(I’ve just finished making a sandwich for a customer. I am new at this, so he double checks what I do.)
Customer: “Did you forget anything?”
Me: “No, sir.”
Customer: “Are you sure? You remembered the cucumbers and turkey?”
Me: “Yes.”
Customer: “And the lettuce?”
Me: “And the tomatoes, pickles, mustard and mayo, sir. It’s written on the–”
Customer: “Mayo? What the h*** is that? And you left out the mayonnaise! Why did you do that?”
Me: “But, that’s what I said.”
Customer: “No! You said mayo! That’s not what I wanted!”
Me: “I put in mayonnaise. Mayo is just an abbreviation.”
Customer: “Abbreviation? What’s that, some kind of fruit?”
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Customer: “I need something without coffee in it.”
Me: “Ok, what would you like?”
Customer: “Can I have a large mocha?”
Me: “That has coffee in it, ma’am.”
Customer: “No, it doesn’t. It says espresso on the board.”
Me: “Espresso is coffee.”
Customer: “All this time I’ve been drinking coffee!? No wonder I haven’t been able to sleep!”
Related:
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Customer: “I’d like a grande white mocha and a tall peppermint hot chocolate.”
Me: “Alright, that’ll be $*.**.”
Customer: “What? For one drink? That’s impossible!”
Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, miss. I thought I heard you order two drinks. What did you order?”
Customer: “A tall peppermint hot chocolate.”
Me, to coworker: “Forget the white mocha.”
Customer: “No! I still want it!”
Me: “Oh, so you just wanted me to ring the two drinks separately?”
Customer: “No! I want it, but I don’t want you to ring it up.”
Me: *blank stare*
Customer: “Oh. I guess I’m not getting away with it, am I?”
Me: “Nope.”
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Me: “Excuse me, madam. How may I help you?”
Customer: “Thanks, I’ll have a ‘MochaChinaFrappaLatte’ please.”
Me: “Sorry, madam, but those are each separate coffees. Mocha, cappuccino, frappe and a latte?”
Customer: “Oh. I just heard it on TV and I thought it sounded cool…”
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Customer: “Are you on the show [T.V. show]?”
Me: “Pardon me?”
Customer: “You know the show [T.V. show]? Are you on it? Cause you really look like a character on it.”
Me: “No, I am sorry I am not.”
Customer: “Are you lying to me? I am pretty sure you are that girl from [T.V. show]!”
Me: “No, I work at [coffee shop], not on a television show.”
(This went on until my manager had to step in.)
Manager: *sarcastically* “Yes she is on [T.V. show], she just likes to fly hundreds of kilometers back to Wasaga to work at [coffee shop] because she needs extra money.”
Customer: “I knew it!”
(Later on, she brought her boyfriend back and tried to convince me to give her an autograph.)
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