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    Fast Food For Fast Thinkers

    , | Maryland, USA | Food & Drink, Geeks Rule, Top

    (I am working as a cashier and two customers come in talking loudly about how dumb minimum wage fast-food workers are. One of them decides to prove it…)

    Customer: “Let me ask you a question. What’s 7 times 7?”

    Me: “49.”

    Customer: “What’s 8 times 8?”

    Me: “64.”

    Customer: “E equals MC squared?”

    Me: “What about it?”

    Customer: “What does it mean?”

    Me: “Energy equals mass times the speed of light squared.”

    Customer: “Uhm…”

    Me: “Would you like fries with that?”

    Stir, Yes, Sir!

    , | Rochester, NY, USA |

    Coworker: “Thank you for choosing [fast food restaurant]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Medium! Coffee! Two! Equal!”

    Coworker: “Okay, will that be all?”

    Customer: “NOOO! Medium! Coffee! Two! Cream! Three! Equal!”

    Coworker: “Okay, two medium coffees. Will that be all?”

    Customer: “NOOO! Medium! Honey! Lemon! Tea! Three! Splendid!”

    Coworker: “Okay, will there be anything else?”

    Customer: “YESSS! Large! Coffee! French Vanilla! Double! Double!”

    Coworker: “Is that all?”

    Customer: “YESSS!”

    Seven Sons For Seven Burgers

    , | Connecticut, USA |

    Customer: “You seem a bit slow. Is this your first day?”

    Me: “Actually, it is. I’m sorry if I held you up.”

    Customer: “No problem. You’ll get the hang of it. I should know. I have seven sons, and they all work at fast food places just like you.”

    Me: “Oh, that’s nice!”

    Customer: “No, it’s not. It’s pathetic and disappointing!”

    Related:
    Childhood Dream, Meet Retail Nightmare

    When Super-Sized Burgers Meet Bite-Sized Brains

    , | NSW, Australia | Food & Drink

    (At the fast food restaurant where I work, we’ve just introduced a burger that is very large. Three customers come into the store…)

    Customer #1: “Can I get that new burger?”

    Me: “Sure, would you like anything else?”

    Customer #2: “Oh my God! You’re getting the new burger?!”

    Customer #1: “Yeah!”

    Customer #2, to me: “Hey, would that burger fit in my mouth?” *opens his mouth wide*

    Me: “No, sir. I seriously believe it won’t.”

    Customer #2: “What about now?” *opens bigger*

    Me: “No, sir.”

    Customer #2: “NOW?” *opens it as large as he possibly can*

    Me: “No.”

    Customer #3: “I apologise for his small mouth.” *hits the second customer on the head*

    Me: “That’s okay.”

    Customer #3: “So, would it fit in mine?” *opens mouth*

    Me: “No it won’t, sir…”

    Extremely Public Education

    , | Minneapolis, MN, USA |

    Me: “Hi, can I take your order?”

    Drive-thru customer: “I’m sorry, I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

    Me: “Can I take your order?”

    Drive-thru customer: “I know, I heard you. But why would you ask that question like that?”

    Me: “Um, I need to know what food to have prepared for you.”

    Drive-thru customer: “Don’t get smart with me! I heard what you said, and I would prefer it if you’d word your sentence differently.”

    Me: “Oh, okay. May I take your order?”

    Drive-thru customer: “That’s better! Yes, you may!”

    Me: “Okay, what would you like?”

    Drive-thru customer: “I’m not sure yet. Give me a minute!”


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