November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Blow That Idea Right Out The Window

| Montréal, QC, Canada | Criminal/Illegal, Health & Body, Hotels & Lodging

(I work at one of the very few hotels that still has smoking rooms and so have to ask every guest who does not mention his or her preference up-front which type of room they want.)

Me: “Would you like a smoking or non-smoking room”

Guest: *with what looks like a genuinely confused look on his face* “Well… what’s the difference?”

Me: “Uh… you are allowed to smoke in a smoking room. If you smoke in a non-smoking room, we charge you a $250.00 fine for doing so.”

Guest: *visibly hesitant* “Really… uh… hmm!… And what is the difference in rates between the smoking and non-smoking?”

Me: *still maintaining my professionally patient tone of voice* “Smoking rooms are only $5.00 more per day, sir.”

Guest: *seemingly thinking it over much longer then he should need to* “How about if I take the non-smoking room and blow the smoke out the window? You wouldn’t charge me for that would you?”

(Wanting to bang my head on the counter, I stop short of it by simply nodding my head ‘Yes’ with a most serious look on my face.)

Guest: “Oh!… I… guess I’ll take the smoking room, then.”

Me: “WISE choice, sir!”

Trying To Break Breakfast

| USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

(I work the very early morning shift. Breakfast time is not for another three hours, so I take a bagel and stick it in the toaster for my breakfast. Then I go to the back to cook. When I return, my bagel is gone and there a young man in his 20s with crumbs all over his smiling mouth.)

Young Man: “Hello!”

Me: “Good morning.” *looking everywhere* “Where is my bagel?”

Young Man: “Oh, I ate it.”

Me: “…”

(I’m struggling to keep my temper at someone who might be staying as a guest, so I can’t talk for a few moments. Meanwhile the man keeps smiling foolishly.)

Me: “I see… Do you always eat food that isn’t yours? That was my bagel.”

Young Man: “Oh! Sorry! I didn’t know it was yours. I just thought someone had left and forgotten about it. I’m really sorry.”

Me: “Ok… I accept.”

(I continue my job.)

Young Man: “Can I have another?”

Me: “No… breakfast isn’t until three hours. You’ll have to wait.”

Young Man: “This is about me eating your bagel, right? I already said sorry. Now please, I want another! I can’t help it. I’m hungry!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I have to follow the rules. And they say no breakfast served until [time].”

(He continued to pester me, both pleading and apologizing, until he finally stormed off. Turned out, he wasn’t even staying there as a guest!)

If I Had A Gold Coin For Every Odd Customer

| Aurora, CO, USA | Bizarre, Money

(I am on the phone…)

Me: “…so I’m sending you an email confirmation of this reservation. Would you like the confirmation number verbally as well?”

Caller: “No, thank you. I do have one question, though…”

Me: “Yes, sir?”

Caller: “I have a clay pot sitting in front of me. It’s about eight inches wide and twelve inches deep.”

Me: “…Yes?”

Caller: “Would you be able to fill it with gold coins?”

Me: *thinking he means gold dollars* “Oh, no, sir. Unfortunately gold coins aren’t something we generally keep at the front desk, but there is a bank located within walking distance where you can exchange for gold dollars.”

Caller: “So you’ll give me a voucher when I get there?”

Me: “Uh… no. You have to exchange your own money for the gold dollars.”

Caller: “Okay. Stay out of trouble!” *click*

Under-wear Me Out

| USA | Bad Behavior, Hotels & Lodging

(A guest, an old skinny man, comes down in nothing but boxers. I am female. He’s a long term regular.)

Guest: “Oh… I thought… what happened with that other feller that was here b’fore?”

Me: “He left already. You know, you can’t… um, walk around with nothing on.”

Guest: “I HAVE SOMETHING ON! I’M NOT NEKKID! Oh well, I’d like a wake up call at…” *mumble*

Me: “At when?”

Guest: *suddenly yelling* “AT FAH O’ CLOCK!”

Me: “Five o’ clock?”

Guest: “‘S what I said.”

Me: “Okay.”

Guest: “Well?…You don’t even know which room I’m in?!”

Me: “Room 111 right?”

Guest: *looks dumbstruck* “How…?”

Me: “You stay here every night. I know who you are, Mr. [Name].”

Guest: *nods and wanders off*

(I heard a scream. A young mother and child walking down had seen him, in his underwear.)

Day One: Fine. Day Two: Attempted Kidnapping

, | Gothenburg, Sweden | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Hotels & Lodging

(I’m on my first internship at a hotel restaurant and have received good praise from the boss and the other workers. It’s my second day and since it’s late November, the restaurant is fully booked for various company’s Christmas parties. I’ve just turned 18 and I am legally allowed to serve alcohol to customers. My coworker instructs me what to do and warns me about how ‘free spirited’ the customers can (and will) be. They also tell me that I should report immediately if something happens. The first hour passes by fast and many of the guests are dancing in the middle of the floor. I go to pick up some of the plates from an empty table in one of the corners of the room when someone suddenly grabs my butt. I turn around and see a man around fifty-years-old.)

Me: “What are you doing?!” *I immediately respond and take his hands of my back*

Customer: “Don’t be such a heartbreaker, darling. I was just admiring your behind and couldn’t help myself.”

(He smirks jokingly. To my surprise he doesn’t seem drunk at all.)

Me: “Well, sir, I’m sorry to inform you but I feel very uncomfortable.”

Customer: “Well I have a suggestion that the two of us could move to a more quiet place and maybe get to know each other better.”

(Before I can respond the man proceeds to grab me and drag me out of the room. In my state of panic I catch a glance towards the kitchen door and see, on one of the female coworkers, a shocked face, and how she rushes through the door. The man just reaches the exit when the security chief, a tall and very muscular man, enters through the kitchen doors. He spots the man dragging me out and runs to us.)

Security: “And where are you going with our waiter? I suggests NOWHERE!”

(The entire room stopped and turned to us and the man became pale as a ghost, let me go, and then headed towards the exit. After the man ran away the boss came down and asked if I was all right. I was sent home early to get a good night’s sleep. The scary thing was that the man wasn’t even on the guest list. He had just entered the party without anyone’s permission!)