October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

The Aura-oma Of Fresh Coffee

| Lakeville, MN, USA | Uncategorized

(A customer orders a Zebra Mocha, but requests ‘love’. I add the note ‘Please make with love!’ to the order. I give the drink to her, and she takes a sip.)

Customer: “Hey! I wanted it made with LOVE! I can taste the despair and hatred!”

Me: “Sorry, do you want me to remake it?”

Customer: “No! I want someone else to make it. You reek of hate and despair and sadness. I want LOVE!”

Me: “Um…okay. Well, I’m the only one here, so can I give you a refund or remake it?”

Customer: “Fine, but remember the LOVE.”

Me: *remakes drink* “Here you go…honey!”

Customer: “Thanks!”

If The Brew Fits…

| California, USA | Uncategorized

(We’ve run out of flat lids for our large cold drinks, so we’re using the domed ones instead.)

Coworker: “I have a large iced green tea ready.”

Customer: “Does it LOOK like I want whipped cream on that!?”

Coworker: “I’m really sorry, ma’am, but unfortunately we are all out of the flat lids for the venti sized drinks. I have to put a dome lid–”

(The customer points to small-sized flat lids.)

Customer: “Those are flat lids!”

Coworker: “Actually, those only fit our small iced cups.”

(The customer rolls her eyes, grabs a small flat lid, and tries to put it on her large cup. Because it’s smaller, the lid falls into her drink and spills tea all over the counter.)

Customer: “WHY WON’T THIS FIT!?”

Disco Stu Does Not Approve

| Portland, OR, USA | Bizarre, Top, Wild & Unruly

(A man walks into our crowded coffee shop and yells at the top of his lungs.)


Supervisor: “Oh no, it’s a robbery!” *begins to call security*

Man: “…on the DANCE FLOOR!”

(The man then “dances” up to the front, past shocked customers, grabs a bottle of water, and “dances” out of the store. Security nabs him outside the door.)

Time For An Allergic Retraction

| Colorado, USA | Top

Customer: “Can I have the breakfast sandwich without tomato, please?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, but the sandwich is pre-made. You can just take the tomato off it, if you want.”

Customer: “No! I’m extremely allergic to tomatoes. That could kill me!”

Me: “Well, if you want to wait five minutes or so, I’ll make you one special without tomatoes.”

Customer: “That would be great.”

(I go to the kitchen, wash everything that might have touched a tomato, and make the guy a sandwich. I come back out and hand it to him.)

Customer: “Thanks. You got any ketchup?”

Barking Up Your Own Tree

| Maryland, USA | Uncategorized

(Note: our coffee shop shares a building with a Mexican fast food place.)

Me: “Good afternoon. This is [coffee shop], *** speaking.”

Caller: “Hey, are you guys right beside [Mexican fast food place]?”

Me: “Yeah, just come in the same door.”

Caller: “Actually, I want to order from them, but they aren’t answering their phone.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Their manager comes in here fairly often. I’ll let him know he’s missing calls.”

Caller: “Will you go over and place my order for me and have it delivered?”

Me: “Ahh‚ĶI can’t do that. I don’t work for them.”

Caller: “Please? It will just take a moment.¬†I can’t leave work.”

Me: “Neither can I, sir.”

Page 54/68First...5253545556...Last