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    Customer Service(d)

    , | Baton Rouge, LA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

    (My sisters and I are out shopping and stop by a fast food restaurant for lunch. Both of my sisters still work there, and I have only recently quit to take another job. Several of our good friends work there as well. One such friend is on shift, greeting customers who come in and cleaning tables. When we enter, she comes over and gives us all hugs. Another customer has walked in right behind us, and sees our friend give us all hugs.)

    Customer: “Do I get a hug too?”

    (Without thinking, she hugs him. He just grins and walks off. We all stare at her in shock.)

    Coworker: “I thought he was with you guys…”

    With Great Bacon, Comes Great Responsibility, Part 11

    , | Red Deer, AB, Canada | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

    (I am taking orders on drive thru.)

    Me: “Hi, welcome to [Restaurant]. What can I get for you?”

    Customer: “Hey! So, I hear you guys have hickory-smoked bacon! This is true, right? You have bacon?”

    Me: “Yes, we do. It can be added to any sandwich or baked goo—”

    Customer: “No, no, I just want bacon. Bacon!”

    Me: “Just bacon alone?”

    Customer: “Yeah! Lots of bacon!”

    Me: “So, would 10 slices be okay?”

    Customer: “No, make it 20! 30! Lots of bacon!”

    (I give him his total and he drives up to the window. I go wait by soup and sandwich for his order to be ready.)

    Coworker: “30 slices of bacon on the side? On the side of what?”

    Me: “…Just bacon. 30 slices of bacon.”

    (My coworker stares blankly at me before wrapping 30 slices of bacon in a sandwich bag and giving it to me, shaking her head. I take the bacon to the window and my other coworker gives it to him.)

    Customer: “Thanks, man! Gotta have my bacon!” *drives off*

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    Putting A Bump On Their Hump Day

    , | Sydney, Australia | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

    (We currently have a promotion for nine pieces of chicken for $9.95. This is only available on Tuesdays. This story occurs on a Wednesday afternoon. A car pulls up to drive thru window.)

    Me: “Hi. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes. Can I have the Tuesday special for $9.95?”

    Me: “Erm… Today is Wednesday.”

    Customer: *blank stare*

    Me: “I can’t sell you the $9.95 deal today.”

    Customer: “Why not?”

    Me: “Because it’s a special only for Tuesdays. Today is Wednesday.”

    Customer: “But why can’t you do it for me?”

    Me: “Because we can only do it on Tuesdays. That’s why it’s called the Tuesday special. We have another deal with ten pieces and two chips, that’s $19.95 though.”

    Customer: “No, that’s too expensive. I don’t get why I can’t get a Tuesday special on a Wednesday!” *drives off*

    Has Beef With Their Non Beef Menu

    , | Chicago, IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a fast food restaurant that only sells chicken sandwiches. People often jokingly ask for burgers, so I usually try to joke back with them.)

    Customer: “So, I know you guys are a chicken place but can I just get a burger?”

    Me: “Haha! Yeah, sure… Now, what can I get for you today?”

    Customer: “A burger.”

    Me: “Sir, we really only have chicken. There is a [Competitor's store] down the street if you want a burger.”

    Customer: “Seriously, though. You don’t have any burgers back there?”

    Me: “I promise. It’s all chicken.”

    Customer: “Fine. Can I get a fish sandwich then?”

    Me: “…”

    Accentuating The Problem

    , | Paris, France | Food & Drink, Language & Words, Tourists/Travel

    (My family is on vacation in Europe with a large tour group, consisting of about 40 people from Canada and the US. My sister and I are trying to order at a Parisian McDonald’s, while a middle-aged Texan woman from the same tour is waiting in the next queue over.)

    Me: *in bad French* “Uh, could I have a… McChicken?”

    Employee: *in French* “Sorry, what did you want?”

    Me: *in French, more clearly* “Um, McChicken.”

    Employee: *in French* “Ah! Of course. That’ll be [amount].”

    Sister: *to me* “I think you were trying too hard to get the accent right. You sounded ridiculous.”

    Me: “I didn’t think it sounded that bad… At least I tried.”

    (While waiting for our food, we can’t help but overhear what’s going on in the next queue…)

    Texan Customer: “Yeah, I’d like a combo number four–”

    Employee: *in French* “Sorry, what?”

    (The woman gives the flustered employee a death stare, then speaks loudly and slowly.)

    Texan Customer: “COMBO. COOOOOMBO.”

    (We left then, so I don’t know if the customer ever got her food. To this day, no one in my family ever says the word ‘combo’ without putting on an exaggerated drawl!)

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