November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

He’s Never Finn-ished

| Helsinki, Finland | Bad Behavior, Bigotry

(A customer is buying a few items. Due to a misunderstanding that isn’t in any way my fault he almost ends up buying the wrong model of a popular phone. I apologize nonetheless and the matter is resolved. Since the misunderstanding he’s had a chip on his shoulder. He is watching me very closely and trying to catch me making a mistake. To his disgruntlement everything goes smoothly.)

Me: “…and there you go. Have a pleasant day.”

Customer: “Hmph… Boy, let me ask you a question. Where are you from?”

Me: “Helsinki.”

Customer: “No, no, no… I mean originally?”

Me: “Helsinki.”

Customer: “Stop being a smart a**! What country are you or your parents originally from?!”

(I’m a bit baffled by this question since I’m blond, have blue eyes, and a light skin. I look pretty much your stereotypical Finn.)

Me: “Finland… Um, what are you trying to ask exactly.”

Customer: “Look here, brat, stop playing this game with me! I know you immigrants like to think of yourselves as Finns, but you are not and never will be. Stop dodging my question and answer me! Where is your family from?!”

Me: “Sir, please calm yourself. I am not playing games. As far as I know my family has always lived in Finland. What makes you doubt—”

Customer: “Impossible! That just can’t be true.”

Me: “Well, sure if you are talking about the dawn of humanity; then everyone is from Africa, I guess. But my grandfather was actually a genealogy enthusiast, and he found out that our family has been living in Finland at least since the 17th century. That is pretty much as early as is possible to find any written records from Finland.”

Customer: “No, you are lying!”

Me: “Okay, look at me then. Where do you think I am from?”

Customer: “That is not for me to know but for you to tell me! I am a customer!”

(A coworker is standing at another counter with his back to us. He is of Chinese descent but was born in Finland. Only the back of his head is visible to us and he has dyed his hair blonde. He hasn´t heard my conversation with the customer.)

Customer: *shouting to my coworker* “Hey! You! Clerk over there!”

(My coworker turns to us a little surprised because of the shouting. The customer frowns as he sees my coworkers face.)

Customer: *mumbling to himself* “… Oh, god, another one.”

Coworker: “Yes, sir, can I help you?”

Customer: *pointing at me* “What country is this boy from?”

Coworker: “Umm… Finland.”

Customer: “NO! You lying son of a… Where are YOU from?!”

Coworker: “Born and raised in Helsinki.”

(The customer screams incoherently and slams his hand on the counter.)

Customer: “You are all liars, thieves, and tax dodging lazy immigrants who should never have been let into this country! I am reporting you to the consumer authority and immigration officials! This will not stand, mark my words!”

(He storms off.)

Coworker: “What was that about?”

Me: “I have absolutely no idea. A hidden camera show or an episode of The Twilight Zone are the only explanations I can think of.”

(Luckily we never heard from him again.)

Refunder Blunder, Part 12

| Surrey, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Technology

(Its ten minutes to close and I’m in the process of closing my store. A customer comes in with a store bag.)

Customer: “Hi, I bought a helicopter from you guys a few months ago. I was wondering if I could exchange it?”

Me: “Sure, what seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “My son flew it into a tree.”

Me: “All righty, I just need the receipt, and if you’ll pass me the copter I can see how much damage it’s sustained.”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t have the helicopter. It’s still in the tree. And I don’t have a receipt either, I don’t keep receipts. I brought the controller so you can see I actually bought it, and I’m not lying to you.”

Me: “Okay, the controller matches the copters we sell here, but I can’t just exchange the controller for a new box. I need the copter as well. And a receipt.”

Customer: “But I bought it here; the controller is proof!”

Me: “I don’t doubt that you bought it from here, sir, but I really do need everything that was in the box, including the helicopter, in order for me to do anything.”

Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. You’re telling me I drove two hours to merely exchange this copter for my son, and it was all in vain?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I really can’t do anything until I have the copter and a receipt.”

Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. What kind of policy is that?!”

Me: “I think you’ll find most stores exercise the same policy as we do about not having the product you’re exchanging.”

Customer: “Fine! Give me your manager’s card and I’ll be back! You haven’t heard the end of this!”

(He never came back and nothing else has come of this.)

Refunder Blunder, Part 11
Refunder Blunder, Part 10
Refunder Blunder, Part 9

Stick It To The Calculation

, | Cleveland, OH, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(A customer calls into the store about a printing calculator he recently purchased. The calculator is AC adapter powered.)

Me: “Hello. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I just bought a calculator and the numbers won’t clear off the screen.”

Me: “Okay, why don’t you reset it using the reset button on the bottom of the calculator.”

Customer: “Okay, I reset it but the numbers are still on the display. Should I unplug the power?”

Me: “Go ahead and unplug the power and try resetting it again.”

Customer: “The numbers are still on the screen, that’s not working.”

Me: “Sir, what numbers are listed on the screen?”

Customer: “One through nine.”

Me: “…Sir, is it a sticker?”

Customer: “…Oh.”

No Masters Over Me

, | UK | Bad Behavior, School

(Several young men come in and begin playing on the demonstration consoles. After a short period they begin acting very inappropriately: shouting, vulgar language, etc.  I approach the group.)

Me: “Excuse me, but I have to ask that you calm down or I am going to have to ask you to leave.”

Customer #1: “Whatever.”

Group: *sniggers*

Me: “As I said, ‘sir,’ you need to keep your voices down and your language appropriate, or I am going to have to ask you to go.”

Customer #1: “You can’t talk to me like that. I want to speak to your manager.”

Me: “I’m afraid she is unavailable. If you’d like I can call security and you can speak to them.”

Customer #1: *angry* “I’m not going to be talked down to by someone that works in a shop; you need to learn your place!”

(At this my manager had come over and, obviously seeing my anger, told me to go calm down. When I returned, the lads had gone and I went on with my day and forgot all about the incident. Several weeks later, as part of my Master’s, I was working at the university setting up for an undergraduate laboratory assessment, which I was assisting the lecturer in demonstrating. In came the undergrads, and lo and behold there was my stuck up customer sitting at the bench which I am in charge of. We exchanged a glance and at the professor’s words ‘the demonstrators will be marking you on your practical skills during the course of this assessment, which accounts for 20% of your practical marks,’ his expression changed, and this time, the entitled brat did not look as confident.)

Email Fail, Part 3

| ON, Canada | Family & Kids, Technology

(An older man is with a boy about the age of eight. I assume it’s his grandson.)

Me: “Would you like to sign up to have our coupons emailed to you?”

Customer: “No, thanks.”

Me: “Okay.”

Grandson: “He doesn’t even have Internet! Slow down with the emails!”

Email Fail, Part 2
Email Fail