I work for a bubble tea shop. Bubble tea is a flavoured milk or tea drink that usually comes with tapioca balls — the “bubbles” — and in our place, we add them by default unless asked to remove them or replace them with another item.

A customer I have just served comes up to me and slams her drink on the counter.

Customer: “What the f*** is this?! Your drink is rotten!”

Me: “What do you mean, ma’am? The milk is fresh, and the flavoring is powdered.”

Customer: “Your milk has curdled! It’s full of disgusting lumps!”

Me: “Those are tapioca balls, ma’am. They’re part of the drink.”

Customer: “They’re disgusting! I didn’t ask for this disgusting Asian s***!”

Me: *Trying to ignore the casual racism* “Ma’am, they’re a major part of the bubble tea experience, and they’re mentioned on the menu and when you order from us. If you like, I can remake your drink without the tapioca.”

Customer: “I want a refund and a free drink!”

Me: “You’re not getting a refund.”

Customer: “Why not?!”

Me: “The same reason you don’t get a refund in [Fast Food Chain] when you order a burger and you didn’t want the patty.”

Customer: “Well… that’s not fair! I don’t know all this Asian crap!”

Me: “Our menu is in English.”

Customer: “I’m going to write a bad review online about you!”

Me: “Woman complains that her bubble tea contains bubbles. Can’t wait to read it.”

She stormed out, minus her drink. No bad review ever appeared.

I used to work at a popular fast food chain. During orientation, I was told that at some point, I would be asked, “How many nuggets are in the five-piece?”

Sure enough, it happened twice.

The first time:

Customer #1: “How many nuggets are in the five-piece?”

Me: “Can you repeat that question, please?”

Customer #1: “How many nuggets are in the five… piece… Oh.”

As she heard herself, she hung her head.

Customer #1: “I’m so sorry. I’m exhausted.”

Fair enough; we all have those days!

The second time:

Customer #2: “How many nuggets are in the five-piece?”

Me: “Can you repeat that question, please?”

Customer #2: *Loudly and angrily* “I said, how… many… nuggets… are… in… the… five-piece?!”

Should I have told him there were four pieces?

Working as a cashier in a fast food restaurant, you come to discover scams that customers will try to pull on you for free food, such as ordering food, biting into it, and then coming back and complaining that it was the incorrect order — yet getting visibly disappointed when you throw the “incorrect” sandwich in the trash and say the correct item is on the way.

This attempted scam was an interesting one that could have possibly worked, except that I’m a stickler about charging for ANY food item leaving my station.

Customer: “I’ll take two fish sandwiches with [sides].”

I enter two fish sandwiches in my register; the order appears in the kitchen for the food prep staff to get started.

Me: “€9.50, please.”

Customer: “Huh? I said one fish sandwich!”

Me: *Caught off guard* “Wait a second. One or two?”

Customer: “One!”

Me: *Running to the kitchen* “Cancel on one of the fish sandwiches!” *To the customer* “Okay, that’s [new total].”

The customer pays, and I bring up his food to the counter.

Customer: “Where’s the other one?”

Me: “You said you wanted one fish sandwich!”

Customer: “I said two! Pay attention!”

Me: “Then that’s [extra amount]! *Running back to the kitchen* “Now he wants the other one! Don’t throw it away!”

I come back to the counter and ask for the money.

Customer: *Feigned anger* “Can I talk to the manager, please?”

I run back to the kitchen… where the manager himself is prepping food while our other prepping staff is on break.

Me: “Now he wants to talk to you!”

Our manager barges out of the kitchen with his face a burgundy red.

Manager: “I’m not in the mood for this. You’re picking the wrong day today!”

Customer: “I asked for—”

Manager: “YOU ARE PICKING THE WRONG DAY TODAY!”

The customer is standing there and looking as if he’s trying to figure out what card to play next.

Customer: “You know what? Give my money back!”

My manager immediately punches in his code on the register, refunds the customer, and points to the door.

Manager: “Goodbye! Next in line, please!”

That was when I learned that some customers figured out that prep staff begin making food as it’s ordered but will stash it aside to be discarded in the event of an error. It’s then up to the would-be scammer to employ a tactic to get the “error” sandwich free — a scamming manoeuvre the manager had clearly seen numerous times and was fed up with.

I’m working through my line at the fast food place where I work.

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Fast Food Place]. What would you like to order?”

I get one of those annoying customers who doesn’t even look at the menu until they’re being served, slowing down service while they um and ahh.

Me: “Would you like to try our new chicken sandwich? It’s quite popular right now.”

Customer: “What’s in it?”

I run through the ingredients.

Customer: “Is it locally sourced chicken?”

Me: “The chicken is from within the state.”

Customer: “Is it organic?”

Me: “I know that they’re free-range.”

Customer: “Are they frozen?”

Me: “They are frozen on their journey to our stores, yes.”

The customer considers this for a moment and then goes back to umming and ahhing over the menu.

Me: “Our classic burgers are also always a good choice.”

Customer: “Is it locally sourced beef?”

Me: *Shoulders sagging* “The beef comes from Texas.”

Customer: “Is it organic?”

Me: “I don’t know, sir.”

Customer: “And—”

Me: “Yes, they’re frozen, sir.”

Customer: “Hmm…”

He goes back to just staring at the menu. The customers behind him are getting visibly annoyed.

Me: “We also have a fish burger, sir.”

Customer: “Is it—”

Me: “It’s not locally sourced, not organic, and yes, it is frozen.”

Customer: “Hmm…”

Me: “Sir, would you let me serve the next customer while you decide?”

Customer: *Ignoring me* “So… I am a vegetarian. What would you recommend?”

Next Customer: “Are you f****** serious?!” *Joins another line*

My wife and I went to a fast-food Mexican place that I had never been to but she had. When we got inside, there was a woman standing there berating the man at the counter for not having enough potatoes in her breakfast taco. Then, she started to walk out, claiming she was going to put it “all over social media”.

There were only two people working at the restaurant at that point: the man at the counter and a manager.

Customer: “You don’t want to eat here.”

Wife: *Under her breath* “Now I want to eat here more than ever.”

Then, the woman turned to us and started to unwrap the foil around her taco.

Customer: “I want to show you what I got.”

Me: *In the most polite but firm tone I can manage* “Ma’am, ma’am, no disrespect, but I do not care.”

She started trying again, but my wife interjected.

Wife: “You sound like a woman with a very specific hairstyle.”

Then, finally, she turned and left in a huff. The cashier apologized, we talked for a moment, and he explained that they cook the potatoes into the eggs and that’s just how it happened. We told him it wasn’t his fault. The service was good, the food was good, and we will go back again sometime.