October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Educational Programs Have Never Been More Needed

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Uncategorized

Me: “[Business library], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, so, I want to know about the educational programs you offer.”

Me: “Oh, okay. That’s actually not conducted through the library. I’ll have to find you the phone number for the coordinator.”

(The caller asks a dozen questions about the differences between the programs we offer. I answer the best I can while continuing to tell him I’ll need to have him call a different number. I put him on hold to find the number.)

Me: “Hi, sir. You’re going to have to call this number and speak to the program coordinator.”

Caller: “Fine, okay. What’s the number?”

(I give him the number.)

Caller: “Okay. Transfer me.”

Me: “Actually, I can’t transfer you because they’re in a different building. But if you want to call the number I gave you, they’d be happy to help.”

Caller: “So, you can’t help me?”

Me: “Not with the information you’re looking for.”

Caller: “What are you again?”

Me: “The librarian.”

Caller: “I don’t understand. You need to explain that to me. Can you also tell me about the educational programs you offer?”

Cause Of Bad Education Is Ap(parent)

| Melbourne, Australia | Uncategorized

Patron: “Why won’t my library card work?”

Me: “Let me see. Okay, you have $30 in fines on your card. You won’t be able to use it until those fines are paid.”

Patron: “I wanted to get some books for my daughter.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Until the fines are paid, you can’t use the card.”

Patron, to daughter: “Come on honey, let’s go home. The lady doesn’t want you to learn anything today.”

No One Is Stealing That ID

| KY, USA | Uncategorized

(A man walks up to me at the circulation desk.)

Customer: “I need to get on the computer.”

Me: “No problem, sir. May I see your ID?”

Customer: “Where’s your bathroom?”

Me: *pointing* “Right down that hall, second grey door
on the left.”

Customer: “You don’t mind if I go there to get my ID out, do you?”

Battling For The Answer

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Books & Reading, Family & Kids, Uncategorized

Me: “Hi. Can I help you find something?”

Patron: “Yeah, my son’s doing some project and he needs some books on some sort of revolution.”

Me: “Okay, so he can pick any revolution to do the project on?”

Patron: “No, he’s doing it on The Revolution. Where do I find books on that?”

Me: “Which revolution? American? French? Haitian? Industrial? There were a lot.”

Patron: “I think he said it was the one that had a lot of battles.”

The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 2

| Ocean County, NJ, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “Who’s that chick who wrote Twilight?”

Me: “That would be Stephanie Meyer.”

Customer: “And what’s the fourth one?”

Me:Breaking Dawn.”

Customer: “And that’s still whoever Meyer?”

Me: “She wrote the whole series, ma’am.”

(The customer heads to the DVD rack. I see her looking roughly in the ‘B’ section.)

Customer: *yelling* “I don’t see it!”

Me: “Ma’am, Breaking Dawn is a book. The movie hasn’t been released yet.”

Customer: “Those were books?”

The Twilight Of Our Literacy

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