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    If You Build It, They Will Come Early

    | Pennsylvania, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Top

    (I am working on a new gas station still under construction. Please note that the station is still nothing but a concrete building and new pumps. The gas signs read ‘00.00’.”)

    (A customer pulls up in a car and sits there for ten minutes. She then lays on the horn. I go over to her, and she looks extremely annoyed.)

    Me: “Do you need some help, ma’am?”

    Customer: “Finally! Yes, I want my free gas!”

    Me: *puzzled* “Free gas?”

    Customer: *ridiculous sigh and rolling eyes* “Yes! The sign says zero dollars, so the gas must be free! You have to give me some or I’ll sue for false advertising!”

    Me: “Ma’am, we’re not even open yet. We haven’t even finished the roof on the building, we don’t have gas yet. See all the construction stuff?”

    Customer: “Well there’s a sign! It says gas for zero dollars and I want my gas for zero dollars! Now!”

    Me: “Again ma’am, I’m sorry but there is no gas at this station. We’re still building it, we’re not open. Those gas pumps aren’t even hooked up yet.”

    Customer: “Well that’s completely unacceptable! You shouldn’t put signs up before you’re open!”

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am, we’re still building it.”

    Customer: *screaming* Well you shouldn’t build it until you’re open! Idiot!”

    A Crude Assumption That Needs Refining

    | Norway | Crazy Requests, Language & Words

    Customer: “I need oil for my car. I need the 10-40.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, we’re out of that.”

    Customer: “Well, go get some more.”

    Me: “I can’t just do that. I could order some for you, and it will be here in a couple of days.”

    Customer: “No! Just go back there!” *points to the storage room* “Get some from the tap.”

    Me: “The tap?”

    Customer: “I know that every gas station is connected to the oil rigs in the North Sea!”

    Yukon Not Spend It

    | Alberta, Canada | Canada, Money, Tourists/Travel

    Customer: "Why is my credit card being denied?"

    Me: "Is it an American credit card?"

    Customer: "Yes, I’m from Texas and I’m traveling to Alaska."

    Me: "Credit card companies sometimes block purchases made in other countries if they don’t know you’re traveling."

    Customer: "But I’m not in another country."

    Me: "This is Canada, sir."

    Customer: "But it’s on the way to Alaska."

    Me: "I know sir, but it’s still another country, so you probably need to call your credit card company."

    Customer: "What stupid country is this?!"

    Me: "Actually sir, it would happen with any country you travel to because it’s a safety feature for your own security."

    Customer: "Well, if Canada wasn’t in the way of Alaska, this wouldn’t be a problem!"

    Related:
    Yukon Not Believe This Juan
    Yukon Spend It
    Yukon See It On A Map, Part 2
    Yukon See It On A Map

    Nicoteenagers

    | Ontario, Canada |

    (I have just gotten my first job, at age 16. I am a clerk in a gas station that mostly sells gas and cigarettes.)

    Customer: “Oh, hey [my name], I didn’t know you worked here.”

    Me: “Yeah, I just started a couple weeks ago. What can I get you?”

    Customer: “Can I get a pack of cigarettes?”

    Me: “We were in grade 8 together, and I’m only 16. I’m pretty sure I can’t sell you those.”

    Customer: “Yeah I like, failed a lot of grades. I’m 19 now.”

    Me: “Really? Can I see your ID then?”

    Customer: “I…I think I’ll try the 7/11 down the street.”

    Odd Quarterly Statement

    | Ontario, Canada |

    Me: “Okay, that’ll be $*.**.”

    Customer: *gives me a twenty* “Don’t give me any quarters!”

    Me: “Alright.”

    Customer: “I already have all the quarters!”

    Me: “Oh, are you collecting coins?”

    Customer: “No, but I already have all the quarters! If you give me any quarters, then I’ll know that I don’t have all the quarters! I’ll have to start all over!”


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