: “Don’t worry. For a long time I used to work in restaurants. I’ve wanted to do that forever, too!”

Take Your Hat Off To Their Detective Skills

| UK | Criminal/Illegal, Holidays

(A customer has been telling me about all the break-ins recently over Christmas, and how a lot of houses have been robbed in the village.)

Customer: “Yeah, the police told us that a CCTV camera caught some young guy wearing a woolly hat.”

Me: *looks up at customer who is wearing woolly hat*

Customer: *quickly snatches hat off his head* “Oh, my, it’s not me. NOT ME!”

Deep Fried Attitude

, | AZ, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Technology

(I am working in the drive-thru during a busy breakfast rush when a snooty customer pulls up.)

Customer: *taking her food and shakes it* “How many calories is this? The girl on headset said you were going to find that for me!”

(We have the calorie count for practically every item in a program on our registers – right down to a single slice of cheese – so despite the massive line, I quickly check. For some reason, while we have the nutritional information for the breakfast sandwich as a whole, we don’t have the information on just the chicken filet, which is all she ordered.)

Me: “I’m really, sorry, but for some reason we don’t have it in our system. I know that if you go on the company website, though, they will have it under the ‘nutrition guide’ tab and—”

Customer: *disgusted* “I shouldn’t HAVE to go online. You should have it HERE!” *drives away*

Manager: *waves at receding car* “You have a nice day, too!”

Me: “If she’s that concerned about calories, maybe she shouldn’t be eating fried chicken for breakfast?”

Manager: “Seriously!”

Overbooked Leads To Overcooked Attitude

| South Africa | Crazy Requests

(I am the owner of a family restaurant in the country and we are the only place open during the December holidays, and do get fully booked quite fast. A customer walks in 15 minutes before all our bookings arrive. We only serve 60 guests per night due to our small kitchen.)

Customer: “Good evening, Can I please have a table for 16 guests?”

Me: “No, unfortunately we are fully booked at this stage; we could however seat you at 20:30 or 21:00?”

Customer: “No, I don’t eat that late. Why can’t you just squeeze us in?”

Me: “I can do that, but if I do seat 16 of your guests with our other 60, then it’s just a recipe for disaster. As I said, I am more than happy to accommodate you when it has quieted down, at around 21:00.”

Customer: “No. You are a restaurant and you have to serve me!”

Me: “I am sorry, sir; we are fully booked.”

Customer: *to waiter* “I am never coming back here again! This is f****** ridiculous. I will tell all my friends and family that you don’t want to serve guests.”

Me: “Excuse me? I don’t understand. We are fully booked and can not serve you at this stage.”

Customer: “Who is the owner? I want to speak to the owner right now!”

Me: “I am the owner, sir, and as I explained to you I can not serve 16 guests on top of my other 60.”

Customer: “Well, you won’t be an owner for long!”

Me: “Well, then I wouldn’t have to deal with customers like you.”

(Customer left, still swearing, and eventually posted a complaint on a review website, to which the locals of the town ripped his comments a new one.)

Lack Of Burger Flippers Makes Her Flip

, | Springfield, IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work in a major Chinese food chain that has just opened up in the area, right around Christmas time. The store is incredibly busy, both inside, and in the drive through. The wait time for both is long. We time the drive through at about 15 minutes. A lady gets up to the ordering area, after waiting in line all that time and says:)

Customer: “You don’t have any cheeseburgers?”

Me: *politely* “Uh… no, ma’am. We only serve Chinese food.”

Customer: “But you are a DRIVE-thru! You should have cheeseburgers!”

(She was not able to drive off angrily, because of customers still in front of her waiting to pay and pick up their food. When she was able, she gunned it and took off! She probably wasted half an hour.)

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