October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 7

| Vancouver Island, BC, Canada | Crazy Requests, Transportation

(A customer storms in waving his contract in the air.)

Customer: “I want this insurance coverage OFF! I returned this car yesterday and I realized today that the insurance coverage is still on here!”

Me: “Okay, let me have a look. It looks as though you accepted our collision coverage on the vehicle when you picked up.”

Customer: “But I didn’t even get in an accident so I would like a refund.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, we can’t refund you for that just because you did not get into an accident. You agreed to take the collision coverage and would have signed for it on your contract.”

Customer: “No, this is stupid. I want this taken off now.”

Me: “I’m sorry. You have signed off on a legally binding contracting accepting our collision coverage for the four days you rented a car from us.”

Customer: “Well, I didn’t even look at what I was signing so it’s not my fault.”

Me: “We go over every contract verbally with our customers and explain each part that we need a signature on. We also do not add coverage on without discussing it with our customers first so it seems you agreed to it at the time.”


Me: “Again, sir, I’m really sorry, but you signed for this on a legal contract.”

Customer: “Let me speak to your manager NOW!”

Me: “Absolutely.”

(My manager has been sitting in the back office listening the entire time. He walks out, and the customer repeats everything again.)

Manager: “Sir, you put your signature down on a legal contract accepting this coverage. I wish that I could get a full refund on my yearly insurance just because I did not get into an accident, but unfortunately it does not work that way.”

Customer: “Well I didn’t read what I was signing. This is f****** ridiculous. I ACCIDENTALLY SIGNED IT!”

Manager: “WELL, THEN, WE ACCIDENTALLY COVERED YOU AND THE VEHICLE, NOW DIDN’T WE? I suggest next time you put yourself in the position of signing a LEGAL DOCUMENT that you will spend time reading it and pay attention when someone explains it to you.”

(The customer promptly left.)

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 6
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 5
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 4

Driving You Crazy, Part 2

| CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Transportation

(It is the Friday before Memorial Day, and we only have enough cars for people who made reservations in advance. My coworker and I check our reservation sheet regularly and call any same-day reservations to tell them we do not have a car for them, and to check back at the end of the day in case of no-shows. We cannot reach one such customer, who comes in only an hour after making her reservation.)

Customer: “My name is [Customer], and I have a reservation for a car now.”

Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am, but due to the holiday weekend, we are completely out of cars right now. I tried calling you—”

Customer: “How DARE you tell me you’re out of cars! I made a reservation! I demand a car!”

Me: “I understand you made a reservation, which is why I tried to call you as soon as possible to explain the situation. We will have more cars coming in about two hours, and if any come earlier, I will be happy to call you and let you know.”

Customer: “I don’t believe this! Can’t you tell I’m dropping this off at the airport? I need a car now!”

(Her reservation does confirm she is dropping her car off at an airport, but it is a two-day rental and the airport is about an hour away.)

Me: “I see that, ma’am. Unfortunately, that does not change the fact that we do not have a car for you on such short notice. As you can see, there are no cars in our parking lot right now. I’m not trying to keep one from you.”

Customer: “This is unbelievable! I am a [Rewards Club] member! I am guaranteed a car when I reserve it!”

Me: “You are guaranteed a car if you make a reservation at least 24 hours in advance. And because you are a member, you are put at the top of our list when more cars come in in the next couple of hours. Otherwise, I would be telling you to come around closing in case of no-shows.”

Customer: “I work for this company! I work at [Other Location]! I know how things work around here!”

(My patience has worn thin at this point. It is my second to last day at this job, my next job is secured, and I know there will be no real consequences if this customer ends up complaining to my manager.)

Me: “Then honestly, you should have known better than to make a same-day reservation at a small location on a holiday weekend.”

(The customer’s jaw drops, but she remains silent.)

Me: “As I said, I would be happy to give you a call as soon as we have a car for you, which will likely be in an hour or two. Is there a number I can better reach you at than [cell phone number on file]?”

Customer: “No… no, that’s a good number… I’ll wait for your call.”

(The customer literally ran out the door, which only barely closed behind her before my coworker burst into a laughing fit at my comment and the customer’s response. We had an unexpected return fifteen minutes later, and I rented that car to the customer less than an hour after her reservation.)


Driving You Crazy

Time For A Time-Out

| Maui, Hawaii, USA | Crazy Requests

Customer: “Can you tell me the name of the shopping complex that has the bus stop near you?”

Me: “Yes, just a moment while I look it up.”

Customer: “Can you ask someone near you?”

Me: “It’ll just take me a couple seconds to look it up. Just a moment, please.”

(I find it.)

Me: “It’s the [Name] shopping center.”

Customer: “I know you have someone there next to you. Can you please ask them?”

Me: “There is only me at the desk. There is no one else near me.”

Customer: “Please ask someone who lives there. I want to be sure.”

Me: “Let me put you on hold a moment.”

Customer: “Thank you.”

(The customer is then placed in time-out, also known as ‘hold,’ while I do a face-palm and practice some deep-breathing techniques. After about a minute, I return to the phone call.)

Me: “It’s [Name] shopping center.”

Customer: “Thank you so much for checking with someone; I appreciate it.”

Me: “Sure, no problem.”

He Might Need A Smart Car

| Buffalo, NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Transportation

(A customer is waiting in line while I take care of renting a car for another customer. It takes about five minutes, and just as I am finishing up with him, the guy in line throws up his hands in frustration.)

Customer: “Ugh, this is taking forever! This isn’t that difficult, sweetheart!”

Me: “Be right with you. I’m almost done.”

Customer: “Well, I’m a premium member. I’m supposed to pick out my car and not even deal with you. Why the hell do I have to wait here?”

Me: “Oh, the premium members just go downstairs to pick out a car. You actually don’t have to wait for me.”

Customer: “It’d be nice if you had a f****** sign! Way to waste my time!”

Me: “Sir, you’re standing right next to a giant sign that says what I just told you.”

(Customer looks to his right, where there is indeed a giant, standing sign at eye level.)

Customer: “Oh, bet you think you’re so smart.” *stomps off*

Me: “That’s not exactly what I was thinking…”

Bugging Out About It

| NE, USA | Money, Theme Of The Month, Transportation

(We always know in the summer rental cars will come back with lots of dead bugs on the front bumper and windshield. This was a joke we used frequently.)

Me: “Wow, looks like you hit a lot of bugs on the road out there!”

Customer: “Yeah. I was out on a lot of country roads.”

Me: “You know it’s a $1 per bug cleaning charge, right?”

Customer: *immediately irate, stands up in a huff* “THAT IS OUTRAGEOUS. I WILL NOT PAY THAT! I WANT TO SEE YOUR MANAGER!”

Me: “Whoa. Just a little joke, sir.”

Customer: *sitting down, still upset* “Well, that’s stupid. And not funny.

(I stopped telling the bug joke after that…)

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