November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

The Geek Shall Inherit The Earth

| Sacramento, CA, USA | Uncategorized

(I work at a well-known electronics store. I am standing by the entrance welcoming people and handing out ads. A woman comes rushing in.)

Customer: “I need help! Where are your geeks?”

Me: *trying not to laugh* “You can go over to the counter, just next to customer service. Someone there can help you.”

(About 20 minutes later, I see the woman heading to the exit.)

Me: “Did you get your problem straightened out?”

Customer: “Oh, yes. Thank you so much! I was in need of your geekiness and now everything is okay!”

My Head Megahertz

, | Henderson, NV, USA | Technology, Top

Customer: “I need a new laptop. I want one better than the one I have. I want to spend no more than 600 dollars.”

(After finding out that he has a machine running Windows 98 with 512 MB of RAM and 60 GB of hard drive space, I provide him several different laptop choices within his price range. They have either 3 GB or 4 GB of RAM, running Windows 7.)

Customer: “No, no, no! I said better! I have 512 memory, but you keep recommending only 3 and 4! Also, 7 is way lower than 98! Get me someone who knows what I mean by better!”

And The Picture Becomes Clear

, | Paris, France | Technology

(The customer arrives very angry at my desk. He nervously holds a memory card in his hand.)

Customer: “I want a new memory card. This one is really bad!”

Me: “What troubles do you have with this one?”

Customer: “It only makes blurry pictures!”

Me: “Well, I guess the problem might be the camera, not the memory card.”

Customer: “Oh, and do you have memory cards in black & white?”

Me: “Or it could be the photographer…”

Don’t Mess With Gamer Chicks

| Massachusetts, USA | Top

(A very busty, bubbly young woman comes in to buy a pre-owned copy of Resident Evil 4.)

Woman: “My stupid ex-boyfriend took all my games when he moved out! He doesn’t even like Resident Evil!”

Me: “Wow, that sucks.”

Woman: “It’s fine. I hooked up with his brother. I don’t start s***, I end it. Mess with my games and it is ON.”

Me: *laughing*

(I ended up giving her a discount.)

I’m Having My iPeriod

, | New Zealand | Uncategorized

Customer: “Hi there, darling. Uh, I was wondering, do you have any pads?”

Me: “Do you mean iPads?”

Customer: “Yeah pads, iPads, whatever. Can you show me where they are?”

Me: “Sure, ma’am. Are you interested in the iPad or the iPad 2?”

Customer: “Wait…so, like, you use the iPad at day and the iPad 2 at night?”