Be Careful What You Ask For, Part 3

| Beaverton, OR, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “What can I get for you?”

Customer: “I want a small popcorn, and don’t try to upsell me a medium!”

Me: “Can I interest you in a large then?”

Customer: “I want to speak to your manager.”

Related:
Be Careful What You Ask For, Part 2
Be Careful What You Ask For

Shameless

| Kennewick, WA, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “How much is a large popcorn and large drink?”

Me: “That would come to $11.50.”

Customer: “S***! That’s f***ing highway robbery, man! How do you sleep at night?”

Me: “Sir, I work on my feet for 8-hour shifts at minimum wage. I don’t even buy concessions at the movies because they’re so freaking expensive and they don’t pay me enough here to turn around and spend my paycheck back on them.”

Customer: “Good point. I’ll have a medium popcorn and medium soda, please.”

Me: “Would you like to up-size those to larges for just 50 cents each?”

Dumb, Dumberer And Dumberest

| Anchorage, AK, USA | Uncategorized

(I’m waiting in the movie ticket line and overhear three teenage girls having a conversation.)

Girl #1: “What is the mat-in-ee?”

Girl #2: “That’s like, a sea creature, right?”

Girl #3: “OMG, you are so stupid! Its like when you get a discount because your dad is, like, in the military or something.”

Girl #1: “OMG, I’m so stupid!”

Girl #3: “Yeah, you should pay more attention to your surroundings!”

When Customers Attack, Part 2

| Mississauga, Ontario, Canada | Uncategorized

Customer: “Yeah, can I get extra butter?”

Coworker:: “Actually the butter is self-serve on the sides of concession. You can help yourself, ma’am.”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “WELL IF YOU’RE NOT GOING TO HELP ME I WON’T COME BACK NEXT TIME!”

Coworker:: “Please don’t hurt me!”

Related:
When Customers Attack

We Have No Power, Starring Samuel L. Jackson

| Cincinnati, OH, USA | Uncategorized

(During a major power outage that left all of Cincinnati in the dark for days, a woman calls the theater asking about movie times.)

Customer: “Hi, what movies do you have playing today?”

Me: “None, we don’t have electricity.”

Customer: “And what time does that start?”

Me: “Ma’am, we aren’t open.”

Customer: “That’s too early, what else you got?”

Me: “NO MOVIES ARE SHOWING TODAY!”

Customer: “I heard that was no good.”

Me: “We can’t show movies because we have no power!”

Customer: “Is that the movie with Samuel L Jackson?”

Me: *gives up* “Yes, ma’am. It starts at 6pm but you might want to be here early because it gets crowded this time of day.”

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