In The Place Of No Return

| TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Technology, Top

(An older person walks into the store with their gaming laptop.)

Employee: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “I have a virus on my computer. I had antivirus software, so I want to return it.”

Employee: “Did you update your antivirus software?”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to. They should include every virus!”

Employee: “New viruses come out every day. Can I see your receipt?”

Customer: *hands over receipt*

Employee: “This is from [Competitor].”

Customer: “So? You sell computers. You should take it back. And you have pay me $100 for every hour I spend downloading my games again. I have DIALUP!”

Employee: “You will need to return this to [Competitor].”

Customer: “They said no.”

Employee: “Would you like a new computer?”

Customer: “I’d like to speak to your manager.”

Employee: “I’m the manager.”

Customer: “You have horrible customer service.”

Employee: “That’s because I reserve it for CUSTOMERS.”

Electronic Moronic

| Augusta, GA, USA | Crazy Requests, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(I work at a big box electronics store, which is all we sell, and am answering the phones.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “I need your electronics department.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Which section?”

Caller: “Your electronics department.”

Me: “We are only an electronics store, ma’am. Did you need computers, TVs, phones?”

Caller: “Electronics, please. I have already told you this.”

Me: “Yes, and as I have said we only sell electronics and I need to know what you are looking for.”

Caller: “Godd*** it, I already told you. Electronics!”

Me: “Please hold.”

(I place the customer on hold and turn to a coworker.)

Me: “Answer this and just say electronics so we can find out what she needs.”

Door Busted

| Pittsburgh, PA, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Holidays

(A customer comes into the store three days after Black Friday.)

Customer: “Yeah. I’m looking for that Toshiba TV you had for Black Friday.”

Me: “The exclusive one that we carry?”

Customer: “I think so.”

Me: “The door buster deal that no other competitor could beat?”

Customer: “Sounds like the one.”

Me: “The product that 1,000 people got in line for days in advance in order to be the first and only ones to get it?”

Customer: “Yep, that’s th— Oh… ”

Me: “Yeah… About that…”

Customer: “Yeah. Never mind.”