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    Online And Over The Line

    | USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Technology, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a craft store with two entrances; each entrance has multiple registers. I am on the register called ‘side door.’ At the time of this transaction, I am a new hire and am highly concerned with not breaking company policy about coupons.)

    Me: “Hello, did you find everything all right?”

    Customer: “Yeah, thanks. Do you have any coupons right now?”

    Me: “Yes, there’s currently a 40% off of one regular priced item going on right now.”

    (At this point, I haven’t realized that she was asking me if I had any coupons with me at the register, which I don’t. Employees are required to throw them away if we don’t scan them from a phone.)

    Customer: “Okay, great, I want to use it on [item].”

    Me: *after scanning the item* “All righty, because this item is your highest priced, regular priced item, the coupon should work.”

    (The customer starts typing on her smartphone, and I finish ringing up the items she put on my counter. When she looks up, she stops me to examine the items.)

    Customer: “Oh. That one’s not on sale?”

    Me: “No, it’s not.”

    Customer: “Okay. Can I use a coupon on that one too?”

    Me: “Unfortunately, no. It’s only one of this kind of coupon per transaction, per customer, per day. I’m sorry.”

    Customer: *suddenly getting irate* “Okay, I don’t have the money to be spending on these both.” *she has trouble deciding on which item to keep, and a line starts to form behind her, making her even more irate* “Look, is there any way you can let it slide? Other cashiers have let it slide before…”

    Me: “I’m really sorry, but I can’t use two of this kind of coupon in the same transaction for the same customer.”

    Customer: *with an impatient sigh* “Fine, you know what? I’ll just take this one.” *she goes back to texting while I take the item off of the transaction*

    Me: “Okay, I can scan your coupon for you, ma’am.”

    Customer: *with an are-you-stupid look* “You said you had a coupon.”

    Me: “Oh, um… I can pull this week’s coupon up on your phone for you? Unfortunately, I don’t have any back here.”

    Customer: *now very annoyed, for no real reason that I understand; she also refuses to let me see the screen of her phone to navigate the badly designed store website* “Okay, so how do I do that?”

    Me: “In the browser, go to [site name].”

    (I radio in for backup, not because the line is long, but because I know that pulling the coupon up on the site takes a while. The customer shoots me an annoyed look when I do this.)

    Customer: “Okay, I’m on the site, now what?” *she’s taken an imperious tone with me by now*

    Me: “There should be a small icon in the corner of the screen you can tap that gives you a popup side-bar menu-thing.”

    (I watch as she struggles with this, again asking if I can help her navigate the site and again getting refused.)

    Customer: “Okay, so what do I tap on now? Weekly Ad?” *she sounds extremely irate, impatiently glaring at me when she has the chance*

    Me: “I’m not really sure, but that should be the right thing, unless you see a ‘coupons’ button?”

    Customer: “I don’t see a coupons button.”

    Me: “Oh, okay, it’s in the weekly ad, then. Sometimes the site acts differently on different phones, depending on whether or not you have the app—”

    (I get told over radio that there’s no backup for me, and the line continues to pile up and my customer gets more agitated.)

    Customer: “Look, I don’t need you to lecture me right now about this. Just tell me how to get the d*** coupon!”

    Me: *taking a slow breath of air to calm my nerves, as this is my first angry customer* “Okay, once the screen loads, tap on the right side that says coupons.”

    Customer: *irritated, taking offence to the deep breath* “I don’t like your tone. I want you to call your manager.”

    (I call my manager, who tells me that she’ll be a couple minutes because of the store being busy and so few of us employees to keep up with the rush.)

    Me: “Unfortunately, the store is a little busy and my manager won’t be here for a little bit. I’m sorry.”

    Customer: “Yeah, sure, whatever. Make excuses.”

    (The customer manages to pull up the coupon after I help her a little more, continuing to give me death glares.)

    Me: “Okay, that brings your total down. Your receipt is in your bag and a coupon for next week. Have a good rest of the day.”

    (The customer just glares at me, then seeing my manager who just walked up behind me and paling a little, gives me a half-a**ed threat to write me up online and literally flees the store.)

    Manager: *to me* “Okay, so, what just happened?”

    (I explain the situation, while my other customers patiently wait for me.)

    Manager: “All righty, then. Don’t worry, she won’t be writing anything. She was just having a bad day.”

    (My manager left, and the rest of my customers were very polite and sweet for the rest of the day. It’s been almost five months since that incident, and no, I never did get a bad online review from it.)

