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  • Always Time For A Rhyme
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  • Mixing In Danger Costs Extra

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada |

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like vanilla ice cream with peanut butter cups mixed in, please.”

    Me: “OK, is that all for you?”

    Customer: “Yes, and just so you know, I’m allergic to peanuts. Can you make sure it’s nut-free?”

    Me: “Uh…you just ordered PEANUT butter cups for your ice cream…

    Customer: “I thought you guys could do allergy safe ice cream. The sign says you can make sure my food is allergy safe!”

    Me: “Well, yes…but you need to order food without peanuts in it first…”

    I Cry, You Cry, We All Cry For Ice Cream

    | Greensboro, NC, USA |

    Coworker: “Hi, welcome to [ice cream store]. Can I take your order?”

    Customer: “Yes, I’d like coffee ice cream with Heath bar mixed in.”

    (My coworker mixes the ice cream and then hands it to the customer, a 40-year old woman. She beings to CRY in front of everyone.)

    Coworker: “Ma’am, is something wrong?”

    Customer: *sobbing* “My Heath bar isn’t crunched up enough!”

    Coworker: “I’m so sorry about that, ma’am. I can make you another one.”

    (The coworker makes another one and pounds the Heath bar into extra fine pieces. He then hands it to the customer.)

    Coworker: “Is this mixed up enough, ma’am?”

    Customer: *wailing* “I can’t tell now because it’s mixed into the ice cream!”

    (The customer pays, storms off, and leaves the store sobbing with ice cream in hand.)

    This Is Why We Don’t Color Code People

    | California, USA | Top

    Me: “Hi, what can I get for you?”

    Customer: “No!”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Customer: “No! I don’t want no g**d*** Chinese serving me.”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “Get me an American.”

    Me: “Sir, I am American.”

    Customer: “What?! You think I’m blind? You think I’m f***ing blind? Go back to China!”

    Me: “Right, one second…”

    (My coworkers hear everything from the back, so one of my white coworkers comes out.)

    Customer: “Ugh, finally… an American!”

    Coworker: *starts speaking Spanish*

    Customer: “G**D*** IT! F*** Y’ALL, A**HOLES!” *storms out*

    Ben’s OK, Jerry’s Gone Nuts

    | Colorado, USA |

    Me: “Can I help you?”

    Customer: “I would like your biggest cup of pecan ice cream.”

    (I serve it up and continue with the rest of the customers. About 15 minutes later, the same guy shows up.)

    Customer: “There’s something wrong with this ice cream. It’s more nuts than it is anything else!”

    (I look down and see there’s only 2 bites of ice cream left.)

    Me: “I’m sorry – I’d be happy to give you another flavor if you’d like.”

    Customer: “This is ridiculous – do you make the ice cream yourself?”

    Me: “We do make it right here every day.”

    Customer: “No, I mean do YOU make it?”

    Me: “No, we have people in charge of making the ice cream.”

    Customer: “You should really try the ice cream before you give it out to people, to warn them.”

    Me: “…so what ice cream would you like instead?”

    Customer: “I’ll take the peanut butter one.”

    Me: “I’ve tried that one and it’s made with real peanuts. You might encounter the same problem.”

    Customer: “Did I ask you for your opinion on it?”

    Me: “…”

    Customer Of The Week: Fathead

    | Evergreen, CO, USA | Old Comics

    Customer Of The Week: Fathead
    Created by our friends at Quitting Time

    Original Story

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