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    Making A Fare Point

    | Canada | Bizarre, Extra Stupid, Money, Transportation

    (I’m riding a bus watching people get on. One of the passengers walks past the fare box without paying.)

    Driver: “Excuse me! Do you have your fare?”

    Passenger: “Yeah. Here.” *shows the driver a handful of change*

    Driver: “Okay.”

    Passenger: “Okay.” *starts walking away again without putting the fare into the box*

    Driver: “Excuse me! What about your fare?”

    Passenger: *annoyed* “I have it right here!” *shows the handful of change again*

    Driver: “The fare goes in the box!”

    Passenger: “But I have my fare!”

    Driver: “And it goes in the box!”

    Passenger: *puts the change into the box, grumbling* “But I have my fare…”

    All Snowing, Not All Knowing

    | Edmonton, AB, Canada | Transportation, Wild & Unruly

    Man: “Hey, bro. Do you know when the number seven bus is coming?”

    Me: “It should’ve been here five minutes ago.”

    Man: “Un-f******-believable. I bet you anything the driver’s a woman or old.”

    Me: “Um… or this heavy snow delayed the bus, as it has for the last two days.”

    (Five minutes later…)

    Man: “F*** sakes, I got places to be. B**** needs to hurry up!”

    Me: “Calm down, man. You don’t know what happened.”

    Man: “Stop trying to stick up for these f****** lazy-a** drivers.”

    (I decide not to bother. Ten minutes later the bus arrives. We get on.)

    Man: “F****** finally. We’ve been waiting for an hour in the snow!”

    Driver: “I’m sorry. I was delayed by an accident. Sounds pretty bad; I had to be rerouted so the ambulances could get there.”

    (The man goes silent.)

    Me: “I hope you’re f****** happy now.”

    Baby On Board (The Bus)

    | Halifax, NS, Canada | Health & Body, Top, Transportation

    (I am 27 weeks pregnant and starting to have contractions. I am on the bus on my way to the hospital. The driver is aware of this. I pull the buzzer to get off the bus and start walking to the door.)

    Driver: *to me* “You sit back down!” *to the rest of the bus* “Is anyone going to need any of the next four stops? Because if so, I suggest you get off now, as we are detouring!”

    (The driver then takes us directly to the hospital. He stops the bus, gets out of his seat, walks me down the steps, and into the hospital! The next day I am still in the hospital. I call up the transit office.)

    Me: “Hi, yes. I was on bus [number] yesterday evening and the driver detoured from his route for me. I just wanted to make sure he is not in trouble. Because of him, they were able to save the life of my unborn son!”

    Transit Employee: “No worries, miss. We only got one complaint from a passenger. The driver called us as soon as he got back with everyone on the bus. He has been given a commendation for his actions yesterday. Thank you for calling, and take care!”

    Putting The Dire Into Directions, Part 2

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Geography, Transportation

    (I’m boarding passengers at a stop.)

    Passenger: “Excuse me, do you go to [street]?”

    Me: “No, ma’am, I’m going in the other direction.”

    Passenger: “Ugh! I was told that bus [number] goes to [street], but you’re the third one I’ve asked, and they all say they’re going in the opposite direction!”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, because all of the traffic on this side of the street goes in that direction. You need to board on the other side of the street to catch buses going in that direction.”

    Passenger: “But you’re bus [number]! You should be going that direction!”

    Me: “The bus routes go both directions, ma’am. You need bus [number] eastbound, on the other side of the street. Actually, I can see it just a few blocks down right now. If you just cross here to that stop right across the street, you can catch it in just a moment.”

    Passenger: “Oh, no, no, I don’t want to go all the way to the other side. I guess I’ll just have to keep on waiting. But if the right bus doesn’t come soon, I’m going to be very annoyed!”

    Related:
    Putting The Dire Into Directions

    Descending Into Obnoxiousness

    | Montevideo, MN, USA | Bad Behavior, Transportation, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m standing at the bus stop when I see the bus coming. There’s a car just a few meters before the bus stop, not allowing the bus to stop very close from the side walk. The doors open and a passenger starts descending, and stops half-way, blocking two other people and myself from getting in.)

    Me: “Ma’am, are you going to descend?”

    Passenger: “Yes I am, whenever this driver decides to get closer to the side walk.”

    Driver: “Sorry, but I can’t get any closer, ma’am. The car is blocking me.”

    Passenger: “You are obligated to stop 50cm from the side walk, and you are stopping at least a meter and a half!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but can you let me pass?”

    Passenger: “No, you’ll just have to wait. I guess I’m going to stay here until the next stop.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but the next stop is two blocks away, and I’ll never catch the bus. I really can’t wait for the next one.”

    (I try to get on, and she pushes me away with incredible strength and I almost fall.)

    Passenger: “No! You’ll just have to wait.”

    Me: “Look, we are happy to help you descend if that’s the problem, but we all need to get on the bus.”

    Passenger: “I don’t want you to help me descending. Do you think I’m crippled? I want the bus driver to respect the law or I’ll fill a complaint!”

    Person Behind Me: “Oh, come on! Just let us pass!”

    Me: “Yes, just let us in, and you can descend the next stop.”

    Passenger: *screaming at bus driver* “You should stop closer to the side walk; move the bus!”

    Driver: “Ma’am, I can’t. These people offered you help to descend if that was the problem, but you refused it. You can stay on the bus and descend at the next stop and let these people in, or just descend.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I have had enough! I need to get to my job.”

    (I manage to get on the bus even though she pushes me again. She eventually descends while cursing at all of us.)

    Me: “Wow, some people are just crazy.”

    Driver: “You have no idea, girl!”


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