Customer: “Is your honey croissant vegan?”
Me: “Uh… no, ma’am. It’s made with butter and honey.”
Customer: “Oh, but those are okay!”
Me: “Those are okay if you’re a vegetarian, but not if you’re a vegan.”
Customer: “Oh… what’s the difference?”
Me: “The difference between…?”
Customer: “Vegetarian and vegan?”
Me: “Uh… a vegetarian doesn’t eat meat, and a vegan doesn’t eat any product that’s produced by an animal, like dairy products or honey.”
Customer: “Oh… I thought it was a brand.”
Me: “A brand?”
Customer: “Yeah, my friend said they lost weight on the vegan diet and that you had a lot of vegan products. I wanted to try the vegan products.”
Me: “Ma’am, vegan means a choice to not eat certain things. It’s not a brand.”
Customer: “I see.”
Me: “So, what would you like?”
Customer: “Is the chocolate cake vegan?”
Me: “…no, ma’am.”
Customer: “Oh. I’ll have that anyway. I’ll start my diet tomorrow.”
Me: “Of course, ma’am.”
Customer: “Will you have vegan products in tomorrow?”
Me: “We have vegan products now. The brownies are vegan.”
Customer: “So, I’ll lose weight with the vegan brownies?”
Me: “Ma’am, they’re not healthier because they’re vegan. They’re just not made with animal products.”
Customer: “I see.”
I’m beginning to think that when she says, “I see,” it means the opposite.
Customer: “Is your meatloaf vegan?”
Me: “No. That contains meat.”
Customer: “This is so confusing. You should sell vegan products.”
Me: “We do, ma’am, just not the meat or dairy products.”
Customer: “Can you call the vegans and ask them to ship some?”
Me: “Call the vegans?”
Customer: “The company. The vegan company. It’s really bad that you don’t keep their products in stock.”
Me: “Ma’am, once again: vegan isn’t a brand or a company. It’s the name given to a person who chooses not to consume meat or animal products.”
Customer: “I see.”
She did not see.
Related:
She’ll Probably Run Into This Problem Vegan And Again
