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    Short Changing Your Mind

    | New Zealand | Top

    Me: “Hello, sir.”

    Customer: “I want tobacco.”

    Me: “What type?”

    Customer: “Tobacco for smoking. I want five packets.”

    Me: “Okay, that’s $144.”

    Customer: “Can you make it $150? I only have fifties.”

    Me: “We do have change.”

    Customer: “No, I don’t want change.”

    Me: “Okay, then…that’s $150.”

    (The customer starts to leave, but suddenly turns around and faces me.)

    Customer: “Where’s my change, b****?!”

    Feeling Fuel-ish, Part 2

    | Marysville, WA, USA |

    (A girl of about 20 pulls up to the pump. After several minutes of her nervously looking around and doing nothing, I approach her.)

    Me: “Is there something I can help you with?”

    Customer: “I don’t know how to do this.”

    Me: “You don’t know how to fuel up your car?”

    Customer: “No! There’s so many buttons! Where does this hose thingy go?”

    Me: “Well, first you have to pay.”

    (Several minutes ensue of walking her through the procedure, in which I learn she has been driving for 4 years.)

    Customer: “Thank you so much for your help, I don’t know how anyone can do this!”

    Me: *notices license plate* “Oh! You’re from Oregon! People pump gas for you there, don’t they?”

    Customer: “Yes! I can’t believe they don’t do it here! Are the people at this gas station poor?”

    Related:
    Feeling Fuel-ish

    The Elderly Fight Change

    | New Zealand |

    (I’m working the counter of a busy service station. An elderly customer comes in to pay.)

    Me: “Good afternoon, sir. Just Pump 6 and the LPG today?”

    Customer: *producing his bankcard* “Yes, that’s all, thanks.”

    Me: “Great, your total is $46.71.” *rings up sale and waits for him to enter pin*

    Customer: “Can I have my change?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir?”

    Customer: “My change.”

    Me: “Ok sir, I’m really sorry, but I’m not quite sure what change you mean.”

    Customer: “What’s my total again?”

    Me: “$46.71.”

    Customer: “Great, can I have my change?”

    Me: “Sir, you’re paying by card. You won’t get change as you will be paying the exact amount electronically.”

    Customer: “Oh, I see.”

    (He is pressing buttons on the keypad, but has not selected an account.)

    Me: “Sir, you need to select an account.”

    Customer: “Yes, I’ve done that.”

    Me: “You want ‘Cheque’” or ‘Savings’?”

    (He finally selects ‘Cheque’ and enters in a pin. After a few seconds, it comes up declined as he has entered an incorrect pin.)

    Me: “Okay, sir, you’ve entered an invalid pin number. I need you to try again.”

    (I ring up the sale again, and make sure he selects ‘Cheque’ again. He seems very confused.)

    Customer: “What was my total again? I want to get this right.”

    Me: “Forty six dollars and seventy one cents, sir.”

    Customer: “Ok!” *punches in numbers and announces them out loud* “4-6-7-1!”

    Me: “Hang on, sir. You’re entering your total instead of your pin number.”

    Customer: “Well, yes.”

    Me: “The total is already in our computer. You need to enter the pin number for your card so the sale goes through.”

    Customer: “Oh. What’s my pin number, then?”

    Me: “Would you prefer to pay cash, sir?”

    Loyalty Ist Verboten!

    | Ontario, Canada |

    Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

    Customer: *in thick German accent* “I am great.”

    Me: “Perfect! You’re total will be $****. Do you have a [Gas Station] Points Card?”

    Customer: “No! I am German! I have everything I need!”

    About To Get A Fist For A Dollar

    | Fort Knox, KY, USA | At The Checkout, Money, Top

    Me: “Your total comes to $2.15.”

    Child Customer: “Okay.”

    (He slides his card, touches the key pad and reaches for his things.)

    Me: “Hun, you paid through gift card and there wasn’t enough to cover it all. You’re short 46 cents.”

    Child Customer: “Oh, um…can you just remove something?”

    Me: “I can’t cancel a transaction in the middle of it.”

    Child Customer: “Well, I don’t want the drink no more.”

    Me: “Look, I’ll cover the rest but next time just make sure you know how much is on your card or ask us to check before hand.”

    (I go through my pocket and pull out a dollar to cover the change after not being able to find enough change to cover the rest. I finish cashing it out and notice the kid’s still there, hand held out and ready to receive change back.)


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