This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 10

| USA |

(I am taking a delivery order.)

Me: “And how will you be paying tonight? Cash or credit?”

Caller: “Credit.”

Me: “What type of card is it?”

(The caller states the name of her bank.)

Me: “No, ma’am. I meant is it a Visa, MasterCard?”

Caller: “Oh, Visa.”

Me: “The number?”

Caller: “What number do you want?”

Me: “The big one on the front.”

Caller: “Oh, really. All of it?”

(She provides twelve numbers.)

Me: “I need four more numbers.”

Caller: “Oh, sorry. I didn’t see them there. 1234.”

Me: “Okay. And the expiration date?”

Caller: “Where do you find that?”

Me: “The bottom right corner.”

(A few seconds of silence pass.)

Caller, talking to someone else: “Find the expiration date for me.”

(She finally finds it and gives it to me. I arrive with her order, and hand her the credit card receipt. She turns to her friend, and hands it to her.)

Caller, to her friend: “Sign this for me. I don’t know how.”

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 9
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 8
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 7
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 6
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 5
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 4
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 3
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 2
This Is Why We’re In A Recession

Deliver Us From Stupidity

| Tempe, AZ, USA |

Me: “Hi thank you for calling [pizza chain]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I ordered a pizza two hours ago and it still hasn’t arrived.”

Me: “I am sorry about that, sir. Can I get your phone number? We can see what happened.”

(The customer gives me the phone number.)

Me: “I’m sorry sir, but it appears your order was placed for carryout.”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t understand what that means.”

Me: “Well, it means you need to actually come down to the store and pick it up.”

Customer: “Oh, I thought it meant you would carry it out to me.”

Me: “No sir, that would be delivery. Would you like me to switch it to delivery for you?

Customer: “What does that mean?”

Stone Baked Goodness

| California, USA |

(I answer a phone call from an obviously high customer.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [store]. Will this be for dine in, take out or delivery?”

Customer: “Do you guys have any specials?”

Me: “Yes, right now we have an extra large pepperoni pizza for $12.99.”

Customer: “Woah! That’s a great stoner pizza! Wait, did I say that out loud?”

Me: “No, sir.”

Customer: “Awesome!”

A Sign That Tells The Future Is A Sign

, | Chapel Hill, NC, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

(A customer comes in and orders two large pizzas and tries to pay with a $100 bill.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but we can’t provide more than $20 in change.”

Customer: “What? Why not?”

Me: “It’s our policy.”

Customer: “Then you should have a sign up telling people that!”

Me: “Well, sir, if you look to your right you’ll see just such a sign.”

Customer: “You should have a sign that tells people before they get here!”

A Hot Slice Of Obvious

| Pocomoke, MD, USA | Food & Drink

Me: “Thank you for calling [pizza place], how can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, can I have a half pepperoni, half sausage?”

Me: “Okay, will that be all?”

Customer: “Could you make sure that both halves are on the same pizza?”

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