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    Taking Action On The Distraction

    , | Estado de México, Mexico | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m the customer in this story. I’ve come to the mall and on the way out I visit a stall that makes crêpes.)

    Me: “Yeah, I’d like a ham with manchego one, please.”

    Worker: *Inputs the order in the computer* “Would you like chipotle or jalapeño, sir?”

    (I’ve wandered into my own thoughts and don’t listen.)

    Worker: “Sir?”

    Me: *snapping back* “Uh?”

    Worker: “Chipotle or jalapeño, sir?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    (The worker stares at me awkwardly and then I realize what I just said.)

    Me: “Sorry, sorry! Chipotle, please.”

    (The rest of the transaction goes without any trouble and then they proceed to make the crêpe.)

    Worker: “You tell me how much chipotle do you want, sir.”

    (I look at her dabbing a little of the stuff and then adding more and more.)

    Worker: “Uh… are you distracted again?”

    Me: “Not this time. I just like it spicy.”

    Bird Is The Word

    , | Montgomery, AL, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Religion

    (I am working the drive thru on a Sunday, a time when we have a lot of regular customers after church lets out. I recognize a man from last Sunday.)

    Me: “Hey, I remember you from the other day!”

    Customer: “That’s right! You have a good memory! I like to hear the word and eat the bird!”

    Needs Some Light Soul Food

    , | CA, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

    (I am working the drive thru of the store very early in the morning.)

    Me: “Welcome to [Fast Food Store], what could I get for you today?”

    Customer: “Just a small coffee.”

    Me: “How will you take your coffee today?”

    Customer: “Black, just like my soul.”

    Me: “… okay?”

    A Trashy Pick Up Line

    , | Canada | One-Liners, Rude & Risque

    (I am in my teens, taking out the garbage. One of our regular customers, an elderly man who is a well-known jokester, comes up to me at the end of his meal. I’m switching out the trash bag.)

    Elderly Man: “What are you doing?”

    Me: “Taking out the trash.”

    Elderly Man: “Well, I’m trash. Can you take me out?”

    (I laugh into the garbage can.)

    Me: “I’m afraid I can’t, but I’ll have to remember that one. It’s good!”

    Paying It Fast Forward

    , | Kirksville, MO, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink

    (I am in the drive through lane because I am delivering a forgotten hat to a roommate that works there. I rattle off my order and pull forward. I then notice that a truck, that for whatever reason has shut down in the other drive through lane, has turned on and I am unsure whether I have accidentally cut him off.)

    Me: “Uhm, I am the one with the [order].”

    (The cashier takes my credit card and pushes a couple buttons.)

    Me: “And could I pay for the guy-behind-me’s order? I think I cut him off.”

    Cashier: “Uh… hold on.”

    (She goes to the back to confer with the manager, and then pops back.)

    Cashier: “Yeah, one moment.”

    (She runs my card twice. I receive both receipts, deliver the hat to my roommate, get my food and then drive off. Later that night, my roommate comes home.)

    Roommate: “So, apparently you set off a chain reaction. The rest of the cars in the line started to pay for the next one. [Coworker] was so relieved when it stopped! It was so confusing!”

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