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  • May Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

    Extra Coating Of Generosity

    | USA | Awesome Customers, Top

    (It’s about 32°F out. I’m walking into the store before my shift; I’m not wearing a coat because I forgot it at home. I am stopped by a customer loading his groceries into his car.)

    Customer: “You must be freezing!”

    Me: “Oh, it’s not so bad.”

    Customer: *shakes his head* “It’s too cold to not have a coat! You should hurry inside!”

    Me: “I will; have a good day, sir!”

    (Half an hour later, the same customer comes through my line with a brand new winter coat draped over one arm.)

    Customer: *hands me the coat* “Everyone deserves to be warm in the winter.”

    Me: *shocked* “Thank you, sir, but I can’t—”

    Customer: “Don’t worry about it, just pay it forward.”

    (He left before I could get another word in. Not personally needing the coat, I donated it to a local coat-drive, along with $200 my co-workers and I collected by sharing the story amongst ourselves and other customers.)

    In A Fowl Holiday Mood

    | Detroit, MI, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It is Christmas Eve. We close at 5:00 pm, and are closed completely Christmas Day. It is 5:15 pm and I am getting the last of the carts inside when a customer comes running up.)

    Customer: “Hey, I need to buy a turkey!”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, but we’re closed.”

    Customer: “Since when?!”

    Me: “5:00, sir.”

    Customer: “Well, what time are you open tomorrow?”

    Me: “We’re closed, sir.”

    Customer: “Why!?”

    Me: “Because we want to spend the day with our families.”

    (He flips me the bird and walks away.)

    Me: “Merry Christmas!”

    Hard-To-Please-Her Scrooge

    | BC, Canada | Awesome Customers, Holidays, Money, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s nearing Christmas time, and I am working at the till to cover a coworker’s break. I start to ring through a man’s groceries. Behind him is an old lady, whom I recognize as being a regular. She is always grumpy.)

    Man: *quietly* “And I’d like to pay for her stuff, too.”

    (I laugh.)

    Man: “No, really.”

    Me: “Oh! Okay.”

    (This has never happened to me before. I look over at the lady’s packages and enter them manually, rather than scanning them, and tell the man his new total.)

    Man: “Don’t tell her until after I’m gone.”

    Me: “Okay.”

    (I finish the transaction, hand him his receipt, and tell him to have a good day. Just as he is about to leave, he drops his wallet. All his cards spill out everywhere, and he has to stop and pick them all up. I put the old lady’s packages in bags and hand them to her.)

    Me: “Here you go!”

    Old Lady: “What do I owe you?”

    Me: “It’s taken care of.”

    Old Lady: “What?”

    Me: “It’s paid for.”

    Old Lady: *scowling* “Who did that?”

    (The man is still trying to cram cards back into his wallet without dropping his groceries.)

    Me: “Um… him.”

    (The old lady starts scowling at him.)

    Old Lady: “Why did you do that?”

    Man: “Well, it’s Christmas. Merry Christmas.”

    (He finally manages to tuck his wallet away and leaves.)

    Old Lady: “I know I’ve seen that jerk around somewhere!”

    Drop(out) The Bomb

    | AB, Canada | School, Underaged

    (I live in a small town; as such, little stories such as ‘so and so made this all star team’ or ‘this person went to a university’s honor band” frequently appear in the newspaper. During high school, I was part of the later group until I started university, where my name would continue to appear in the Dean’s List published at the end of each semester. At this moment, university has been out for a week, while the high schools are finishing up their school year.)

    Customer: “Hey, why aren’t you in school?”

    Me: “Beg pardon?”

    Customer: “It’s 11:00 AM; not even the students with special privileges to work during school hours should be out yet! Why are you not at [School] and working here?”

    Me: “Sir, I graduated a few years ago.”

    Customer: “No, you didn’t! I just saw your name in the paper for some fancy list.”

    Me: “Oh, you mean the Dean’s List? Yes, I’m happy that I got on it this semester. I was taking a full load of classes!”

    Customer: “You shouldn’t be done yet! School doesn’t finish for another three weeks.”

    Me: “Sir, I no longer attend [High School]. Instead, I—”

    Customer: *shocked* “You dropped out?! After all those times you were in the paper for music and smart stuff? What in the world possessed you to do that?!”

    Me: “I didn’t drop out sir. I just—”

    Customer: “Where is your manager? I need to talk to him about hiring drop outs, even if they appear to be smarticle like you!”

    (Yes, he did use the word ‘smarticle.’)

    Me: *pulls university ID card out of pocket wallet* “Please read the date this was issued.”

    Customer: “Summer 2010?”

    Me: “Yes. Now, why would I have a university ID card?”

    Customer: “Because you go to that university?”

    (I wait.)

    Customer: “Oh… yeah. That was the college list, wasn’t it?” *gathers up items, pays, and leaves*

    Can’t Vouch(er) For His Intelligence, Part 3

    | Ottawa, ON, Canada | Money

    (I receive a phone call while working the customer service desk.)

    Me: “Hello, [store name], how can I help you?”

    Customer: “Hi, dear. I’ve got a $50 food voucher and I was just wondering if I could get a phone card for it.”

    (Food vouchers are basically welfare cheques that can only be used towards food purchases.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, it cannot.”

    Customer: “I don’t need $50 of food! What if I just bought $10 of food, and use the change I get back on a phone card?”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, we cannot give you change back. If you spend less than the amount on the voucher, no change is given. If you go over the $50, you have to pay the difference yourself.”

    Customer: “Well, what if I bought $50 of food, returned it, got the money back and then bought the phone card?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we also do not give you a receipt. This is so people don’t return food to get non-food items in return. If you return items without a receipt, all we can do is exchange it for a similar item.”

    Customer: “Well, what am I supposed to do with a $50 food voucher?”

    Me: “Buy food.”

    Customer: “But I need a phone card! This is ridiculous!” *hangs up*

    Can’t Vouch(er) For His Intelligence, Part 2

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