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  • Time To Tail The Knot

    | Canada | Pets & Animals

    (At the kennel where I’m the receptionist, we offer a discount if two dogs can share the same run.)

    Customer: “Can you tell me your pricing?”

    Me: “Sure, it’s [price] per dog per night, unless you have two dogs who can share a run. You’re just looking for a single?”

    Customer: *completely serious* “Yes, my dog’s not married.”

    Self-Deluded Dogma

    | San Antonio, TX, USA |

    Customer: “An emergency just came up. I need to board my dogs for the next week.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but it’s December 24th and we’re completely booked for the holidays.”

    Customer: “But I have to leave town. Can’t they stay with you?”

    Me: “We don’t have any space for them. Our waiting list has already been notified about cancellations and they have filled those spots.”

    Customer: “You just don’t understand! My dogs are very well behaved and I’m leaving town tomorrow. I’ll just drop them off in the morning.”

    Me: “Please don’t do that. There is absolutely no room for your dogs here.”

    Customer: “Are you asking me to cancel my trip?! Listen, young lady! I’ve been planning this vacation for 3 months and I will not be stopped now!”

    Me: “Is this your emergency?”

    Customer:: *click*