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    In Hot Water Now

    | Canada | Criminal/Illegal

    (I work at a swimming pool. One of our regular customers is standing at the payphone and glancing at me every so often. He picks up the receiver, but doesn’t put money in. He then moves his mouth like he’s talking, still checking on me. I’m suspicious he’ll try to sneak in, so I step out of his view. Sure enough, I hear his footsteps.)

    Me: *coming back into view* “Hi, sir! Here to use the hot tub?”

    (The customer grumbles and throws his admission fee at the counter.)

    Me: “You enjoy it!”

    (I smile at him brightly despite his dirty look.)

    Battle Of The Sexists

    | West Midlands, England, UK | Bigotry, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

    (I am a male part time cleaner at my local leisure centre. One of my duties is to clean the toilets in reception. It is currently busy in reception, so I ensure that the female toilet is empty before putting up a sign warning customers that cleaning is in progress. As I leave the toilet with my arms full with mops, bleach, and disinfectant etc, a female customer is standing outside the door waiting.)

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry; I didn’t realise you were waiting.”

    Customer: “What were you doing in there?”

    (I gesture to my arms that are full with cleaning products.)

    Me: “Just cleaning the area for you.”

    Customer: “But those are the female toilets!”

    Me: “I am aware of that, but it is part of my job to ensure all toilets are clean.”

    Customer: “But you aren’t a woman; you shouldn’t be in there!”

    Me: “There are no female cleaners on duty. I am the only cleaner here today, and the toilets need to be cleaned.”

    Customer: “Well that is unacceptable! Where is your manager? I am making a complaint!”

    (My manager is already in the reception area, so makes her way over.)

    Manager: “What is the problem?”

    Customer: “This man was in the female toilets.”

    Manager: “Well, the area does need to be cleaned regularly, and he is our cleaner.”

    Customer: “I don’t give a d*** what his job is! He should not be in the women’s toilets.”

    Manager: “So, your complaint is that we have a male employee in the women’s toilets?”

    Customer: “D*** right it is!”

    Manager: “Would you rather the toilets were not cleaned?”

    Customer: “No, that would be stupid! Just get a woman cleaner!”

    Manager: “Then who would clean the male toilets?”

    Customer: “She can! But this pervert should be fired for going into the women’s toilets.”

    Manager: “But, wouldn’t that make her just as bad as him?”

    Customer: “Oh, you are just being awkward now! P*** off and leave me alone!”