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    Hug And A Smile Make It All Worth While

    | Dallas, TX, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

    (I am standing in line to check out at a local convenience store. The employees are very busy with what appears to be a massive restocking job. One employee has taken a 30 second break to get a drink when a child who can’t be older than 7 speaks up to her.)

    Child: “You’re not smiling. You have to smile! Everyone has to smile!”

    Employee: “Aw, I’m sorry, I’m just busy.” *smiles a little for the child*

    Child: “You know what you deserve?”

    Employee: “No, what’s that?”

    Child: “A hug!”

    (The child hugs the employee.)

    Employee: “Aw, thank you!”

    (The entire place seemed to brighten up after this and the kid’s parents couldn’t stop grinning either. It brightened all our days!)

    Hats Off To Idiocy

    | Charleston, WV, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Holidays, Top

    (It is New Year’s day/night. I am working the graveyard shift and I have a pair of friends at the store keeping me company. A customer comes in and is casually walking the aisles. My friends and I continue talking, but I keep an eye on him. The customer heads for the door without buying anything, but I notice a hat rack hanging from the ceiling, swinging wildly.)

    Me: “Excuse me, sir?”

    (The customer stops by the door, holding his jacket closed.)

    Customer: “Yeah?”

    Me: “I’m really sorry, and I’m sure I’m mistaken, but would you mind opening your jacket?”

    Customer: “Why do you want me to do that?”

    Me: “Again, I’m sure I’m mistaken, and I do apologize, but I need to make sure you didn’t forget to pay for a hat.”

    Customer: “How dare you accuse me of stealing! I don’t have to do what you say!”

    Me: “Sir, if you don’t I’ll have to—”

    (At this point, the customer darts out the door. I know we’re not supposed to, but I am angry that this guy would steal from me. I hop the counter and start running for the door. The customer sees me and takes off running. I chase him across the parking lot and start across the street after him when my better judgement kicks in. I go back inside, but am surprised to see my friends laughing really hard.)

    Me: “What’s so funny?!”

    One Of My Friends: “Dude! His car is right there! Parked outside!”

    (I call the police, who arrive and check his trunk. The customer had had a busy night, and had stolen from a few other stores. A cop is taking my statement when we see a woman get in the customer’s car and start it up.)

    Cop: *to the woman* “What are you doing?”

    Woman: “…Oh, my husband is drunk and forgot that he had driven the car to the store. I’m just picking it up.”

    (Sensing an opportunity, the cop slyly smiles at me, before continuing to speak to the woman.)

    Cop: “Okay, go ahead…”

    (The woman gets in the car and drives off, unwittingly leading the cop to her home. I testified in court a few weeks later.)

    Time For Giving And Receiving, Part 2

    | Robeline, LA, USA | Awesome Customers, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (My coworker, who has just gotten off shift, is leaning against the counter talking to me when an older gentleman walks in.)

    Me: *smiling* “Good evening and Merry Christmas!”

    Customer: *frowning* “Why are you here? It’s Christmas!”

    Coworker: *smiling* “Well, we don’t close for Christmas. She’s closing up shop, but I’ve just gotten off and am about to go home.”

    Customer: *suddenly grinning* “Wait right here!” *turns on his heel and goes out the door*

    Coworker: “…Okay, what was that?”

    Me: “I have no idea!”

    (The customer returns and gives my coworker a $20 bill then lays one on the counter in front of me.)

    Customer: “Merry Christmas, ladies, and a Happy New Year too!”

    (We both stare after him as he walks out, gets into his SUV and leaves. We then look at each other.)

    Coworker: “Wow, that’s the nicest thing anyone’s done all day!”

    Me: “Well, this is the season for miracles, isn’t it?”

    (I still have no idea who that man was!)

    Happy Holidaze

    | Norman, OK, USA | At The Checkout, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I am a customer in line at a convenience store. There is one man in front of me who pays for a chocolate milk and leaves. As the cashier is checking me out, the customer with the chocolate milk comes barging back into the store.)

    Customer: “Dude, you need to let me exchange this milk. It is out of date!”

    Cashier: “Of course. If the milk is out of date, you may certainly get another one.”

    (The cashier takes the milk and sets it aside without looking at it while he continues to check me out. The customer disappears toward the back of the store and then comes stomping back to the counter less than a minute later.)

    Customer: “ALL of your milks are out of date! What sort of place is this?!”

    Cashier: “Really? We just had a delivery…” *checks the date of the chocolate milk he set aside earlier* “This milk is still good! It says December 12th.”

    Customer: “Dude, the 12th was at the BEGINNING of the month! We’re at the END of the month!”

    Cashier: “No, sir. Today is December 10th.”

    Customer: “Nuh-uh! Today is the 26th! Yesterday was Christmas!”

    (The cashier shows the customer a calendar hanging behind the counter.)

    Cashier: “No, sir. We haven’t had Christmas yet. It’s only December 10th, and Christmas isn’t until the 25th.”

    Customer: *dazed look* “Dude…I like, dreamed that yesterday was Christmas! I guess I didn’t get a new car from my Grandma, either. I thought somebody stole it!” *takes his milk and leaves*

    Coffee, Strong, And Proud

    | Concord, NH, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bigotry, Top

    (Note: during the course of this conversation the customer uses several degrading terms for people of Middle-Eastern and African descent.)

    Customer #1: *slaps a $10 bill on the counter* “I’ll have a pack of [racial slur] delights.”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer #1: “You know, [different racial slur] specials! You know, the cigarettes the [yet another racial slur] make!”

    Me: “You mean Camels?”

    Customer #1: “That’s what I said I wanted, isn’t it?”

    Me: “Not even close. You used several highly offensive racial slurs, but not once did you ask for a pack of cigarettes.”

    Customer #1: “Whatever. Just get me the f***ing cigarettes!”

    Me: “Yeah, that’s not happening. I’m exercising my right to refuse you service. The door’s right over there, have a nice day!”

    Customer #1: “You’re kidding, right? What the f*** is your problem?”

    Me: “It’s simple, really. If someone is bothering other customers, I am required to kick them out of the store. Your crude and abusive language is clearly bothering the customers in line behind you, so there you go. Goodbye.”

    Customer #1: “What the f*** is wrong with you! What’s wrong with calling a [slur] a [slur]? They’re all f***ing [slurs], and you’re all a bunch of f***ing b****ds. You hear me? You’re all—”

    (At this point Customer #1 turns around to yell at the other people in line, but cuts off as he catches sight of the customer right behind him. Customer #2 is a male African-American that could accurately be described as ‘terrifyingly enormous’. It should also be noted that one of the slurs Customer #1 has been using was aimed at African-Americans.)

    Customer #1: “Whoa, man. I said ‘sand [slur]‘. I don’t have any problem with you!”

    Customer #2: *stares down at Customer #1* “Lemme see if I’ve got this right. You’re a loud-mouthed, ignorant, bigoted a**hole, but that shouldn’t bother me because you don’t have a problem with me specifically?”

    Customer #1: “Uh, yes?”

    Customer #2: “Uh, no. The nice man behind the counter asked you to leave the store. I suggest you do so before I decide you need some help getting through the door.”

    (Customer #1 immediately flees out the door, allowing Customer #2 to put his four coffees on the counter.)

    Customer #2: “Just the coffees, my friend.”

    Me: “Dude, the look on that guy’s face was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. For that, and for helping me out, your coffee is on me.”

    (The next day I told my manager what happened. After reviewing the security tapes (and laughing for a good 20 minutes) she gave me a nearly half a box of free coffee vouchers to give Customer #2. When I quit two years later, he still hadn’t run out of them.)


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