Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 3

, | MI, USA | Health & Body

Me: “Hi, welcome to [establishment]; what can I get for you today?”

Customer: *angrily* “I would like to speak to a manager immediately.”

(I go to the bathroom door where our manager is. She is currently feeling unwell, and thinks that she might be sick. I let her know someone is looking for a manager. I then return to the counter.)

Me: “She will be up here in just a moment; is there anything I can do?”

Customer: “Yes, you can tell your f****** manager to hurry it up! She’s so d*** fat, she takes forever to get up here.”

Me: “Well, I can imagine that being pregnant and being sick would make you a little larger and slower.”

Customer: “Oh…” *hastily leaves*

Related:
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 2
Cause For Pregnant Pause

They Have No Drive

, | Markham, ON, Canada | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I am working in the drive-thru window. I am talking to a customer and we both notice a group of four young teens WALKING down the drive-thru lane.)

Customer: *laughs* “Don’t you love how silly kids are? Well, good night!”

(The customer leaves, and the teens approach the drive-thru window.)

Teen: “Yea, hi. I want to order.”

Me: “Yea, sorry. Unfortunately I can’t serve you here unless you are in a car. You are welcome to come inside though.”

Teen: “What are you talking about? We are in a car, see! I’m the driver holding the wheel.” *holds imaginary wheel* “And my passengers!” *points at his three friends*

Me: “Sorry, but unless you can crash your car and dent my wall. I can’t serve you here.”

Teen: “Okay!” *makes screeching noises* “CRASH!”

A Price Shake-Down

, | Anchorage, AK, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money, Theme Of The Month, Top

(I’m working the counter, and I see a six-year-old boy walk in with his mother. The mother sits in the back while the boy goes to the counter to make his order.)

Me: “Hi, sweetie! What can I get you today?”

Boy: “Can I please have a small orange-creme shake?”

Me: “Of course. Anything else?”

Boy: “No.”

Me: “Alright, that’ll be one-ninety.”

(The boy’s face crumples, and he backs away from the counter, walks in a circle, then looks back at me.)

Boy: “What?”

Me: “One-ninety?”

(The boy begins crying, and rushes back to his mother.)

Boy: “Mommy! I need $200 for my shake, and we don’t have that kinda money!”

Mother: “What?”

Me: “Wait, wait, no, sweetheart! I mean it’s one dollar and ninety cents!”

Boy: “Oh, okay.”

(After that, he pays for his shake and acts like absolutely nothing has happened.)

The Ten Doctors Versus The Ten Commandments

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV, Religion

(I order my food, and I sit down and start watching an episode of ‘Doctor Who’ on my smartphone with my headphones. Another customer taps me on the shoulder. I turn around to see a girl in her late teens.)

Customer: “Is that Doctor Who?”

Me: “Yeah, are you a fan?!”

Customer: “No! I am asking you to shut it off!”

Me: “Why?”

Customer: “Because my church says that Doctor Who is evil, and I am asking you to shut it off.”

Me: “Umm, no, I am not turning it off. Besides, I have my headphones in, so you don’t have to watch it.”

Customer: “No, you have to respect my views and turn it off! It’s against my religion; it’s evil! Now turn it off!”

(The customer grabs for my phone. I pull my phone away before she can grab it.)

Me: “Don’t touch my phone!”

Customer:Doctor Who is evil! They are trying to brain-wash our young minds! They want us to support gay marriage and be atheist!”

Me: “Well, if you really did understand Doctor Who, you would have seen that the Tenth Doctor was talking about Christmas, and he said that he was there when Jesus was born. Also the Doctor is very open-minded; he would save you even if you did call him evil.”

Customer:DOCTOR WHO IS EVIL!”

(The customer continues screaming and cussing and eventually gets herself kicked out. Afterwards, one of the restaurant’s workers comes up to me.)

Worker: “Sorry about that.”

Me: “It’s okay!”

Worker: “Best Doctor?”

Me: “Four, duh!”

(We then high five, and I go my way.)

An Open And Shut Reason

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Religion

(Our restaurant is open 24 hours a day, and only closes for two days every year. One day in the middle of summer, we unexpectedly close for the day and open the next morning.)

Me: “Good morning, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Well you can get me the [meal] that I couldn’t get yesterday morning because you guys were closed!”

Me: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, sir. Your total will be [total].”

Customer: “Well I think I should get it for free since you guys were closed. I mean, what was so d*** important you had to close in the middle of summer? What about all the people who need coffee before work and need to buy lunch?”

Me: “I can get the manager for you, but I highly doubt she will give you your meal for free.”

(I call the manager over and the customer explains again why he thinks his food should be free.)

Manager: “Sir, I know it was inconvenient for you and all our other customers, but the store was closed yesterday so we could attend a funeral for a beloved coworker that passed away two days ago. If you want compensation for the inconvenience you will have to take the matter up with God.”

(The customer doesn’t bother paying and just leaves the store. Thankfully, the majority of our customers are much nicer about the whole ordeal.)

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