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    Really Fond-a Of Rhonda

    | Cleveland, OH, USA | Extra Stupid

    Receptionist: “Hi, this is (company). May I direct your call?”

    Caller: “Yeah, I need to speak to Rhonda.”

    Receptionist: I’m sorry, but we don’t have anyone here by that name.”

    Caller: “RHONDA! RHONDA! I need to talk to Rhonda!”

    Receptionist: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but there is no one here named Rhonda. What department were you trying to reach?”

    Caller: “The newsletter girl! I want to talk to Rhonda!”

    Receptionist: “Oh, Sue is in charge of the newsletters. I can transfer you to her right now.”

    Caller: “Why did she change her name?!”

    The Wall Of Somebodies

    | California, USA |

    (I work at the front desk of an office. Note that we have pictures of our founder with celebrities on the wall. On this day, we have a guest waiting for one of our executives. He examines the celebrity pictures while he waits.)

    Guest: “Who are these people? Are they former employees?”

    Me: “No, they are celebrities.”

    (The guest looks at the pictures, which include Whitney Houston, Clint Eastwood, and Al Gore.)

    Guest: “Huh, I don’t think I’ve heard of them…”

    Is This A Stupid Drill

    | Pueblo, CO, USA |

    (I work in an office for accounts receivable that takes payments, sets up payment agreements, etc. One night, I am working late on the fourth floor with a customer on the line when the building’s fire alarm goes off for a scheduled routine drill.)

    Me: “Okay sir, your payment just went through. Your confirmation number is–”

    Customer: “What’s that noise?”

    Me: “It’s our fire alarm. They’re going to start clearing the building for a drill, so I need to give you this number quickly.”

    Customer: “Is your building on fire?”

    Me: “No, sir. It’s just a scheduled drill. Your confirmation number, if you’re ready, is–”

    Customer: “Should I call the fire department?”

    Me: “No, sir. It’s a drill. The building is not on fire.”

    (I finally manage to give him his number and am finishing up the call.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling finance, sir. Have a good evening.”

    Customer: “You, too! Don’t burn to death!”

    A Report, A Memo, A Notification

    | Orange County, CA, USA |

    Me: “Good morning, this is [name] at [company]. How may I help you?

    Caller: “May I please speak to [co-worker]?”

    Me: “He is not in the office today. May I take a message?”

    Caller: “No, I just wanted to confirm if he got my email. Can you have him call me and let me know?”

    Me: “Of course, may I get your name and phone number?”

    (The customer proceeds to give me a phone number, the spelling of her name, and a detailed message.)

    Me: “Okay, I have everything. I’ll be sure to give him your message as soon as possible.”

    Caller: “No! I didn’t want to leave a message. I just want him to call me back.”

    Me: “But you do want me to tell him it’s regarding your email, correct?”

    Caller: “Yes! And don’t forget to let him know about the change in time.”

    Me: “Okay, I’ll give him the message.”

    Caller: “I’m not leaving him a message! I just want you to give him that information!”

    Blind-siding Stereotypes

    | San Francisco, CA, USA |

    (I work at a start-up company in a very small office space that used to be a window shades store. We occasionally get people knocking on the door looking for the old business. A gentleman knocks on the door and I talk to him.)

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “I bought these blinds, and they don’t fit my window.”

    Me: “Oh, you’re at the wrong place. That was the last tenant. This isn’t a shade store anymore.”

    Customer: “Oh, but in the phone book this is listed.”

    Me: “I know. He hasn’t updated it. We’re not a shade shop. I hope you get help with your problem.”

    Customer: “Well, you might be able to help. You’re a woman. Women put up blinds a lot.”

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