When Photos Are Exposed

| Seattle, WA, USA | Extra Stupid, Liars & Scammers, Uncategorized

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am. We do not allow the use of photography in the museum.”
 
Guest: “I wasn’t taking a photograph!” *shows me her phone*
 
Me: “Sorry, the way you were holding your phone looked as if you were taking a photograph. Although not only did you take a photograph, but you saved it as your cell phone wallpaper and are currently showing it to me.”

Spaced Out

| New Mexico, USA | History, Math & Science

(I work in the astronomy section of my local natural history museum, which features several large NASA photos. A visitor approaches me and points at a picture of an astronaut doing a spacewalk.)

Visitor: “What is that astronaut doing?”

Me: “Oh, he’s doing a spacewalk.”

Visitor: “You can walk…in space?!”

Me: “Well, no. They just sort of float there while tethered to the spacecraft. They only do it when they need to exit the shuttle to do repairs.”

Visitor: “Oh…” *points at a photo of Apollo 11 launching* “What’s that?”

Me: “That’s Apollo 11 launching to put the first humans on the moon.”

Visitor: “Oh…why didn’t they just build a big ladder?”

When Flippers Attack

| UK | Family & Kids, Pets & Animals, Uncategorized

Child: “Mum, what’s that?” *points to dolphin skeleton*

Mother: “That’s a dolphin, dear. It eats people.”

No Faith In Science

| Canberra, Australia | Uncategorized

Child: “What’s the Cretaceous period?”

Mother: “Something scientists made up.”

Me: *chiming in* “It’s the third period that the dinosaurs lived in. It was from about 140-65 million years ago.”

Child: “Really?”

Mother: “The Cretaceous period is just something that scientists made up to dispute Christ.” *turns to face me* “But we won’t get into that.”

Very Old Lang Syne

| United Kingdom | Family & Kids, Uncategorized

(I work in a museum in Scotland, where I do activity sessions for young children. I am showing them some artifacts that were originally brought to Scotland by the Romans.)

Me: “These were brought to Scotland around 2000 years ago by an invading army. Who do you think this could’ve been?”

Child: “Hitler!”

Me: “Well, it was a bit early for Hitler.”

Child: “Robert Burns!”

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