• My Roommate Is My Pet Hate
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  • September Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Dog Teeth Are Not Rootine

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Uncategorized

    Customer: “Excuse me, can I have a toothbrush?”

    Me: “Sure.” *I hand her a toothbrush*

    (The customer leaves, and she comes back about five minutes later.)

    Me: “Do you need toothpaste?”

    Customer: “Oh, no, I was just wondering if this toothbrush is ADA approved? It doesn’t say that on the label.”

    Me: “That’s because we special order our toothbrushes in bulk. The box that the shipment comes in says it’s ADA approved, though, if you want me to show you that.”

    Customer: “I should. Harry is very finicky about his teeth, and I forgot his toothbrush at home.”

    (I get the box and show her that the toothbrush is ADA approved.)

    Customer: “Oh, good, Harry will be so happy! Here, let me show you some pictures of my baby!”

    (She takes out her wallet and shows me pictures of a golden retriever.)

    Me: “Um…is Harry a dog?”

    Customer: “Of course! He’s my baby!”

    Me: “We don’t allow pets in this hotel.”

    Customer: “Oh. Can I still keep the toothbrush?”

    Just Give Them A Watered Down Answer

    | Niagara Falls, ON, Canada | Uncategorized

    (I work at a hotel half an hour away from Niagara Falls.)

    Customer: “What time do the Falls stop?”

    Me: “You mean the stores? I think they’re probably closed-”

    Customer: “No, no, the Falls. What time do they run until?”

    Me: “The lights? I believe 10 or so–”

    Customer: “No, no, I mean the actual waterfall, what time do they turn it off?”

    Me: “Midnight.”

    (It’s about 11:30pm, so they thank me and run out. Two hours later, they return.)

    Customer: “Thanks a lot for the help earlier! I guess it was our lucky day. They didn’t turn them off yet!”

    The Devil Is In The Pre-Sales

    | Pennslyvania, USA | Uncategorized

    (I’m working at the hotel on Christmas Day.)

    Customer, to husband: “See that girl there? She must be one of those devil worshipers! Why else would she be here on the day of Christ’s birth?”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “Who do you worship? Why are you working on Christmas? You worship the devil!”

    Me: “Actually, I’m working because I don’t have any children. A lot of the other employees do so they’re home with their families.”

    Customer: “Who do you worship?”

    Me: “I’m a Christian.”


    Husband: *laughing* “Yes, just like Santa. He sees you when you’re sleeping and knows when you’re awake.”

    Customer: “Santa has NOTHING to do with Christ. You’ll offend them both!”

    The Devil Revils In The Details
    The Devil Is In The Ridiculous Details
    The Devil Is Definitely In The Details

    Questionable Intelligence

    | Alabama, USA | Uncategorized

    Me: “Good afternoon. Thank you for calling [hotel]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes, can you tell me what room is beside 106?”

    Me: “Um…room 107?”

    Customer: “That’s the one! Thanks so much!” *hangs up*

    The Fourth Is Not Strong With This One

    | Traverse City, MI, USA | Top, Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Thank you for calling the [hotel]. How may I direct your call?”

    Customer: *in a British accent* “I need a room for tonight.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we are booked.”

    Customer: “Why?”

    Me: “It’s the 4th of July. We’re always booked on the 4th.”

    Customer: “I know the date! Why are you booked?”

    Me: “Um, it’s July 4th.”

    Customer: “Listen, just give me a room!”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir, we are sold out. The entire town is sold out.”

    Customer: “The entire town? Why?”

    Me: “Sir, it’s the 4th of July. Independence day.”

    Customer: “Independence from what?”

    Me: “Um, England.”

    Customer: “Oh bloody h***!” *click*

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