Fast Food For Fast Thinkers

, | Maryland, USA | Food & Drink, Geeks Rule, Top

(I am working as a cashier and two customers come in talking loudly about how dumb minimum wage fast-food workers are. One of them decides to prove it…)

Customer: “Let me ask you a question. What’s 7 times 7?”

Me: “49.”

Customer: “What’s 8 times 8?”

Me: “64.”

Customer: “E equals MC squared?”

Me: “What about it?”

Customer: “What does it mean?”

Me: “Energy equals mass times the speed of light squared.”

Customer: “Uhm…”

Me: “Would you like fries with that?”

Stir, Yes, Sir!

, | Rochester, NY, USA |

Coworker: “Thank you for choosing [fast food restaurant]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Medium! Coffee! Two! Equal!”

Coworker: “Okay, will that be all?”

Customer: “NOOO! Medium! Coffee! Two! Cream! Three! Equal!”

Coworker: “Okay, two medium coffees. Will that be all?”

Customer: “NOOO! Medium! Honey! Lemon! Tea! Three! Splendid!”

Coworker: “Okay, will there be anything else?”

Customer: “YESSS! Large! Coffee! French Vanilla! Double! Double!”

Coworker: “Is that all?”

Customer: “YESSS!”

Seven Sons For Seven Burgers

, | Connecticut, USA |

Customer: “You seem a bit slow. Is this your first day?”

Me: “Actually, it is. I’m sorry if I held you up.”

Customer: “No problem. You’ll get the hang of it. I should know. I have seven sons, and they all work at fast food places just like you.”

Me: “Oh, that’s nice!”

Customer: “No, it’s not. It’s pathetic and disappointing!”

Related:
Childhood Dream, Meet Retail Nightmare

When Super-Sized Burgers Meet Bite-Sized Brains

, | NSW, Australia | Food & Drink

(At the fast food restaurant where I work, we’ve just introduced a burger that is very large. Three customers come into the store…)

Customer #1: “Can I get that new burger?”

Me: “Sure, would you like anything else?”

Customer #2: “Oh my God! You’re getting the new burger?!”

Customer #1: “Yeah!”

Customer #2, to me: “Hey, would that burger fit in my mouth?” *opens his mouth wide*

Me: “No, sir. I seriously believe it won’t.”

Customer #2: “What about now?” *opens bigger*

Me: “No, sir.”

Customer #2: “NOW?” *opens it as large as he possibly can*

Me: “No.”

Customer #3: “I apologise for his small mouth.” *hits the second customer on the head*

Me: “That’s okay.”

Customer #3: “So, would it fit in mine?” *opens mouth*

Me: “No it won’t, sir…”

Extremely Public Education

, | Minneapolis, MN, USA |

Me: “Hi, can I take your order?”

Drive-thru customer: “I’m sorry, I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

Me: “Can I take your order?”

Drive-thru customer: “I know, I heard you. But why would you ask that question like that?”

Me: “Um, I need to know what food to have prepared for you.”

Drive-thru customer: “Don’t get smart with me! I heard what you said, and I would prefer it if you’d word your sentence differently.”

Me: “Oh, okay. May I take your order?”

Drive-thru customer: “That’s better! Yes, you may!”

Me: “Okay, what would you like?”

Drive-thru customer: “I’m not sure yet. Give me a minute!”

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