Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Bigotry Comes In All Shapes And Sizes
    (1,945 thumbs up)
  • April Themed Story Giveaway: Creepy Customers!
    Submit your story today!

    Life Is Stranger Than The Fiction Section

    | SC, USA | Books & Reading, Themed Giveaway, Top, Wild & Unruly

    Me: “Sorry, you can’t check this out.”

    Patron: “Why not?”

    Me: “You have three overdue books.”

    Patron: “Is there anyway you can let this slide?”

    Me: “Nope.”

    (The patron proceeds to take off her shirt.)

    Patron: “How about now?”

    Me: “No. Please put on your shirt before I call the police.”

    (The patron then takes off her pants, pulls aside her underwear, and soaks the floor. It is carpet, so there is a lot of damage. My coworker calls the police.)

    Patron: “Now will you let it slide?”

    Me: “No.”

    Patron: “F*** you!”

    (She goes over to a shelf, puts her back against it, and pees all over. It splashes up and ruins several books. She also defecates, picks up one of the books, tears out several pages, and uses it to wipe. The police arrive, and she calls her boyfriend, who is apparently in another section. He pleads with the police to let her free, but they don’t let her. He then adds to the mess that his girlfriend has already made. The police take him too. Later, we find another section that is completely ruined. That must have been where the boyfriend was.)

    He’s Not Fine With It

    | Zion, IL, USA | Books & Reading, Money

    (A few weeks earlier, we had a massive power outage in the area. Even after we got power back, the system was down for a time, and patron accounts were not accessible. Because of this, if anybody wanted to use the public computers, we had to print out a guest pass. The system is now working again.)

    Patron: “I’d like a guest pass to use the computer, please.”

    Me: “Actually, the system is back up. You should be able to sign in with your card.”

    Patron: “The fines on my card are too high; it won’t let me on.”

    Me: “Oh. I’m sorry. In that case, you can’t use the computer.”

    Patron: “I don’t understand. Somebody printed a guest pass for me last week.”

    Me: “That’s because the system was down. Nobody was able to use their cards then. But now that they’re back up, we have to go by the rules.”

    Patron: “Tell me something: if somebody came in from a different library district and had to use the computer, what would you do?”

    Me: “I’d give them a guest pass.”

    Patron: “So how is this any different?”

    Me: “If a patron came in from a different library district, then they wouldn’t owe us money.”

    Her Point Has No Weight

    | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Bigotry, Health & Body, Themed Giveaway

    (I am working the reference desk. I have a great rapport with our patrons, and am often complimented for my positive attitude.)

    Me: “This is the reference desk. How can I help you?”

    Patron: “Can you tell me why fat people are so defensive?”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Patron: “Can you tell me why fat people are so defensive?”

    Me: “I can find you some materials on obesity, or prejudice faced by obese people perhaps—”

    Patron: “I just want to know why fat people are always so angry.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I don’t think I can answer your question.”

    Patron: “See! You’re angry!”

    Me: “I’m sorry; do I know you?”

    Patron: “No, but I’ve been in your library before, and I recognize your voice. You’re fat. Why are you so angry?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I consider your question offensive and bigoted. Would you ask that same question about a particular ethnic group?”

    Patron: “You’re a f******* fat b****!”

    (I’d like to say this conversation didn’t shake me, but I felt ashamed of my appearance for the rest of the day.)

    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 2

    | Tampa, FL, USA | Books & Reading, Technology

    (I have reserved an audio-book at the library and have come in to get it. I am looking at other books, when another customer runs up to me and grabs my reserved books—which still have my name on it—out of my hands.)

    Customer: “Oh, my goodness! I have been looking everywhere for this one!”

    (She starts to walk away from me with the audio-book in her hand.)

    Me: “Um, ma’am. That’s my audio-book. I reserved it.”

    Customer: “Why do you have to be so greedy! I want this book! It’s not yours; it doesn’t have your name on it!”

    Me: *pointing to the large sticker with my name on it* “Actually, it is!”

    (The customer scoffs, and tears the sticker off.)

    Customer: “There! Now it’s not! Thanks for the book!”

    (She storms off to the self check-out counter, and then starts screaming when it won’t let her check the book out. A librarian comes over to find out what the screaming is all about. I stand just behind her.)

    Librarian: “What seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “There is something wrong with this machine! It won’t let me check this audio-book out!”

    Me: “Actually there is nothing wrong with the machine. That’s my book that she stole out of my hands. I reserved it over a week ago!”

    (The librarian turns to me, obviously not paying attention to what I was saying.)

    Librarian: “Ma’am, please wait your turn.”

    Customer: “I want this book! This girl tried to take it from me! She’s too young to be reading a book like this! It’s too big for her!”

    (The librarian takes the audio-book from the lady and asks to see her library card. After trying to check the book out and it giving her a fail message a few times, she ‘deems’ the book broken, and therefore not able to check out. She starts to walk away with the audio-book, when I stop her.)

    Me: “May I try something real quick?”

    (The librarian shrugs and hands me the audio-book.)

    Customer: “It won’t work! Are you stupid, little girl? She just said that it was broken.”

    (Within seconds, I scan my library card and the audio-book. It checks out with no issues.)

    Librarian: “Well that was interesting! Why didn’t it have your name on the side?”

    Customer: “Oh! I thought she did that herself. She looked like a greedy little girl that felt the need to put her name on everything!”

    Me: “Well ma’am, like I told you, I reserved the book. And by the way, I am almost 30. I am in no way a little girl, and even when I was a little girl I loved to read ‘big books’.”

    (I turn to the librarian.)

    Me: “It did have my name on it, but she tore it off and threw it at me.”

    Customer: “So… can I have that book now?”

    Librarian and Me: *at the same time* “NO!”

    Related:
    Past The Point Of No Return

    Save It On A Flesh Drive

    | WA, USA | Books & Reading, Language & Words, Technology

    (Our library offers several touch-screen computers that customers can use to check out items themselves. The customer is a friendly regular, but a little shy because English is not her first language.)

    Customer: “Why does this machine require flesh?”

    Me: “W-what?”

    Customer: “This machine. I am touching it, but it does not work. Is because…?”

    (She shows that she is wearing gloves.)

    Me: “Oh! I’m sorry; yes I suppose the screens don’t work if you have gloves on. I had never really thought about that.”

    Customer: “Ah. Okay, sorry to be bother.”

    Me: “No, no! That is the best thing I’ve heard all week.”

    (Now whenever the computers have problems, the staff joke that they ‘require flesh’ to function, and someone must be sacrificed to appease them.)


    Page 5/30First...34567...Last