November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Bigots United

| MA, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(I am the assistant manager at a rent-to-own home goods company. Since payments pay for the week in advance there are no grace periods and, due to the customer base, repossessions are common. I am female, white, pagan, and lesbian. My boss is male, Cambodian, Buddhist, and an immigrant.)

Customer: *storms in* “You guys are racist! I’m gonna sue you all!”

Me: “Hi! How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Your truck showed up and took my s***! I want it back now or I’ll sue you f*** racists!”

Me: “Let me take a look at your account so we can figure out what is going on. What’s your name?”

Customer: “You know d** well what my name is! This whole store is a bunch of f****** racists.”

(Aside from myself and the manager we only have two other employees. One is male, Hispanic, and very Catholic, and the other is male, a very dark skinned Haitian, and practices voodoo. Between the four of us we represent four religions, four races, gay/straight, married/unmarried, young/middle age, male/female, etc… My manager comes out from his office.)

Manager: “Hello, what seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “You are all a bunch of racists and bigots. You sent your truck just to persecute me!”

Manager: “Sir, please calm down. We sent out truck because you have not been in to pay your bill in three weeks.”

Customer: “Bulls***! You sent it because you can’t stand someone like me to have nice things!”

(My truck guys are protective over me. They hear the commotion and come out of the back, standing behind me and the manager.)

Customer: “Give me my s*** back! I’m gonna call the cops and tell them what a bunch of f****** racists you are!”

Me: “We would be happy to return the items, sir. We just need you to catch your account up. With three weeks behind, and then the next week ahead, it makes four weeks total. That comes to—”

Customer: “Oh, H***, NO! I’m not paying that s***! You bunch of bigots! You are gonna give me back my s*** for FREE or I’m gonna sue!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. You need to catch up your account before we can re-deliver.”

Customer: “Listen here, you little b****! I know my rights! I’m gonna sue! You’re all a bunch of racists and bigots!”

Truck Guy: “Against what, exactly?”

(The customer finally paused long enough to look at us… in all of our cultural rainbow glory… then turned and walked out quickly!)

Colorful Employees

, | IL, USA | Bigotry, Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink

(I am the guest relations person, so I return calls from disgruntled customers all the time. The restaurants are fast food and all have drive thrus.)

Customer: “Did you know you have gang members hanging around your [Location] restaurant?!”

Me: “No, sir, I did not. Have you spoken with the manager of the establishment about this?”

Customer: “I did and he laughed me off!”

Me: “I’m very sorry about that, sir. We ask that our manager’s take guest concerns seriously. Where are you witnessing gang members around the facility?”

Customer: “He should be able to see them. They are hanging out in your driveway there, all wearing the same clothes ALL THE TIME!”

Me: “How are they dressed?”

Customer: “They are wearing black shirts, khakis, and hats! They are always there until you guys close!”

Me: “Sir, you are describing our drive thru staff. They are wearing our uniform and stationed outside to take orders.”

Customer: “But they’re all black and Mexican!”

Me: “We are an equal opportunity employer and do not discriminate who we hire.”

Customer: “This is bulls***! I want to talk to your manager!”

Me: “Sir, you can talk to my manager if you’d like but you are describing our staff. They are not a gang and there would be nothing she would be able to do about it.”


(My manager explained the same thing I did and the customer screamed so loudly we hung up.)

Sharing A Story About Not Sharing

| CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Top

(A coworker is offering macaroons at work. He had never had them before but had bought a whole lot of them, and we get to hear the story of why he had bought them.)

Coworker: “There’s a cake shop near my house. I go there all the time, and there’s a regular customer I see there who is really mean. That day she said she was going to buy some macaroons and not share any with her grandkids. I was ahead of her in line, so when it was my turn, I said ‘I’d like to buy all your macaroons!.'”

Tripping About Shipping

| Monroe, CT, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Transportation

(I work in a factory office that sells school supplies around the country. We receive purchase orders via e-mail, regular mail, and fax. Most of the calls we receive tend to be about checking the status of deliveries and orders received.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How many I help you?”

Caller: “I would like to say that the way you shipped out my order is unacceptable and not according to what I requested in the fax. I demand to be compensated!”

Me: “Okay, I apologize for the inconvenience. May I have the purchase order number so I can look into it, please?”

Caller: “Yes, it’s [number].”

(Her account has several notations, mainly about reps trying to contact the customer about her order which has over $400 worth of goods. She requested in her fax that she wanted her order divided up into four separate shipments, one for each teacher that the goods are to go to. Company policy won’t allow us to do that as doing so will increase shipping costs. The last notation reads that a rep spoke with the school secretary and explained the company policy about shipments. She was advised she could choose to either have everything shipped together or she could fax separate purchase orders with each teacher’s name. The notes showed she chose the former option.)

Caller: “That’s unacceptable! I did not give permission to do that. You should have asked for me specifically.”

Me: “According to these notes, the rep did and got the secretary instead.”

Caller: “Sir! The secretary does not have permission to make changes to purchase orders. You should have asked for me! I should be compensated for this.”

Me: “With all due respect, ma’am, that’s not company error. The secretary should have told you what happened.”

Caller: “Don’t you think you should’ve told her to let me know?”

Me: “Ma’am, she’s your secretary! It should go without saying that if she gets a call about your order, if she makes a change to it she should let you know. It’s not our error if she doesn’t do that. I’m sorry, but according to these notes the rep did ask for you. He did explain the situation to the secretary and he asked her if she had authorization to make changes to the order. She said yes and the changes were made.”

Caller: “Well, I’m telling you now she should not have done that!! That rep should have asked for me specifically because the order is now ruined! It’s four other secretaries and I sorting out over six boxes of products that are scattered everywhere. It’s a complete mess that is taking too much time. I have to deal with all this aggravation because of your incompetence.”

Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way. As I explained before, company policy won’t—”

Caller: “I DON’T GIVE A F**** ABOUT WHAT YOUR COMPANY POLICY SAYS! I’m pissed the f**** off!”

Me: “Ma’am, there’s no need to yell and raise your voice like that. Please be advised if you continue to use that language and tone this call will be disconnected.”

Caller: *scoffs* “This is so aggravating! I’m so upset. I should return everything and make you pay for the return shipment.”

Me: “Please be advised that we’re not going to do that as you placed this order out of your own volition. At no point in this phone call did you state you received incorrect merchandise. Also, be mindful that it would take more effort on your part to package everything up and return back versus you already going through the process of sorting out the merchandise.”

Caller: “This is nonsense! I should call the Better Business Bureau on you people and my secretary!”

Me: “You’re going to complain to the Better Business Bureau that we correctly filled your order, that your secretary did not inform you of our phone call, and the secretary that either you or your school hired didn’t do your job?”

(The caller let out a huge scream, then hung up. When I checked on the account later on in the day notes were left stating she spoke with a manager who told her the same thing.)

Not Worthy Of The Name

| TX, USA | Funny Names, Theme Of The Month

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company] Finance. This is Liz. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Who?”

Me: “This is Liz at [Company] Finance. Can I help you?”

Caller: “Stephanie, what kind of business is this?”

Me: “Well, this is LIZ, and we are a loan office.”

Caller: “Stephanie, I need a liability quote for a vehicle.”

Me: *facepalm*