    Crime Has Reached A Tipping Point

    , | YK, Canada | Criminal/Illegal, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I’m at a local fair selling my arts and crafts. One of the things I do is make pins on the spot for people, and I have a sample of each pin design on display on a board. They’re very popular with kids as they’re only $2 each, so there are a few kids at the table. Most are pretty young, but this one was about 10.)

    Older Kid: “Can I have a pin of [design]?”

    Me: “Sure! $2 please!”

    Older Kid: *puts a $5 bill on the table*

    Me: “Okay, just one second. Let me just make it for you!”

    (I make the pin, and then hand it to the kid and pick up the $5.)

    Me: “Here you go, kiddo! Let me just get you your change!”

    Older Kid: “Thanks!” *he looks at the board, then suddenly grabs a display pin and RUNS from the table*

    Husband: *sitting next to me* “… Did he just steal a pin?”

    Me: *holds up the $5 bill* “Looks more like he tipped us!”

    Shouldn’t Be Listening

    | UT, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Money

    (I am a cashier at a popular craft store. A woman is purchasing lots of items for her daughter’s upcoming birthday party. Most of these items are little things, like individual lip balms and wrapped candies. We don’t have scanners at this store, so it takes me a good seven or so minutes to ring up all her items.)

    Customer: “This is all for my daughter’s birthday! Isn’t it wonderful?”

    Me: “Yes, it is. How old is she turning?”

    Customer: “Three. And she’s mommy’s little princess. She’s my pageant winner. We spend so much on pageants! Oh, it’s so expensive. I really shouldn’t be buying her all this for her birthday.”

    (The customer goes on and one like this as I ring up all her items. She keeps talking about her daughter’s pageants. Her little girl is sitting in the cart with a lollypop in her mouth, apparently too young to care about big birthday parties and pageants.)

    Me: “Do you have a coupon to use today?”

    Customer: “Yes, I do. 40% off right here.”

    (Her sum is quite large, so I make sure she understands.)

    Me: “You do realize that this is for 40% off one individual item, right?”

    Customer: “Oh, yes, yes. And it’s great because I really shouldn’t be buying all this. I really don’t have a lot of money.”

    (The customer doesn’t seem to have understood what I said about 40% off one item, not the entire purchase. After clarifying one more time, I process the coupon and finish the transaction. About ten minutes later she comes rushing back into the store.)

    Customer: “I didn’t get 40% off my purchase! I told you I shouldn’t be buying all of this.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I did tell you several times before finishing your transaction that the coupon was for 40% off one item, not the entire purchase. You told me you understood.”

    Customer: “Fine, Then I want to return most of this.”

    (She then proceeded to unload all the individual lip balms and candies she had purchased. It took me another ten minutes to process her refund, and then she swept out of the store muttering about how expensive the birthday party was turning out to be.)

    A Crime Against Closing Time

    | UT, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

    (I am working the register at a craft store. We are getting close to closing time, and make announcements over the PA system about every five minutes or so, warning customers to finish their purchases. About once a month there is a customer who comes in and wanders right up until the closing time before she comes to the register. Being at register one, I am the last cashier to close my till and have to wait until we’ve finished helping every customer that was in the store before we close the doors.)

    Me: “Did you find everything all right tonight, ma’am?”

    Customer: *sighs* “I suppose.”

    (As I ring up her purchases, she grabs a weekly ad from beside my register.)

    Customer: “Ooh, spring items are 40% off. Can I go look really fast before you finish ringing me up?”

    Me: “Ma’am, we’re closed.”

    Customer: “I’ll be quick.”

    Me: “Ma’am, you have already looked back there. We are closed, and as soon as I’m done with your transaction I am closing my till. If you’d like to take a look at our spring sale, you can come back tomorrow morning. We open at 10 am.”

    Customer: “I just want one item. I promise I’ll be quick.”

    (We are 15 minutes past closing, all my coworkers have closed their tills and cleaned up their respective areas, and are standing up at the front waiting, since we all have to leave the store together.)

    Me: “Ma’am, we are closed. And your total is [amount].”

    (The customer pays and trundles out of the store, finally.)

    Manager: “Way to be firm. I thought I was going to have to drag her out of the store.”

    Rage Against The Machine, Part 3

    | USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I have finished ringing up a customer’s purchase when he is paying with a debit card at the card reader. My computer tells me the customer clicked the ‘cancel’ button on the machine.)

    Me: “Sir, please re-slide your card and press the green button for credit.”

    Customer: *to his wife* “They should make these things all work the same way.”

    Customer’s Wife: “Honey, it says right there to press the green button for credit.”

    Customer: “I shouldn’t be expected to read that.”

    Related:
    Rage Against The Machine, Part 2
    Rage Against The Machine

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