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    Courage Under Hire

    | Montreal, Quebec, Canada | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m in the back, preparing for my shift. It’s past rush hour, but the station is still busy. My coworker is working the till, and there’s a line of customers.)

    Coworker: “Good evening. What pump did you have?”

    (Suddenly, the customer pulls out a BIG hunting knife.)

    Customer: *threatening* “Give me the cash!”

    Coworker: *annoyed* “Did you have gas to pay for or not? It’s late. There are people behind you in line waiting to pay and go home, and you’re holding up the line.”

    Customer: *lowers knife* “Oh, sorry.”

    (To everyone’s surprise, the would-be robber leaves, dejected. Everyone just stares at my coworker, dumbfounded.)

    Coworker: “Wait, was he trying to rob us?”

    Next Customer: “Balls of steel, man!”

    (My coworker realizes what he’s done, and starts freaking out. He was a bit shaken for an hour or so, but was okay afterwards.)

    Papering Things Into Perspective

    | Oklahoma, USA | Top

    Customer #1: “I need a receipt for Pump 5.”

    My Coworker: “Sure, here you go, sir. Is there anything else I can get for you?”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, you need to keep your pumps full of paper! The whole reason I use my credit card is so I don’t have to walk inside for a receipt!”

    Coworker: “Sorry, sir. I’ll get another roll of paper out there as soon as I can.”

    Customer #1: “Well, you need to just make sure the roll doesn’t run out!”

    (Suddenly, another customer speaks up.)

    Customer #2: “Yeah, I bet he intentionally let that pump run out of paper just to ruin your day. That’s what I’d do if I had to put up with idiots all day.”

    (Customer #1 grabs his receipt and leaves angrily. A cop who has also been waiting in line also chimes in.)

    Cop: “Man, I wish the worst thing I had to worry about was a gas pump running out of receipt paper…”

    Mother Mellows Best

    | British Columbia, Canada | Awesome Customers, Bigotry, Top

    (My coworker and I are the only ones on duty at a gas station. We work at a full service gas station, and as it’s July, we’re very busy. I’m outside filling vehicles, while my coworker is inside ringing customers up. Note that I’m kind of timid, while my coworker is kind of hot headed, and we’re both female. A man in his late forties pulls up in his big pickup truck.)

    Me: “Sir? Can I get you to pull ahead a bit and park a little closer to the pump? There are some customers who can’t reach the pump behind you, and you’re too close to the store. They can’t go around you.”

    (The customer doesn’t even look at me and stalks off towards the store.)

    Male Customer: “Fill it. Make d*** sure that you wash the windshield, too!”

    (I begin to do my job. A line is forming behind the truck, and customers are asking me what’s the hold up. I have to explain to them about the customer, and I apologize profusely. Finally, the truck is filled, and I go in to tell my coworker the price.)

    Me: “That’ll be [price].”

    (The man has been standing in line for some time, refusing to let others in front of him while he waits for the price. The store is packed and hot, and the other customers look uncomfortable.)

    Male Customer: “I’d like to pay with my [chain] points card, but I don’t know how many points are on it. Check it.”

    Coworker: “I’m sorry, but we have no way of telling you how many points are on your card. The best I can do for you is to run the card and if it comes up short, charge you that extra.”

    Male Customer: “What?! I make sure I stop at every [chain] station that I can to collect these d*** points! I will not pay for the gas with my own money! Just run the card through one of your machines and tell me how many d*** points I have!”

    Coworker: “Sir, like I told you before, we don’t have any machines that can check your points. If you want to use your card, you can, but if it comes up short I’ll have to charge you the extra.”

    (This goes on for a little while, and my coworker begins to get irate, though she keeps her cool. More customers come in and I try and help others at the second till, but then the man starts yelling at me. I ignore him and try to swipe a customer’s credit card, but the man grabs the card reader from my hand and jams his points card in. The look of shock and hurt on my face must have been apparent, because another customer, a woman maybe a bit older than the man, steps in.)

    Female Customer: *to the male customer* “WHAT THE F*** DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING? You’ve got a room full of people AND a bunch of cars outside waiting for you to get your a** out of the way and get out of here! You’ve been rude to these girls who have been nothing but polite to you, and now you’re starting to piss me off! And I’m sure I’m not the only one!”

    (The other customers nod and murmur their agreement.)

    Male Customer: “B****, I didn’t ask for your thoughts. Get back to your kitchen and your whining grandchildren!”

    Female Customer: “Is that how you would speak to your mother? Really, didn’t your mother teach you better?”

    (Suddenly, the troublesome customer doesn’t seem to be so angry. He actually looks a little bit scared at the mention of his mother. He begins stuttering and cussing her out, but the fire in him is gone. The lady fixes him the coldest stare I’ve ever seen, and then the customer flings two fifties at my coworker and begins elbowing his way through the sea of people and out of the store. The customers begin applauding and insist the heroine go to the front of the line. She’s only getting two Vitamin Waters and a bag of chips, and since the troublesome customer has given us much more than he needed, my coworker and I pay for her with the change.)

    You Just Got Served

    | Silkeborg, Denmark | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers

    (I used to work at a gas station, and regularly had to train new people. This happens on the first morning shift of my coworker. And elderly man comes in to buy some pastries. There are two other customers in the shop.)

    Coworker: “Good morning, how can I help you?”

    Customer #1: “I would like three of those.” *points at a pastry of which we only have two left*

    Coworker: “I am sorry, but I only have two left of those. Would you like another pastry instead to get the discount?”

    Customer #1: “There you go, talking! Just shut up and do your job!”

    Coworker: “I am sorry sir, but if you would just—”

    Customer #1: “SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! Do your job, b****!”

    (My coworker is now almost in tears, and I, having heard it all, step in.)

    Me: “Sir, you have to be polite! It is her first shift, and there is absolutely no need to be rude. We only have the cakes on display, and since there are just two of the pastries you want—”

    Customer #1: “Another one! Just shut up already! I am in a hurry!”

    (At that moment, the two customers who have been patiently waiting decide they have had enough and speak up.)

    Customer #2: “We don’t want people like you here. If you can’t be nice, get out!”

    Customer #3: “Yeah, just get out!”

    Customer #1: “What poor service!” *hurriedly leaves the shop with his pastries*

    Pleased To Fake Your Acquaintance

    | Kansas, USA | Liars & Scammers, Top, Underaged

    (I am working the overnight shift at a gas station when a young woman approaches and asks for a pack of cigarettes. She looks a bit young, so I ask for an ID. I glance at it and see that she is indeed old enough, but there is something just a bit off about the ID. We’re instructed to verify some information when we’re not sure if an ID is real or not.)

    Me: “Okay, what’s your date of birth?”

    Customer: *correctly states the DOB on the id*

    Me: “Good, what street do you live on?”

    Customer: “Washington.”

    Me: “So far, so good. One last question. What class did we have together our freshman year?”

    Customer: “Uh…”

    Me: “Nice try. I can’t accept this ID. Say hi to your sister for me, though.”

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