November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Simple Menus Vs. The Simple-Minded

, | Australia | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(Our shop has a very basic menu of chicken burgers, chips, and chicken pieces.)

Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

Customer: “I don’t know what this is…”

(The customer stares blankly at the menu for about 10 seconds.)

Customer: “No. No! I don’t know what any of this is!” *walks away*

Me: *speechless*

Give Me Whatever Moos, Part 2

, | Peterborough, ON, Canada | Food & Drink

(I’m working the drive thru. We only have 2 kinds of chicken sandwiches: grilled and crispy.)

Me: “How may I help you?”

Customer: “I’d like an original chicken sandwich, please.”

Me: “The grilled chicken or the crispy chicken?”

Customer: “The original chicken sandwich.”

Me: “I’m sorry, grilled or crispy chicken?”

(The customer starts listing his toppings.)

Me: “I’m sorry sir, I need to know if it’s grilled chicken or crispy chicken.”

Customer: “No, the original chicken. The burger. We are talking about beef, right?”

Give Me Whatever Moos

Do Unto Others

, | Cape Carteret, NC, USA | Food & Drink, Top

(This takes place toward the end of my shift in the drive-thru. Everything has been slow for awhile.)

Customer: “Two cheeseburgers and that’ll be it.”

Me: “Okay sir, your total will be–”

(The customer drives ahead to the window before I can finish.)

Me: “Evening, sir. Your total will be $2.14.”

Customer: “I KNOW how to add!”

Me: “I’m sorry sir, but I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t give you your total.”

Customer: *hands me money* “I know, I’m sorry.”

Me: *makes change* “Long day?”

Customer: “Yeah, lot of customers being a**holes.”

Me: “Yeah. I know the feeling. Have a nice day!”

Next They’ll Be Huffing Parmesan

| Canberra, Australia | Food & Drink, Top

(I have been out the back making dough before serving the customer. I haven’t had time to clean myself up a bit, so I have flour on my shirt.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

Customer: *looking at my shirt* “Can I speak to the manager right away, please?”

Me: *confused* “Um, okay.”

(I call the manager over.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem, ma’am?”

Customer: “I want to complain about this employee. He has drugs on his shirt. He should be fired immediately!”

Manager: *joking* “But, then, where would I get my supply from?”

Customer: *looks shocked, and then storms out of the store*

Next customer in line: “Can I get a Hawaiian pizza on the thin base with extra drugs, please?”

The Lost And Eaten

, | Kansas City, MO, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(Sometimes, customers call the store when their order is wrong. This one was a little bit more special.)

Manager: “How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I didn’t get my food!”

Manager: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “When I came through the drive-thru, I got my food. But when I got home it was gone!”

Manager: “Let me get this straight. You got your food at the window?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Manager: “And it was in your car when you left?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Manager: “And it was gone when you got home?”

Customer: “It wasn’t there anymore.”

Manager: “So between here and home, you lost your food? How do you expect us to fix it?”

Customer: *hangs up*