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    BA BA BEE DA DUM DUM BAAA!

    | USA | Top

    Customer: “Yeah, my son really likes this one band that has a really popular song out right now.”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t know the name of their album, their band name, or the name of the song but the tune is like this: ‘ba ba bee da dum dum baaa.’”

    Me: “…”

    Customer: *not very happy with me* “Do you have any clue what I’m talking about?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry but we can’t really look up ‘ba ba bee da dum dum baaa’ in our computer.”

    Customer: “Don’t be a smart a** with me, missy.”

    Me: *trying not to laugh* “Ma’am, I’m not trying to be a smart a**, I’m just saying there isn’t really any way I can help you unless you have some information I can look up.”

    Customer: *yelling* “NEVER IN MY LIFE HAVE I EVER BEEN TREATED SO DISRESPECTFULLY AT SOME BULLS*** BOOK STORE! EVERY TIME I COME HERE YOU AND YOUR CO-WORKERS ACT AS IF IT’S SUCH A CHORE TO HELP CUSTOMERS!”

    Me: *trying really hard not to laugh* “Would you like me to call my manager?”

    Customer: “YES!”

    (I page my manager, which we have several but I lucked out and got the good one)

    Rad manager: *irritated because she was busy* “Is there a problem?”

    Customer: “Yes, the…”

    Rad manager: “No, I wasn’t talking to you.”

    Customer: “Well!”

    Me: “She wants me to look up a song using only the tune.”

    Rad manager: *laughs*

    Customer: *again, yelling* “IS IT SO HARD TO ASK FOR A LITTLE HELP OR DO YOU NOT OFFER THAT FOR FREE? ALL I NEED FROM YOU IS THE BAND NAME THAT SINGS THAT ONE SONG THAT GOES LIKE THIS, ‘BA BA BEE DA DUM DUM BAAA’! IT ISN’T THAT HARD TO FIGURE IT OUT!”

    Me: “So go home and figure it out and give us a call.”

    Customer: “I will never shop here again! I’m taking my business to Barnes & Noble!”

    Rad manager and I: “Okay. Bye.”

    Source

    Flight Of The Vagaries

    | Albuquerque, NM, USA |

    Lady: “I’m looking for a book; I don’t remember the name, but it has a green cover.”

    Me: *pointing to shelf* “All of our green books are over there.”

    How Do These People Remember How To Breathe?

    , | Rockford, IL |

    (Older lady comes in, doesn’t know me, yet decides to make me intimately knowledgeable about her husband’s surgery; she eventually runs out of steam when I don’t respond and looks around at the books on the shelves)

    Lady: “I like books.”

    Me: “Good! Anything you’re looking for?”

    Lady: *ignores my question* “I saw on TV that books are good to have because they make your house look nice.”

    Me: *barely stifling a smile* “Really? I heard they’re also good to read.”

    Lady: (Evidently, my comment goes right over her) “And you can use them to prop up the bed.”

    (Her husband buys books, and then swiftly escorts her out)

    Ask A Stupid Question …

    | Sacramento, CA | Top

    Bookstore Customer: “Do people donate all these books to you?”

    Me: “Yes. We show up for work every morning and there are boxes of valuable books sitting at the front door.”

    Bookstore Customer: “Wow, really! I could open a book store?”

    Me: “Sure!”

    Bookstore Customer: “If I opened a store, how would people know where to leave the books?”

    Source

    I’m Sure We Have A Book On That Topic

    | London |

    Customer: “Excuse me, how do I get up the stairs?”

    Me: “If you don’t already know, I’m afraid I can’t help you.”


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