November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

It’s A Dry Pizza State

| Billings, MT, USA | Food & Drink

(I am working the graveyard shift at a gas station. Company policy has us lock up the beer case at 1:45 AM as the law is to stop serving/selling alcohol after 2 AM. It’s 2:10 and a very drunk customer walks in and straight to the beer case.)

Customer: “Why is the beer locked up?!”

Me: “Sorry, we stop selling at 1:45.”

Customer: “Noooo!”

(He hangs head and walks over to the frozen pizza section. Just as he reaches for the handle the lights in the freezer turn off because it started defrosting.)

Customer: *looks at me and starts crying* “I can’t buy pizza either?!”

No Will For A Refill

| MO, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers

(I’m currently at the register because the manager on shift doesn’t like to be up there all day. I normally don’t mind too much, and he’ll put someone else on if I’m just not feeling it. It is getting late and we have several customers in the store when the manager comes up and leans in close, which is always a sign that he’s talking about a customer.)

Manager: *whispering* “There’s a man in a baseball cap with a frozen refill in a mug and he’s going to say it’s ice.”

(After he says that he gets off the register to return to the store and I wait for the man in question. After a couple of minutes a man fitting the description comes up with a fifty two ounce mug and says it is an ice refill.)

Me: “My manager just told me that that is a frozen refill.”

Man: *getting grumpy* “No, it’s ice.”

Me: “If it’s ice, could you open it and show me?”

Man: “Fine, just take it!”

(He shoved the mug at me, luckily not knocking it off the counter, before he stormed out of the store. I double-checked that, yes, the mug was filled with one of our frozen drinks. A few minutes later my manager came back up and told me that the man saw him and threatened ‘to get him.’ All of this over a dollar-something refill that we caught him trying to filch.)

Pumped For Revenge

| Edinburgh, Scotland, UK | Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Transportation

(A customer comes to the cash desk:)

Customer: “Pump six.”

Me: “That will be £20.01 please.”

Customer: “Twenty pounds … and a penny! Hah! You win this time pump, but I shall have my revenge.”

(He pays and then walks towards the door, cackling maniacally and waving his fist in the air. As he leaves he shouts:)


No ID, No Idea, Part 19

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Underaged

(A girl who looks about 16 asks for a pack of cigarettes. For future clarity, this took place on November 25, 2014.)

Me: “Can I please see your ID?”

Customer: “I come here all the time and I never need my ID!”

Me: “Okay, but I personally haven’t seen you here before, so I just need to check it today.”

Customer: “I don’t have it, though! I never have it!”

Me: “All right, can I at least have your date of birth?”

Customer:“Uh… January 12th… 1992.”

Me: “So you’re 23, then?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “Then how come the birthday you gave me would make you 22?”

(She turned bright red and quickly left the store.)

No ID, No Idea, Part 18
No ID, No Idea, Part 17
No ID, No Idea, Part 16

Tat Settles That

| NC, USA | Religion, Theme Of The Month

(I am standing in line behind a little old lady. I am covered in tattoos.)

Cashier: “Your total is $8. Will that be cash or credit?”

Little Old Lady: “I don’t have a credit card! And I only have $5 in cash!”

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am, I have a few dollars you can borrow.” *holds out cash*

Little Old Lady: *turns around and sees me* “NO! I WILL NOT TAKE MONEY FROM A DEVIL WORSHIPER LIKE YOU! And look! You are buying cigarettes! Your generation will ruin us!” *storms out without paying*

Cashier: *to me* “She was buying tobacco and cigarettes!”