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    The Child After The Storm

    | Canada | Awesome Customers, Bigotry, Family & Kids, Top, Transportation

    (A bunch of young men are talking loudly in the bus and using a lot of expletives. They’re also with a female passenger who is apparently their friend and is black.)

    Young Male Passenger #1: “Yeah, she’s such a f***ing b****.”

    Young Male Passenger #2: “Because she’s a black c***!”

    Young Female Passenger: “What?!”

    Young Male Passenger #1: “Yeah!”

    Young Male Passenger #2: “You black c***s can be f***ing—”

    (At this moment, a boy of around age 7 gets on the bus. Hearing the rude conversation, the child immediately makes his way to the back of the bus and stands right in the middle of this group, as if challenging them to continue talking.)

    Loud group: *stays completely silent for 5 seconds*

    Young Male Passenger #1: “…Okay, never mind.”

    Young Male Passenger #2: “Um… I meant… you black ladies are… pretty crazy. Yeah. Pretty crazy at times.”

    (They stopped using offensive language after that, at least until the young boy’s parents called him back to sit with them!)

    Ooh, I’m Quaking In My Oats

    | USA | Food & Drink

    (This happened to a coworker of mine, who is a bus driver. It is against policy to let food on the bus, and there is a sign that clearly states this.)

    Passenger: *tries to get on the bus with a giant bowl of oatmeal*

    Coworker: “Sir, I’m sorry, but you can’t take that oatmeal on the bus.”

    Passenger: “What?! Why?”

    Coworker: “There’s no food allowed on the bus.”

    Passenger: “I won’t spill!”

    Coworker: “I’m sorry, but there’s still no food on the bus.”

    Passenger: “Well…YOU’RE UGLY!”

    From The Mouth Of Babes

    | Sydney, Australia |

    (While driving a bus, I overhear this conversation between a mother and her child right after a police car had driven by with lights and siren blaring.)

    Child: “Mum, is that police car coming for us?”

    Mother: “No, why?”

    Child: “Because you told the bus driver I’m three and I’m really four.”

    Bus(ted)

    | Toronto, ON, Canada |

    (A woman enters the bus with her son.)

    Me: “Excuse me, ma’am. Your son didn’t pay the fare.”

    Customer: “But children are free!”

    Me: “No, ma’am. Children’s fare is currently at seventy-five cents.”

    Customer: “Well, I’m not paying that! It’s free!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but you’ve been misinformed. Children still have to pay a fare to ride the bus.”

    Customer: “No they don’t! You’re just trying to scam me!”

    Me: “The fare box is locked, and is only accessed at the end of my shift, when I’m long gone.”

    Customer: *pointing to the fare box* “You’re lying! This thing opens right up!”

    Me: “If you can open it, your son can ride free.”

    (The customer proceeds to struggle with the box for some minutes.)

    Customer: “Seventy five cents, you said?”

    The Chump With The Hump Under Her Rump

    | Cleveland, OH, USA |

    (I’m bus passenger and notice another passenger sitting with one half of her butt on one seat, and the other on another. The divider is between them, squarely up her crack.)

    Bus driver: “Ma’am, you’ll have to move. This bus is very crowded and you’re taking up two seats.”

    Passenger: “What do you mean I’m taking up two seats? This is how you’re supposed to sit.”

    Bus driver: “No it isn’t, ma’am. You’re straddling the divider.”

    Passenger: “You mean this isn’t the ass cheek divider?”

    Bus driver: “No, ma’am, that’s the seat divider!”

    Passenger: “Aw… but it feels good to sit like this!”

    Bus driver: “Well, ma’am, your …pleasure… will have to wait.”

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