October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Meat Her Halfway

| NY, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I’m working the self-scan machines. A grandfather comes by with his granddaughter in the seat of the shopping cart. He takes a pack of cookies from the nearby shelf and gives them to her.)

Grandfather: “Okay, honey, what should we get next?”

Granddaughter: “MEAT!”

Me: *chuckling* “I guess she’s a little carnivore, huh?”

Grandfather: *also laughing* “Well, her mom’s a vegetarian so I can’t really give her meat.”

Granddaughter: *bouncing in the seat with a big smile* “MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT!”

Me: “I don’t think she’s a vegetarian, sir.”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 41

| USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I’m a cashier at a grocery store. I’ve just run up this customer’s items and she slides a card through the EFTPOS. I get a ‘do not honor’ error on my screen. For whatever reason, sometimes our machines give us this error if someone enters the wrong PIN.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. Could you try that again, please?”

(She slides it through again and I see she’s selecting credit, not debit, so it can’t be the incorrect PIN. I get the error message again.)

Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am, but it’s not going through. Do you have another form of payment?”

Customer: “Oh, sure!”

(She turns to her husband, who dutifully spreads out like a deck of cards at least 15 credit and debit cards. I stare, mouth agape, as she carefully chooses one and slides it through.)

Me: “Uh… well, that one worked.”

Customer: *laughs* “Of course it did! When you run out of money on one, you just move on to the next card in line!”

(Her husband nods and they gather up their groceries. The next customer comes up and shakes her head.)

Customer #2: “I feel sorry for the poor card rep who’ll have to explain to those idiots that money isn’t free when they’re $300,000 in debt.”

Me: “Amen, sister.”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 40
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 39
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 38

Cereal Bad Parenting

| Omaha, NE, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

(A coworker is helping a woman find a roast for a dinner party. She isn’t paying any attention to her kid; he has decided to start using the cereal boxes on display as his own punching bags, knocking down part of the stack and stomping on it. I walk over to where she’s talking to my coworker and wait for a pause in the conversation.)

Me: “Ma’am, could you ask your son to stop kicking the display, please?”

(The customer looks over at her kid and rolls her eyes, going over and yanking his arm pretty harshly before dragging him over to me.)

Customer: “What should his punishment be?”

Me: “What?”

Customer: “What should his punishment be? If you want to be the f***** parent, be the f****** parent. I don’t appreciate your tone, you little s***.”

Me: “I’m—”

Manager: *walking over* “Ma’am, your son was destroying store property. We can’t sell the cereal when the boxes and bags are open. I’d like for you to apologize to my employee. Your roast comes at $45.76 and a quick estimate on the cereal makes your total bill today around $80.”

Customer: “F****** a**-hole. I’m not paying for that because your stupid high-schooler got an attitude with me.”

Manager: “Ma’am, even if that were true, he didn’t break open the boxes of cereal. That was your son.”

Customer: “Whatever.”

(She now is banned until she pays for the cereal.)

Don’t Earn Enough Dough To Deal With This Dough

| VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

(I work in a grocery store, and overall I love it! But I’ve watched the same mother do this multiple times. She has a kid who is almost a teenager, and always walks by the pizza dough, then plays with it like it is a basketball. She picks it up throwing it around, and spins it. She looked at her kid, and then me.)

Mother: “Oh, kids, I’m glad we are giving you something to do since you are getting paid.” *walks away*

He’ll Be Führer-ious

| MI, USA | Funny Names, History

(I’ve recently started my first job as a cashier at a small town’s grocery store. A large, seemingly drunk man has approached my register at night.)

Customer: “Hey! Where’s Hitler?”

Me: “Uhm… what?”

Customer: “You heard me! Where is Hitler?”

Me: *thinking this is a joke of some sort* “He’s, well, dead.”

Customer: “What? No! Not that Hitler! I mean your boss!”

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