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  • When Rants Get Real

    | Durham, NC, USA | Books & Reading, Politics, Religion

    (These customers are usually regulars and rant with us.)

    Customer: “Those d*** telemarketers keep calling me at home. I swear, one of these days, I’m going to find those f***s and gun them down!”

    Me: “Aww, that’s hardly fair. They’re just doing their job, you know?”

    Customer: “Yeah, well that’s what the Nazis said at Nuremberg.”

    Me: “Are you honestly trying to comparing somebody calling you at home inconveniently equal to genocide?”

    Customer: “D*** right it is. They should do something about it too! Hold a trial or something.”

    Me: “Sir, I don’t think it’s really fair to make that sort of judgment on any individual.”

    Customer: “Oh, so you’re saying that what the Nazis did was okay?”

    Me: “Not at all. Just that it’s a bit of a stretch.”

    Customer: “Uh huh…you seem like the kind of guy who’d stand up for the terrorists, too wouldn’t you? I bet if they built a mosque on Ground Zero, you’d be okay with that, too!?”

    Me: “They’re already doing that.”

    Customer: “Wait, what!?”

    But Is It Fully Armed And Operational?

    , | Birmingham, UK | Geeks Rule

    Customer: “Hi there, I was wondering if you could help me?”

    Me: “Of course. What are you after?”

    Customer: “Well, my son is a huge Star Wars fan and he really wants one of those Lightsabers.”

    Me: “Not a problem, we have plenty of them. Was there any particular one you were after.”

    Customer: “Do you have one of the ones that come out of the handle?”

    Me: “We have several pop-out ones, they also make a sound.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay.”

    (They walk off and pick some of the different designs up and walk back to me.)

    Customer: “Hi again.”

    Me: “Did you find one?”

    Customer: “Not the one that he wants.”

    Me: “Well we also have some better ones in the window, would you like to see?”

    Customer: “Yes, please”

    (I get a prop Lightsaber out of the window and show it to them.)

    Customer: “Hmm, it doesn’t seem to be the right one.”

    Me: “Unfortunately, that’s all we really do.”

    Customer: “So you don’t do the one that cuts things?”

    Me: “Erm, the ones that cut things?”

    Customer: “You know, the ones from the movies.”

    Me, giving up: “Erm… you could try the Entertainer, they should do them.”

    Customer: “Brilliant, thanks very much.”

    (If this wasn’t bad enough, it’s happened about 3 times in the past year.)