A Price Shake-Down

, | Anchorage, AK, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money, Theme Of The Month, Top

(I’m working the counter, and I see a six-year-old boy walk in with his mother. The mother sits in the back while the boy goes to the counter to make his order.)

Me: “Hi, sweetie! What can I get you today?”

Boy: “Can I please have a small orange-creme shake?”

Me: “Of course. Anything else?”

Boy: “No.”

Me: “Alright, that’ll be one-ninety.”

(The boy’s face crumples, and he backs away from the counter, walks in a circle, then looks back at me.)

Boy: “What?”

Me: “One-ninety?”

(The boy begins crying, and rushes back to his mother.)

Boy: “Mommy! I need $200 for my shake, and we don’t have that kinda money!”

Mother: “What?”

Me: “Wait, wait, no, sweetheart! I mean it’s one dollar and ninety cents!”

Boy: “Oh, okay.”

(After that, he pays for his shake and acts like absolutely nothing has happened.)

The Ten Doctors Versus The Ten Commandments

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV, Religion

(I order my food, and I sit down and start watching an episode of ‘Doctor Who’ on my smartphone with my headphones. Another customer taps me on the shoulder. I turn around to see a girl in her late teens.)

Customer: “Is that Doctor Who?”

Me: “Yeah, are you a fan?!”

Customer: “No! I am asking you to shut it off!”

Me: “Why?”

Customer: “Because my church says that Doctor Who is evil, and I am asking you to shut it off.”

Me: “Umm, no, I am not turning it off. Besides, I have my headphones in, so you don’t have to watch it.”

Customer: “No, you have to respect my views and turn it off! It’s against my religion; it’s evil! Now turn it off!”

(The customer grabs for my phone. I pull my phone away before she can grab it.)

Me: “Don’t touch my phone!”

Customer:Doctor Who is evil! They are trying to brain-wash our young minds! They want us to support gay marriage and be atheist!”

Me: “Well, if you really did understand Doctor Who, you would have seen that the Tenth Doctor was talking about Christmas, and he said that he was there when Jesus was born. Also the Doctor is very open-minded; he would save you even if you did call him evil.”

Customer:DOCTOR WHO IS EVIL!”

(The customer continues screaming and cussing and eventually gets herself kicked out. Afterwards, one of the restaurant’s workers comes up to me.)

Worker: “Sorry about that.”

Me: “It’s okay!”

Worker: “Best Doctor?”

Me: “Four, duh!”

(We then high five, and I go my way.)

An Open And Shut Reason

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Religion

(Our restaurant is open 24 hours a day, and only closes for two days every year. One day in the middle of summer, we unexpectedly close for the day and open the next morning.)

Me: “Good morning, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Well you can get me the [meal] that I couldn’t get yesterday morning because you guys were closed!”

Me: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, sir. Your total will be [total].”

Customer: “Well I think I should get it for free since you guys were closed. I mean, what was so d*** important you had to close in the middle of summer? What about all the people who need coffee before work and need to buy lunch?”

Me: “I can get the manager for you, but I highly doubt she will give you your meal for free.”

(I call the manager over and the customer explains again why he thinks his food should be free.)

Manager: “Sir, I know it was inconvenient for you and all our other customers, but the store was closed yesterday so we could attend a funeral for a beloved coworker that passed away two days ago. If you want compensation for the inconvenience you will have to take the matter up with God.”

(The customer doesn’t bother paying and just leaves the store. Thankfully, the majority of our customers are much nicer about the whole ordeal.)

Named And Shamed

, | Sandy, UT, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Funny Names, Top

(My debit card has just gone missing. I think I left it at the gas station after I got gas earlier, and now I’m at work. My name is a European variation of a common American name, and though spelled similarly, is quite different. For example, Kristen versus Kirsten. As such, when people read my name, they often use the American version. One of my coworkers calls me over using my nickname.)

Coworker: “Hey, can you come here a moment?”

Me: “Sure, what’s up?”

Coworker: “This guy’s trying to use his girlfriend’s card.”

(The customer slides a credit card over that looks familiar.)

Me: “Uhm, can I see your ID?”

Customer: “It’s my girlfriend’s card; she’s out in the car. I can go get her.”

Me: “What’s her name?”

Customer: “Kristen [Last-Name].”

Me: “Spell her first name.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Please?”

Customer: *sighs* “K R I S T E N.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but she’s going to have to come in and authorize the purchase. I’ll keep the card in the back office until you get back.”

Customer: “Give me the card, you b****!”

Me: “I can’t do that when I know this card is stolen.”

Customer: “It’s not stolen, c***! That’s my girlfriend’s card!”

Me: “No. This is my card. As you can see, my name tag is spelled correctly, and you spelled it wrong. Also, if you were my boyfriend, I’d break up with you just for not knowing what my name was.”

(I was very relieved to get my card back! Unfortunately, the customer had run up $300 worth of purchases, but luckily the restaurant I work at has a security camera, and we got his face on camera. I am later able to prove I didn’t make those purchases, so don’t have to pay for them!)

One Sandwich, Hold The Plural

, | Stillwater, OK, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Language & Words, Top

(I am working at a very popular fast food place. I am very sick, and have tried to call in, but as we were short-handed, I am asked to come and just work the lunch rush. Since the lunch rush is over, my manager tells me to help the last two customers, who appear to be construction workers, and then I can go home. I smile brightly despite feeling like crap.)

Me: “Hi, what can I get for you?”

Customer: “I want [sandwiches]!”

(I am confused, as he pluralizes the word and doesn’t specify the number of sandwiches.)

Me: “Sure, how many would you like?”

Customer: *glaring* “I… want… ONE… [sandwich]. Do you understand? ONE… [sandwich].”

Me: “Sure, sorry for the misunderstanding. It’s just usually when someone pluralizes a word, that means they want more than one. Would you like the meal, or just the sandwich?”

Customer: “I said ONE [sandwich]! I don’t want the d*** meal!”

Me: “Okay, no problem. Would you like anything else?”

Customer: “Yeah, give me a small fry and an orange juice.”

Me: “Sir, it would actually be cheaper for you to just get the meal, which comes with a medium fry, and then you could still get orange juice as the drink.”

Customer: “I said I don’t want the meal! Are you stupid?”

Me: “No, sir, just trying to save you money. But that’s fine. Your total is [total].”

(His total is a couple of dollars more than how much the meal would have been.)

Customer: “Wait. How much would the meal be?”

Me: “Just one moment, and I’ll total that up for you.”

(I press a few buttons, canceling out his order, and replace it with the meal with an orange juice.)

Me: “Your total doing it that way is [new total].”

Customer: “Huh. I guess it is cheaper. I’ll do that instead.”

(The customer pays, and I help the next customer in line, who is apparently one of his coworkers. This one is much nicer than the other one, and even says please and thank you. I get off work and go to change out of my work clothes so I can walk home. On my way out of the bathroom, I’m stopped by the two men.)

Customer: “Listen, I’m really sorry for how I treated you. There was no excuse for that. I’ve just had a really bad day.”

Me: “It’s okay, sir, really.”

Customer: “This is for you.”

(He hands me an apple pie, which he had apparently gotten after I had gone into the bathroom to change.)

Customer: “Your manager tells me that you are sick today, and still came in. I never would have guessed you weren’t feeling well. Your customer service is really extraordinary, and I told him so.”

Me: “Thank you so much, sir. I hope you have a much better day from here on out, both of you!”

(They wish me a good day also, and tell me they hope I feel better soon. Somehow, after that, I DO actually feel better!)

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