Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Making A Mute Point
    (2,374 thumbs up)
  • April Themed Story Giveaway: Creepy Customers!
    Submit your story today!

    Education Is Wasted On The Young

    | Ohio, USA |

    (A number comes across the screen with the same area code as my hometown.)

    Me: “Hi, this is [name]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I was wondering if you could give me the number for the store in [town]. I live over in [town I grew up in].”

    Me: “Sure thing. So you live in [town]? I grew up there. I just graduated in ’06.”

    Customer: “Oh wow! What a small world! I graduated in ’82.”

    Me: “That’s awesome. Okay, that number is [number].”

    Customer: “Thanks! Wow, 1906…that’s incredible.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I graduated in 2006, not 1906.”

    Customer: “Oh, no wonder you sound so young!”

    Cold Calling

    | California, USA | Bizarre

    Caller: “Hello, may I speak to Mr. Ralph ******?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, he’s dead.”

    Caller: “Oh, I’m very sorry for your loss.”

    Me: “It’s okay. It’s been 20 years. I think we’re over it.”

    No Paws For Thought

    | Canada | Pets & Animals, Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Hello, [Public Transport], how can I help you?”

    Caller: “Hi, do you allow cats on your buses?”

    Me: “No, I’m sorry, but only service animals are allowed on the bus.”

    Caller: “But she’s a very quiet cat! The airline let me take her!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but those are the rules. We can’t allow animals on board.”

    (We go back and forth like this for a few minutes.)

    Caller: *desperately* “What if I say she’s a seeing-eye cat? I could put a little collar on her saying she’s a seeing-eye cat.”

    Me: “I don’t think that’s going to work.”

    Caller: “What if I dress her like a dog?”

    Me: “They’re not going to buy that.”

    Caller: “Why not?!”

    (The conversation continues in a similar fashion.)

    Caller: “You’re not allowed to hang up on me, are you?”

    Me: “No, ma’am.”

    Caller: “I feel sorry for you.”

    John Paul The Third (Time’s A Charm)

    | Dublin, Ireland | Funny Names

    Me: “Hi, Paul speaking. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “Who?”

    Me: “Paul.”

    Customer: “John?”

    Me: “No, Paul.”

    Customer: “John?”

    Me: “No, Paul. P-A-U-L.”

    Customer: “That’s not how you spell John!”

    Customers Should Watch Their Language

    | Buenos Aires, Argentina | Language & Words, Technology, Top

    (I work in tech support for a major US cable company, and sometimes we have to deal with people who just don’t want to talk to you because you’re foreign.)

    Customer: “You know what? I can’t understand a word you’re saying. You have an accent. Can I be transferred to someone who speaks English?”

    Me: “I’m pretty sure I’m speaking English right now, sir.”

    Customer: “Yeah, but I can’t understand you because of your accent.”

    Me: “So, basically you’re saying you want me to transfer you to someone else.”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Me: “Because I have an accent.”

    Customer: “That’s right.”

    Me: “And you can’t understand what I’m saying.”

    Customer: “Exactly.”

    Me: “So how come you were able to understand what I just said?”

    *a few seconds of silence*

    Customer: “Don’t be an a**-hole and just transfer me!”


    Page 69/127First...6768697071...Last