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    Be Careful What You Ask For, Part 3

    | Beaverton, OR, USA |

    Me: “What can I get for you?”

    Customer: “I want a small popcorn, and don’t try to upsell me a medium!”

    Me: “Can I interest you in a large then?”

    Customer: “I want to speak to your manager.”

    Related:
    Be Careful What You Ask For, Part 2
    Be Careful What You Ask For

    Shameless

    | Kennewick, WA, USA |

    Customer: “How much is a large popcorn and large drink?”

    Me: “That would come to $11.50.”

    Customer: “S***! That’s f***ing highway robbery, man! How do you sleep at night?”

    Me: “Sir, I work on my feet for 8-hour shifts at minimum wage. I don’t even buy concessions at the movies because they’re so freaking expensive and they don’t pay me enough here to turn around and spend my paycheck back on them.”

    Customer: “Good point. I’ll have a medium popcorn and medium soda, please.”

    Me: “Would you like to up-size those to larges for just 50 cents each?”

    Dumb, Dumberer And Dumberest

    | Anchorage, AK, USA |

    (I’m waiting in the movie ticket line and overhear three teenage girls having a conversation.)

    Girl #1: “What is the mat-in-ee?”

    Girl #2: “That’s like, a sea creature, right?”

    Girl #3: “OMG, you are so stupid! Its like when you get a discount because your dad is, like, in the military or something.”

    Girl #1: “OMG, I’m so stupid!”

    Girl #3: “Yeah, you should pay more attention to your surroundings!”

    When Customers Attack, Part 2

    | Mississauga, Ontario, Canada |

    Customer: “Yeah, can I get extra butter?”

    Coworker:: “Actually the butter is self-serve on the sides of concession. You can help yourself, ma’am.”

    Customer: *suddenly angry* “WELL IF YOU’RE NOT GOING TO HELP ME I WON’T COME BACK NEXT TIME!”

    Coworker:: “Please don’t hurt me!”

    Related:
    When Customers Attack

    We Have No Power, Starring Samuel L. Jackson

    | Cincinnati, OH, USA |

    (During a major power outage that left all of Cincinnati in the dark for days, a woman calls the theater asking about movie times.)

    Customer: “Hi, what movies do you have playing today?”

    Me: “None, we don’t have electricity.”

    Customer: “And what time does that start?”

    Me: “Ma’am, we aren’t open.”

    Customer: “That’s too early, what else you got?”

    Me: “NO MOVIES ARE SHOWING TODAY!”

    Customer: “I heard that was no good.”

    Me: “We can’t show movies because we have no power!”

    Customer: “Is that the movie with Samuel L Jackson?”

    Me: *gives up* “Yes, ma’am. It starts at 6pm but you might want to be here early because it gets crowded this time of day.”

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